Firefly: Alternate Universe PART 10
Monday, October 2, 2006

Part ten of an alternate universe for Firefly. An Operative shows up and wants one of the crew members. Which one?


Jayne reached out and grabbed Wash from Kane. "Now, you can't be takin' my drinkin' buddy..." He said, stumbling a bit. "I'll tell ya'bout I comes with ya and stuff, since I got'm into this drink'n stupor..." He looked pointedly at Kane.

He was a man of honor (slightly so anyway) and didn't usually take no for an answer, shown by his rifle. He was a bit wavy, but was able to get Wash from Kane.

"I'll help...I'm 'ero of Canton...." he chuckled, starting to sing. "...the man they call me."

Wash was confused. "'M'okay." he mumbled.

Kane, taking a deep breath (knowing things were about to escalate), stepped forward and looked into the hulking, self-absorbed "heroe's" eyes,"I have a counter, which, by the way, I would recommend you accept. I suggest you let go of my pilot, take a step away and consider how wonderful your life has been to this point. Then, consider how dreadfully bad it could become in a matter of seconds."

Jayne blinked, obviously still under the effects of the drink. One of the men around him stood up slowly and looked at Kane.

"I wouldn't be talkin' to the Hero of Canton like that."

Jayne waved the man off. "Aw...shut it, Joe, he ain't doin' no harm. He's just all worried 'bout his little pilot 'ere." He motioned to Wash. "I'll give an' exeption to his words, and my offer still stands. I'll help you get back to yer ship. I'm strong 'n stuff an' can help." The drink was starting to wear off in the man's eyes.

Kane leaned forward, sniffing Wash's breath. "Stay here and do your...male, bonding thing. In the morning, come back to the ship and get ready. I'm going to go back to the ship and eat." He turned to Jade and looked deep into her eyes.

" you want blue or red protein tonight?"

Wash looked at Kane and grinned while Jayne smiles. "That's the spirit, Cap'n" Jayne says, clapping Kane on the shoulder. "Me an' little man here will have fun drinkin' and stuff." He pulled Wash back into the throng of bodies around the drinking table.


(OOC: From here on is from a live session we did with the characters. That’s why it’s not quite as detailed. I hope to go back and edit it sometime when the mission is over.)

Back at the ship, Kane divided up the percentages from the money Sanka got selling the toiletries. He had about 500 credits and split it between Wash, Sanka, and Jade; each getting 10%. Finally, Kane and Jade went to bed. All was quiet...then Kane started tapping his feet. Jade woke up from the noise.

"Kane," Jade mumbles, smacking him with her arm lightly. "Stop." Kane stops tapping. "Sorry." He whispered. A few moments of quiet. "The hero of Canton..." Kane hummed to himself. Jade sighed noisily. "Kane!" "What?" "You're humming." "I am?" "Yes. You're humming that stupid song." "Sorry, it's a catchy tune." "I know. And I don't want to hear it at 1:00 in the morning." "Sorry." "Just go to sleep."


The next morning, Kane awoke at around 6:00. The chickens had been loaded the night before by Sanka, who seemed to love the chickens very much. Kane rolled out of bed, then went to check on things with the chickens and get something to eat. Jade woke up with you as well, and you both went into the kitchen to wait for Wash.

At about 7:00, when Wash still hadn't shown up for breakfast, Kane sighed. He got up and started towards the pilot's bunk. In front of the bunk, snores were heard, and he knocked.

No answer. Kane knocked harder. "Wash, time to get up."

Still no answer.

Kane was starting to get annoyed now. He put his hand on the doorknob and slammed open the door with a crash. "Wash! Get up!"

Looking inside, he saw a man on the bed, and it wasn't Wash. Kane frowned, then blinked, noticing the uncanny resemblance to the man he had met last night; Jayne Cobb. He looked at Jade, who just looked back at him in astonishment.

" there something about Wash we should know about?" He asked hesitantly. Jade opened her mouth to say something when they heard footsteps behind them. Turning, they saw it was Wash, who was yawning and rubbing his forehead. Kane furrowed his eyebrows.

"Hey guys." Wash moaned, holding his head. He had an obvious hangover. He noticed Kane and Jade looking into his room.

"What's going on?" He asked.

Kane stepped back. "I...Wash, I respect your privacy as another crew member...but...why weren't we invited to the ceremony?"

Wash looked at him. "What are you talkin' about?"

Kane motioned to inside his room. "If you didn't want to tell me, that's fine...but...I need to know if your bunking with someone."

Wash quickly ran to the door. "Ai ya, huai le--!" He exclaimed, seeing the snoring man on the bed.

Kane patted his shoulder. "Hey, if I hurt your feelings that bad the other day...just tell me..."

Wash gave him a flat look. "But...but.." he sputtered. Kane held up his hand.

"No, it's okay, I understand." Kane said, then reached for his transmitter. "Sanka, I need you in the crew's quarters area."

Wash went in to wake Jayne up. Jayne stretched and got out of the bed. "Good mornin' everyone. You come to say goodbye to the Hero of Canton?" He noticed Wash and grinned. "Oh, hey little man! Boy, we had fun last night didn't we?"

Wash groaned as Kane raised his eyebrows and Jade wrinkled her nose. Wash quickly looked over at Kane. "Nothing happened."

Sanka came up. "What is it, mon?" He asked, then he noticed the huge man. "Oy...what's he doing in Wash's bunk?"

Wash held up his hands. "Nothing happened!" He said. Sanka nodded.

"Yeah, mon. I understand, really. Hey, it's all one love. Some love different than others. I completely understand."

"No, you don't! I have a sweetheart at home; her name is Zoe! She's the perfect woman! I would never, ever cheat on her, especially with a male!" Wash pleaded to be taken seriously.


So, after a while, without anything too exciting happening...

Jayne was heard before seen. Sanka groaned at the off-key drunken voice.

“My love for me now ain’t hard to explain, the Hero of…hey ruttin’ chicken thing! LISTEN TA ME!” A loud crash echoed from the cargo bay and looking turned up the sight of Jayne kicking a box that held agitated chickens. The man had been drinkin’ again.

“Jayne!” Sanka barked.

“Wha-? What is it now?”

“Don’t tease the cargo!” Sanka called as loudly and clearly as he could. He heard another crash and an explosion of clucking.


“Wha? Who’s ‘ere?”

“Jayne…” Sanka paused. “…this is Buddha.”

“Buddha?” Sanka didn’t have to see Jayne’s expression to be able to imagine his wide-eyed disbelief.

“Yeah! Jayne Cobb, you stop scarin’ my chickens!”

“Them’s yer chickens? I didn’t know, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean ta!” Jayne’s voice got high and pleading.

“I know, and I forgive you, but you gotta promise not to kick, tease, or harm my chickens anymore.”

There was a long pause, as though Jayne was trying to wrap his head around this new fact. “C’n I throw grenades at ‘em?”

“NO!” Sanka shouted.


Day Four of Five day trip to Ariel...

Wash called Kane up to the bridge. "Captain, we've got a ship following us."

Kane groaned. Just what they needed. "What kind of ship?"

Wash was searching the Cortex. "Just a second....hold on....ah, here we go. It's an Alliance Patrol Ship."

"Are they waving us?"

"No, not yet."

"Good. Keep it that way."

All of a sudden, Wash leaned forward. "They're scanning the ship!"

Kane frowned. "Can you tell what they're looking for?"

Wash shook his head. "No, sorry."

Kane furrowed his eyebrows. "Hmm...neither can I. Let me get Jade up here." He reached over and clicked the intercom. "Jade, would you please come up to the bridge?"

Jade came up a few moments later. "What is it, Kane?"

"I need you to see if you can sense what they're scanning for."

Jade closed her eyes. "They are doing an in-depth scan of the ship. There are a full crew on board. Someone is of importance to the Alliance...he has a high rank. They are looking for someone. I can tell it isn't Maxx, though."

Kane frowned, then got on the comm. "Jayne."

"Yeah, cap'n! I put the box away!"

"Good. I need to ask you a question."

"Oohh...I ain't too good at math questions."

"It's not math. What have you done to make the Alliance mad?"

A pause.


"I ain't done no such gorram thing! I've been on Canton most my life! I swear on Vera! You know how much I love this gun!"

Kane nodded. If Jayne swore on Vera, than it was probably true. The man loved that gun more than any man could love a woman. He flipped to Sanka. "Sanka, I'm only going to ask you once. Have you done anything to make the Alliance mad?"

Sanka's voice came through. "No, mon."

Kane's gaze looked at Wash, who was fiddling with the pilot's controls nervously. "Wash?"

Wash looked up. "Yes, Cap'n?"

"Is there somethin' I need to be knowin'? Did you bring the Alliance on our tail?!"

Wash gulped. " was a while ago...I thought it was cleared over."

Many waves and one boarding from an Alliance Patrol Ship later...

The Operative stood calmly in front of Kane. They had searched the ship, and now the source of his mission was standing behind the captain. The Operative nodded at Wash.

"You are Hoban Washburne?"

Wash nodded. "Yes."

"You are the pilot held at Osiris for three weeks, correct?"

Kane raised his eyebrow at this. Wash nodded nervously. The Operative continued. "I'll need you to come with me."

Kane frowned, then stepped forward. "I can't have you take my pilot."

"I need him to come with me." The Operative said.

"And I said you can't take Wash off this ship." Kane said, getting angry. No one was going to take his crew without a legitimate reason. He made a promise to Wash that he would protect him as long as he flew the ship.

And he was seeing that promise being demolished in front of his eyes.

The Operative stepped forward and leaned close to Kane's face. "I wasn't asking."

"I know," Kane whipped out his pistol in one long move, all jokes aside. "But I was tellin'."

The tension rose incredibly with that one move.

The Operative stood there with a cold smile on his face. When Kane had whipped out his gun, he heard three other clicks from the guns behind the Operative from the other men. Kane gulped and opened his mouth to speak.

(OOC: Next chapter will not be from live session and will be more descriptive. Thanks for stickin' around!)


Monday, October 2, 2006 5:51 PM


Uh...what the f-bomb? This is getting into hilarious but freaking nutty territory. Though I did love me some of that Sanka-as-Buddha schtick with Jayne:D



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