REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

Hamm's "Premium" Beer, Born in the Land of Sky Blue Waters...

POSTED BY: 6IXSTRINGJACK
UPDATED: Monday, September 30, 2013 18:26
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VIEWED: 2271
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Thursday, September 19, 2013 11:26 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


OR...

"Why am I ONLY drinking 6 beers tonight"

OR...

"Why I'll be lucky if I can actually stomach more than 4 beers tonight"

OR...

"Satan's Piss"

OR...

"Shit I didn't know existed for the last 148 years for VERY good reason".

OR...

"A sign of the times in America when Pabst's Blue Ribbon is too expensive and all you can afford is this unholy abomination".

OR...

"I should have saved my pee when I was drinking Icehouse and froze it. It would have tasted better the second time around than this ungodly brew, the alcohol content would have still been higher, and i would have been saving trees and shit".



BE AFRAID!

And DON'T EVER, EVER, EVVVVEEEEERRRRR give a can of Hamm's to a friend if they come over, even uninvited. Always have one can of Icehouse around at least.

If somebody gave me a can of this shit, I would, seriously, not only have to re-evaluate our friendship, but I'd have to consider the possibility that they were trying to kill me.




Reply if you've tried it or if you've got an opinion, or even if you just don't like me and want to kick me when I'm down. I'll be around for a while. Trying to muscle my way through hopefully 3 more cans without "reliving the experience".

Love Always,
Jack

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Thursday, September 19, 2013 12:26 PM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!


Life is too short to ( intentionally ) drink crap beer.

Fathom the hypocrisy of a government that requires every citizen to prove they are insured... but not everyone must prove they are a citizen

Resident USA Freedom Fundie

" AU, that was great, LOL!! " - Chrisisall

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Thursday, September 19, 2013 12:33 PM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:
Life is too short to ( intentionally ) drink crap beer.



Intentionally, or otherwise, my friend....

It honestly is the most vile thing that has ever passed through my lips, and that includes things that have made their way out of them in these parts.....




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Thursday, September 19, 2013 7:06 PM

WHOZIT


Pabst's Blue Ribbon A/K/A Rot gut. The beer that can eat the paint off you car.

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Thursday, September 19, 2013 7:31 PM

JONGSSTRAW


Growing up in NY there were a lot of local cheap beer brands around like Ballantine, Rheingold, and Schlitz. I remember buying 6-packs with fake id for a dollar.

College in Ohio we drank a lot of Stroh's, Rolling Rock, and Carling Black Label.

These days it's mostly Sam Adams, Corona, and Heineken.


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Thursday, September 19, 2013 9:12 PM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!


I mean, if it's hot, I'm thirsty, and someone offers me a free Coors or something, sure. I'll oblige and be thankful. For the gesture, at least. Free beer and all, at least should be gracious for the offer.

Bass Ale, Sweetwater 420, Killians, Kilkenny, a Guinness even, from time to time.

Fathom the hypocrisy of a government that requires every citizen to prove they are insured... but not everyone must prove they are a citizen

Resident USA Freedom Fundie

" AU, that was great, LOL!! " - Chrisisall

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Friday, September 20, 2013 12:59 AM

FREMDFIRMA



Hamms ? Seriously?

ROFLMAO... you poor dumb bastard.

Look, go get yourself some Boones Farm, or MD20/20, even some Night Train, instead, cause this, this is just masochism man.

Here, have some reviews...
http://www.bumwine.com/

Of course, my preferred tipple was always, always the train.



-F


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Friday, September 20, 2013 1:12 AM

FREMDFIRMA



Of course, when you DO have a buck or three to yer name, and want some REAL fucking beer, hie thy backside down to a liquor store with maybe an ounce of class and get yer dirty bastard on.



IF YOU ARE WORTHY.
*smirk*

-F

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Friday, September 20, 2013 9:14 AM

GEEZER

Keep the Shiny side up


Our solution was to drink less beer, but drink better beer. Halve your consumption and you'll be able to spend twice as much per beer. That should get you at least into the Heineken/Sam Adams/Beck's range. Stuff you drink slowly for taste rather than chug to get it over with. Wherever you are, there's probably some good regional beers that are actually enjoyable, and not just alcohol delivery systems.


"When your heart breaks, you choose what to fill the cracks with. Love or hate. But hate won't ever heal. Only love can do that."

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Friday, September 20, 2013 9:49 AM

BLUEHANDEDMENACE


NICE Frem! I can highly recommend Arrogant Bastard Ale, thats some tasty shit right there.

It does come on strong tho, I wouldnt suggest it for someone who isnt a fan of beer flavors...it truly is a well named product.

I am lucky enough that my local supermarket has a great guy running the liquor store, he stocks all kinds of good stuff in there.

For something a little different, more along the lines of Geezer's drink less but better philospohy, would be Innis Gunn. It's a Scottish imported beer that they cask age in barrels that were used for Rum or Whiskey, and man is it good, but expensive.

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Saturday, September 21, 2013 9:27 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Quote:

Originally posted by whozit:
Pabst's Blue Ribbon A/K/A Rot gut. The beer that can eat the paint off you car.



Haha... Seriously though. I drink Icehouse as my "choice" 30 pack. Pabst really isn't that bad for me. Hamm's is just SOOO bad that I had to post about it. I've never drank a beer before where somewhere halfway in the middle of the 2nd can I did one of those half-vomit-burps and was done for the night.

Quote:

Originally posted by Jongsstraw:
Growing up in NY there were a lot of local cheap beer brands around like Ballantine, Rheingold, and Schlitz. I remember buying 6-packs with fake id for a dollar.

College in Ohio we drank a lot of Stroh's, Rolling Rock, and Carling Black Label.

These days it's mostly Sam Adams, Corona, and Heineken.




I've never even heard of Ballantine or Rheingold, but I've had Schlitz before. Around these parts they didn't sell Schlitz for years but brought it back in around 2008 when I was living in Wisconsin and bought it once just to try it even though I could afford way better beer back then.

Heineken was always my choice beer. Never really got into Sam and Corona was something I'd really just pick up for the ladies as it didn't pack much kick or taste unless you used salt and a lime. I love going to my Mom's for family parties because my Step-Dad usually has a 6-pack of Heinekens waiting for me. :)

Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:
I mean, if it's hot, I'm thirsty, and someone offers me a free Coors or something, sure. I'll oblige and be thankful. For the gesture, at least. Free beer and all, at least should be gracious for the offer.

Bass Ale, Sweetwater 420, Killians, Kilkenny, a Guinness even, from time to time.



Free Coors, or something, sure......

NOT HAMM'S though! Unless it's a bum off the street offering you a beer, whoever is offering you Hamm's is passive-aggressively telling you that they HATE you.

Love all those beers you mentioned too, but would never drink them regularly. If I get back to "that" place financially, those are the types of beers I'd rotate with local micro-brews and IPAs.


Quote:

Originally posted by FREMDFIRMA:

Hamms ? Seriously?

ROFLMAO... you poor dumb bastard.

Look, go get yourself some Boones Farm, or MD20/20, even some Night Train, instead, cause this, this is just masochism man.

Here, have some reviews...
http://www.bumwine.com/

Of course, my preferred tipple was always, always the train.



-F




Hey Frem,

Ahhhh... a man who has actually tasted Satan's Piss first hand.

At least you know what I'm talking about. I'm not a wine drinker at all, unfortunately. Hard liquor is out too because I black out on any of it. Get a moderate amount of Gin in me and I'm actually looking for a fight, which if you knew me in person is (believe it or not) something I not only try to avoid, but I'm quite good at getting myself and my friends out of if confrontations come up.

I am happy to know that this is the first and last case of Hamm's I will ever purchase. If there is only one good thing to say about this brew is that I don't think I've ever had a 30 pack in my possession that lasted this long. If I weren't so cheap, I would have poured 29 3/4 cans down my sink and gone right back out and bought my Icehouse.

Quote:

Originally posted by FREMDFIRMA:

Of course, when you DO have a buck or three to yer name, and want some REAL fucking beer, hie thy backside down to a liquor store with maybe an ounce of class and get yer dirty bastard on.



IF YOU ARE WORTHY.
*smirk*

-F



That looks SO GOOD!

It truly has been far too long since I've had a beer that didn't resemble urine when you pour it.

Quote:

Originally posted by Geezer:
Our solution was to drink less beer, but drink better beer. Halve your consumption and you'll be able to spend twice as much per beer. That should get you at least into the Heineken/Sam Adams/Beck's range. Stuff you drink slowly for taste rather than chug to get it over with. Wherever you are, there's probably some good regional beers that are actually enjoyable, and not just alcohol delivery systems.




Yes Geezer. I've heard that before.

I'm the last person to say that I don't have some growing up to do.



Quote:

Originally posted by BLUEHANDEDMENACE:
NICE Frem! I can highly recommend Arrogant Bastard Ale, thats some tasty shit right there.

It does come on strong tho, I wouldnt suggest it for someone who isnt a fan of beer flavors...it truly is a well named product.

I am lucky enough that my local supermarket has a great guy running the liquor store, he stocks all kinds of good stuff in there.

For something a little different, more along the lines of Geezer's drink less but better philospohy, would be Innis Gunn. It's a Scottish imported beer that they cask age in barrels that were used for Rum or Whiskey, and man is it good, but expensive.



Just because I drink swill to get drunk doesn't mean I don't enjoy a damn fine beer when I can get my hands on one. As for coming on strong, I don't think that will be a problem. Any of the beers I drink regularly now, including and maybe even ESPECIALLY this evil case of Hamm's is very STRONG. Icehouse is 5.5% by volume (used to be 5.9%).

I'm sure Arrogant Bastard and Innis Gunn are at least that if not a few percent more, but they actually TASTE GOOD.

If I could I would actually like to give the makers of Icehouse the Nobel Prize. How the hell do they fit 5.5% alcohol into a 12 ounce can that doesn't taste like you were licking random puddles of "whatever" in some dirty Chicago alley? Personally, I think it's amazing what they do.


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Saturday, September 21, 2013 4:52 PM

FREMDFIRMA



Shit man, I know what Sterno tastes like (don't ask...)

If yer not into wine so much you COULD maybe split the difference.
Krogers often has wine coolers on the cheap, 10-for-10 or sometimes even less.
The ones they're usually pitching are a malt-based Seagrams product if I remember correctly, for the price you could give it a shot.

My stomach doesn't take beer too well no more, hasn't ever since that long hospital stay, and the primary reason I drink is pain control given the DEA has doctors pissing scared of prescribing any, and my Doc (who is, because of this, leaving the COUNTRY in January) is high on the hit list cause he is of middle eastern descent, despite being a 2nd generation american citizen...

So for me, it's straight up cheap rum and maybe, MAYBE I might throw some ice and/or soda in there if I am having a good day, but usually... no.

Castillo ain't bad for the price, and without that nasty sour aftertaste ya get from Bacardi products.

-F

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Tuesday, September 24, 2013 4:23 AM

SHINYGOODGUY


Ballatine's, Rheingold, hell why not Southern Comfort........for pure unadulterated rot gut!!!!

LMAO and puking my brains out......


SGG

Quote:

Originally posted by FREMDFIRMA:

Hamms ? Seriously?

ROFLMAO... you poor dumb bastard.

Look, go get yourself some Boones Farm, or MD20/20, even some Night Train, instead, cause this, this is just masochism man.

Here, have some reviews...
http://www.bumwine.com/

Of course, my preferred tipple was always, always the train.



-F



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Tuesday, September 24, 2013 4:32 AM

SHINYGOODGUY


I mostly remember the commercial with the bear and the slogan. When I was a kid about 10 or 12 and I would visit my father in Chicago during summer breaks from school. He would be home on the weekends and turn on the ballgame to watch his beloved Cubs.

That beer commercial would come on and I was transfixed, mainly because it was an animated commercial with the bear commandeering a canoe. Born in the land of the sky blue waters (or was that Pabst Blue Ribbon beer).

Brings me back.............and it makes me think of my father, may he Rest in Peace.

Excuse me a minute


SGG

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Tuesday, September 24, 2013 4:40 AM

SHINYGOODGUY


Yeah, there are a few things that have changed over the years. Heineken, Corona and Bacardi tastes nasty to me. So I began drinking Molson Golden whenever I crave a good beer (which is not to often these days). But let me tell you something I've found, Bacardi in Puerto Rico tastes so much better than in the U.S. It could be the water or it could be the way in which they forment it.

Best rum I ever had was called Four Barrels, in St. Thomas. Smooooooth!


SGG

Quote:

Originally posted by FREMDFIRMA:

Shit man, I know what Sterno tastes like (don't ask...)

If yer not into wine so much you COULD maybe split the difference.
Krogers often has wine coolers on the cheap, 10-for-10 or sometimes even less.
The ones they're usually pitching are a malt-based Seagrams product if I remember correctly, for the price you could give it a shot.

My stomach doesn't take beer too well no more, hasn't ever since that long hospital stay, and the primary reason I drink is pain control given the DEA has doctors pissing scared of prescribing any, and my Doc (who is, because of this, leaving the COUNTRY in January) is high on the hit list cause he is of middle eastern descent, despite being a 2nd generation american citizen...

So for me, it's straight up cheap rum and maybe, MAYBE I might throw some ice and/or soda in there if I am having a good day, but usually... no.

Castillo ain't bad for the price, and without that nasty sour aftertaste ya get from Bacardi products.

-F


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Wednesday, September 25, 2013 3:17 AM

6IXSTRINGJACK




Straight up Rum.... man... I hope you handle that better than I do....

I drink beer because the only time i black out on it is when drinking WAY too much at home and posting HERE :)

Hard liquor is OUT, because I blackout anywhere in front of anyone on it....

RUM is a different story though....

I ACTIVELY look for fights while drinking Rum. Wasn't cool when I was 22 and could handle myself while drunk... definitely isn't cool now.

Hope Rum is nicer to you Frem...




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Wednesday, September 25, 2013 3:44 PM

FREMDFIRMA



Oh no doubt about it, funny thing is that my personality doesn't actually change a whole lot when I am blitzed, save that I tend to be a little more open and honest, as opposed to closed off and cryptic, but it's not all that noticeable till I am well and truly pasted... like now.

Hell, some days I don't even bother with a glass, just spin the cap off with my thumb, then get my thumbnail under that stupid plastic ez-pour widget and pop it out to be played with by the cat and then drive home a hefty slug or two - on a good day I might pour it into some ice and/or creme soda (known to me and friends as a sugar-shock) but usually.. no, given that I am using it for pain control.

Today more than usual, end result of a hot call, retrieval mission and seven stitches I ain't even gonna talk about cause if I weren't getting old and slow that never woulda happened in the first fuckin place, dammit all to hell.
The short of it, someone grabbed a kid and the parents were decent enough to want em back and go to alternate means when "the law" laughed in their faces cause there weren't no money in it.
So now my left hand is even MORE fucked up, oh joy oh joy.
Getting old sucks balls man, it does.

I do find it ironic that a certain "name" still inspires complete terror, but I think imma prolly have someone else take up the monniker after this little adventure drove home just how old and broken I am after all these years.

Anyways, I never pass out or black out, I just get sleepy, and my essential personality doesn't change a whole damn lot no matter how much I put away - no Jungian surprises in there cause I have assimilated and become my shadow-self, I am who I am, and that's the whole of it.

-F

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Thursday, September 26, 2013 4:01 AM

SHINYGOODGUY


Old and slow is my middle name, well, second middle name next to short, fat and handsome (I threw in that last part). So I know that song all to well.

And yeah, it sucks major elephant balls to get old.

So here's to ya' my friend........


Skol!


SGG

Quote:

Originally posted by FREMDFIRMA:

Oh no doubt about it, funny thing is that my personality doesn't actually change a whole lot when I am blitzed, save that I tend to be a little more open and honest, as opposed to closed off and cryptic, but it's not all that noticeable till I am well and truly pasted... like now.

Hell, some days I don't even bother with a glass, just spin the cap off with my thumb, then get my thumbnail under that stupid plastic ez-pour widget and pop it out to be played with by the cat and then drive home a hefty slug or two - on a good day I might pour it into some ice and/or creme soda (known to me and friends as a sugar-shock) but usually.. no, given that I am using it for pain control.

Today more than usual, end result of a hot call, retrieval mission and seven stitches I ain't even gonna talk about cause if I weren't getting old and slow that never woulda happened in the first fuckin place, dammit all to hell.
The short of it, someone grabbed a kid and the parents were decent enough to want em back and go to alternate means when "the law" laughed in their faces cause there weren't no money in it.
So now my left hand is even MORE fucked up, oh joy oh joy.
Getting old sucks balls man, it does.

I do find it ironic that a certain "name" still inspires complete terror, but I think imma prolly have someone else take up the monniker after this little adventure drove home just how old and broken I am after all these years.

Anyways, I never pass out or black out, I just get sleepy, and my essential personality doesn't change a whole damn lot no matter how much I put away - no Jungian surprises in there cause I have assimilated and become my shadow-self, I am who I am, and that's the whole of it.

-F


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Thursday, September 26, 2013 9:19 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Quote:

Ballantine, Rheingold, and Schlitz
What? No Genesee Cream Ale?

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Monday, September 30, 2013 6:26 PM

6IXSTRINGJACK


Don't need or want "terror" here Frem....

Honestly, I have NOTHING to steal at my house worth anything. My "tech" is ancient today, although I know how to make it do much more than modern commercial tech at the same time....


All I'm saying here ever is that I've made life my bitch. and at the same time my saving grace was that a bitch was never a part of that equation....




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