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BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL
Kaylee and Simon leave the ship. Best to read from Good Intentions Part One-Five.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 1551 RATING: 9 SERIES: FIREFLY
Not mine, just writing for fun.
A/N: So here is the end. It has taken me a bit to get this done, sorry! I had birthdays and a load of work to contend with but I do hope you will enjoy this last installment. There will be an epilogue, hopefully soon. Thanks for all who commented on my fics and a special thanks to Leiasky for her inputs! Hope you all like it and please comment, I really appreciate them.
Simon sat on the train as it sped along, holding his sleeping daughter against his side as she slumbered. Kaylee sat in the seat next to them, herself fast asleep, as the day had been quite draining. He smiled as Molly let out a sigh in her sleep and snuggled closer to her father. Kaylee's stomach was close to bursting as she had just hit her ninth month, her hands resting protectively against it. They were on their way to their new life, filling Simon with joy and trepidation. He was going back to being solely a doctor, raising his family in the comfort and safety of a small town. Yet his joy was tempered by the pang of guilt that had risen from leaving his sister and found family back on Serenity. His thoughts returned to the early hours of that morning.
Simon had left his wife fast asleep in their bed. She had looked so peaceful, he couldn't bear to wake her up just yet, even though it was the day of their departure. He had made his way up the stairs to the galley only to find he wasn't the first up.
His sister sat at the end of the table facing the hallway, two cups of steaming tea in front of her. Her knees were pulled up to her chest in the chair, and for all the 'verse she seemed to have reversed her age, looking like the scared sixteen year old girl that had crawled out of a cryo box into the middle of the cargo bay. Over time she had developed into a full grown woman with an air of wisdom well beyond her years. She had not fully recovered from the torture inflicted by the Alliance sponsored Academy, she had lingering effects of the psychosis brought about by extreme trauma, but more often than not, she was a lucid, if a somewhat quiet and reserved young woman. Simon had guarded his thoughts about leaving the ship as best he could around his sister. He didn't want River to question his devotion to her, and he had felt as if he was betraying her when those thoughts crept into his head. When she had broached the subject after their encounter with Atherton’s hired thugs, he had felt such a sense of relief. Now his heart sunk as he cast his eyes upon her.
Simon rushed over to her side as hot tears began to slide down her face. Kneeling in front of her, Simon held her shoulders in a firm grip, making her face him. Her hands snaked up to cover her face in a futile attempt to hide her pain. Simon had moved his own hands off of her shoulders to draw the hands away.
"Mei mei, please don't cry."
His words were soft and gentle, falling on her ears like a warm blanket, soothing her fears.
River pulled her hands away and reached up to wipe the tears from her face, sniffling a little as she composed herself.
She tilted her head and smiled at him. He grinned back, but the worry for his sister would not fade.
"I am so selfish."
Simon cast a disapproving look at his sister while his heart began to ache for her.
"Don't ever say that, mei mei. You could nev-”
“You make me feel safe Simon, whole. Like a real person.”
Simon brushed the hair that had fallen into her face away, tucking it behind her ears, “You are a real person River.”
“Sometimes I feel like a shell, and inside I hold all these thoughts and memories. They dance around the pit of my stomach. I try so hard to keep it all at bay. I don’t want to scare any one, but only you Simon, you can see it and not be afraid.”
River reached out, cupping his cheeks, “I know you and Kaylee are ready to leave, but I don’t know if I am ready for you to go.”
Simon stood up from where he had been kneeling in front of his sister and pulled her out of her seat to face him.
“Mei mei, you are the strongest person I know. You have lived through a hell that would pale in comparison to my wildest imaginings. You’ve emerged to become an astounding woman, one who seems to do the impossible at every turn with such little effort. When I first walked into this room you looked so much like the girl that I had taken from the Academy, but that‘s not you. Over the years you have transformed, you are no longer that broken bit of a girl. Now you have your whole future ahead of you. I feel proud that I have helped to guide your recovery, but only you could have done it. Your own determination is what has made you the beautiful woman you are today. You make me feel accomplished and leaving you has been one of the hardest decisions of my life. I couldn’t live with myself if it causes you so much pain.”
River buried her head into Simon’s chest as she wrapped her lithe arms around his torso, “Time to grow up, I know it is. I just don’t want to feel lost when you go.”
Simon raised his own arms to encircle her, sighing as he replied, “We’re all lost in the woods.”
River turned her head up to face Simon, giving him the eye, the one that said to him- did you really just say that?
River squinted at him, “Inara told you that.”
Simon smiled at his sister, “And now I am telling you.”
“No you weren’t, you were trying to pass it off as your own.”
“I can’t believe you would think me capable of...I mean...is that...is that tea for me?”
River gave him a knowing glance and then nodded. Simon let go of his sister to kiss her on the top of her forehead before seating himself in the chair next to hers.
“I see that the brat phase is one you will never grow out of.”
River beamed at her brother, the tears gone now, though there were still small smudges on her face from when she had wiped them away, “It’s a permanent trait.”
Simon took in his sister’s disheveled appearance, then took another sip of his tea, “I did find some comfort about your condition improving when you began brushing your hair. I hope you’re not slipping.”
River scowled at her brother, “Not all of us can be as tidy as you are in the morning. Well not so tidy any more."
River reached out and touched the beard Simon had been growing ever since he decided it would be best to purchase new identities for Kaylee, Molly and him as a precaution, in case the Alliance still held a grudge after so many years. She scrunched up her nose, showing him her displeasure at the new facial. Simon batted her hand away in annoyance, leaving a brilliant smile on her face at the ability she still possessed to irritate her brother, "I am glad to see you have grown out of the boob phase, with only a few minor digressions.”
She then took a sip of her tea and reached out across the table to take a hold of his hand, finding peace in the last few moments they would share alone together on Serenity.
Simon reached over to place a hand along his wife’s, rubbing the skin of her arm as she adjusted herself in her sleep. Kaylee let out a soft, sleepy moan but stayed fast asleep. Simon looked out the windows of the train car, watching the landscape speed by, changing from the lowlands of the farming communities of Beilyx as they began to enter the mountains. Pine trees dappled the rocky terrain as they moved further into the range. His life was changing as rapidly as the scenery, leaving a sense of excitement, but it was tainted with the feeling of guilt and remorse at having to leave his sister and found family behind.
After they had dealt with Atherton Wing on Persephone, Serenity's crew had settled back into the routine of daily life, with the exception of the decision Simon and Kaylee had made. With the cut they would receive from selling the Vermeer, it would afford Simon and Kaylee the opportunity to settle anywhere, with new identities and a nice nest egg. Mal’s apprehension at letting Inara use her contacts to expedite the pawning process were dismissed when she quickly found a buyer, surprisingly only five days after they had “liberated” the piece of art from Wing. Of course, she had not asked permission, but when the selling price came back, Mal was hard pressed to refuse. Simon smiled to himself as he remembered Mal’s jaw dropping to the floor when Inara came into the galley announcing she had found a buyer for the Vermeer.
He and Mal had sat down after dinner while Kaylee was putting Molly to bed. Simon had felt the pit of his stomach turn as he stated to Mal that he and Kaylee would be leaving Serenity.
Mal sat back in his chair and scratched the side of his face as he let the words sink in.
“Can’t say it comes much as a surprise, doc.”
“I hope you understand that I am grateful for all that you have done for River and I. All that has been sacrificed.”
Simon let the words hang between them as they both thought on Wash and Shepard Book. Simon lived everyday with the twinge of guilt that had come from the massacre on Haven and the loss of Wash at Mr. Universe’s complex. If he had not brought down the wrath of the Alliance on the crew of Serenity, both may still have lived.
Mal gave Simon a stern look, “The past is the past.”
“Still, I do not want you to go away from this without knowing how truly indebted I am to you. I am sure that without you giving us refuge on Serenity we would have been hunted down and captured. Who knows what they would have done to River and I am quite certain I would be dead. For that I will always be obliged, but I have to ask you for one more favor.”
Mal sat forward and leaned in as Simon proceeded, “Please look after River for me.”
Mal let a smile tug at the corners of his mouth, “More’n likely she’ll be the one protectin’ us, but she’ll be taken care of, I can promise you that.”
Simon nodded his approval as Mal leaned back again, crossing his arms against his chest, “Still leaves me without a mechanic and a medic.”
“We’ll stay as long as needed for you to find replacements. Of course, River is a genius, she could always fill in.”
“Don’t think Jayne would be too happy, her having a scalpel near him.”
Simon smiled as he thought of how terrified Jayne would be to have his sister operating on him.
“To stave off mutiny, we’ll stay till replacements are found.”
Inara swept into the galley just as Mal eased out of his chair to fill his mug with more coffee. She was all smiles, though Simon could tell she was prepared for a row by the way she held her hands on her hips.
“I’ve sold the Vermeer.”
Mal’s eyes almost bugged out of his sockets from the shock of her defiance at his orders to stay out of business.
“You went behind my back an-”
“Three hundred thousand platinum.”
Simon didn’t think it was humanly possible for Mal’s eyes to get any larger, but he was proven wrong in this instance.
Inara smiled as she saw the bewildered look fall over Mal‘s face, “Three hundred thousand. I found a buyer on Athens. It will be...discrete, she wants it for her private collection and no questions asked.”
Mal stood in the middle of the galley, the mug forgotten, hanging from his hand.
“I told her it would take us at least three weeks to deliver,” Inara crossed the room to take the mug out of Mal’s hand, sweeping past him to place it on the kitchen counter.
Inara nodded her head in agreement and repeated the price again to him.
“I mean...it’s just a...”
“Painting, I know Mal.”
Simon quietly scooted his chair back and exited the galley, leaving Inara to take charge of Mal as he left to tell the good news to Kaylee.
Molly rubbed her face against Simon’s stomach as she began to wake from her nap, letting out a small whimper as she clutched his shirt.
“Shh, li shu.”
Simon pulled his daughter up into his arms resting her head on his shoulder as he rubbed her back. Molly settled against him, fisting her hand in the excess fabric of his shirt while she slid the other one around his neck. She turned her head, resting it against the crook of his neck, her tiny breaths whispering against his skin. He cradled her gently hoping she would fall back asleep since they were still a good hour away from their stop, the last on the line.
When Mal had finally “allowed” Inara to go forth with her plan to sell the Vermeer, he began to actively search out a replacement for Kaylee, she being the most important job to replace. As Mal scoured the Rim for a mechanic that would be at least half as talented as Kaylee, the Tams began their own search for a new home. As they laid in bed only a month ago, Simon brought up the thoughts he had been wrestling with ever since they had decided to leave. Molly, unable to sleep alone had been brought to their room for the night. She had nestled between Simon and Kaylee, her head resting against Kaylee’s chest, her little body molded along Kaylee’s pregnant stomach. Simon reached out to touched his wife‘s face, inadvertently waking her.
Her voice was raspy with sleep.
“Kaylee, I’m sorry.”
Simon caressed her cheek and then smoothed some hair away from her face and whispered, “Go back to sleep.”
Kaylee’s eyes opened more at the insistence in his voice. “What’s wrong sweetie?”
“It’s nothing, we can talk about it in the morning.”
Kaylee shook her head, “No, we can talk now. Sides, I’m already up. This little one is like a furnace.”
Simon noticed the soft sheen of sweat that glistened on Kaylee’s fore head as he pulled the blankets off his wife, leaving just a cool sheet covering her.
Simon took a deep breath, letting it out slowly, “I was just thinking about...my life back on Osiris.”
Kaylee’s brow furrowed as she held her breath.
Simon knew she was still a little insecure about the life he had lead before he and River had stepped aboard Serenity, and like the fool he was, his words had come out all wrong.
“My work, on Osiris...in the hospital. I miss helping people Kaylee.”
“What’re you tryin’ to say Simon?” Kaylee’s eyes widened as thoughts began to swim through her head, her voice was hushed but her words were tinged with alarm, “We can’t go live in the Core. Ain’t no way the ‘Liance will let us be there. I don’t see how ya can work in a hospital. Those shiny new credentials ya got can be found out about, no matter how good they are. And that silly beard won’t fool them for long if they’re lookin’ hard enough. We got plenty a money now, but it still won’t buy ya your life back.”
Simon reached out to pull her hand to his lips , kissing it gently before he put to rest her worries.
“That’s not what I mean bao bei. I wouldn’t want to go back to that life even if I had the chance to. Never, my life is here, with you and our family. I just want to give something back. I’ve been thinking about Shepard Book lately. I want to contact Brother Matthew at the South Down Abbey.”
Kaylee’s face softened as she let his words comfort her.
“There is always work for a doctor out on the Rim, but I want to give more, Kaylee. I don’t want to be some country doctor tending to some little town, I want to do work that truly matters. Shepard Book and I had talked about his missionary work at times and their are those out on these worlds that have never even seen a doctor, let alone have the opportunity to get any kind of suitable medical care. I want to give back to the ‘verse for all that it has given me. It won’t be a life of great luxury but we can live comfortably. I don’t want you to feel pressured Kaylee, I will do what ever you want, I ...I-”
Simon didn’t finish his sentence as Kaylee’s hand came to rest against his mouth. Her eyes shone with unshed tears as she whispered, “I think it’s a real pretty idea.”
Simon leaned over to kiss his wife without disturbing their sleeping daughter. As their lips parted, Simon smiled back at Kaylee, his heart swelling with the joy he felt at finding this beautiful angel in the most dire of circumstances. Every day she amazed him, and he laughed to himself when he thought about how he had even doubted her for one second.
By the time Simon had contacted Brother Matthew, Mal had news of his own for the crew. He had found a replacement for Kaylee. Everything had moved so swiftly, it was like a whirlwind for the next month. Brother Matthew had been thrilled to hear that a Core trained doctor would be even willing to do work for a mission, as he could find a position anywhere in the ‘verse. When Simon had mentioned Shepard Book, Brother Matthew’s expression dropped to one of melancholy for a moment before a serene smile spread across his stout face.
“He was a man of inspiration at times.”
Simon had felt guilty lying to the man about his name and circumstances meeting Shepard Book in the first place, but he knew it was for the best. By the next day, Brother Matthew had three placements for them to choose from. When Simon brought the news to Kaylee she looked a bit overwhelmed. She had just finished preparing lunch for them when Simon had entered the galley after speaking with Brother Matthew. She had just scooped out some bowls of protein when he told her the news.
Her eyes widened for a minute before she plastered a great big smile across her face, “Everything’s moving so fast.”
Simon caught the beleaguered look Kaylee had tried to hide and took her into his arms,” If it’s too fast Kaylee, we can wait. We don’t have to do this at all if you want. I can find a placement in some town, maybe near your parents if you want.”
With those words Kaylee broke down, the tears streaming along her cheeks as she tried to contain them.
“I just never thought that it would all go so quick, Simon. Mal already found somebody to take over my job...I feel like I am losing who I am sometimes. Then I look at you and Molly, I feel this baby moving round inside me, and it makes me feel selfish for wantin’ to stay. Serenity’s my girl, and everyone on board’s my family. I guess I just want it all, and that ain’t fair to nobody.”
Simon smiled at his wife before kissing her soundly.
“I want you to be happy Kaylee. What is going to make you happy?”
Kaylee smiled back at him, “You.”
She giggled as he kissed her again, letting his hand trail down her back and come around to rest on her belly.
“Gorram it, if I haven’t seen enough of that in past couple a years, she’s already knocked up, can’t ya keep your hands off her already?”
Simon and Kaylee parted to see Jayne scowling at them.
Kaylee just beamed at her husband,” I’m gonna get Molly up from her nap.”
As she left the galley, Kaylee slapped Jayne on his arm, giving him the eye before leaving for the stairs.
“Oww,“ Jayne rubbed the side of his arm, “That girl is unnaturally strong for such a bitty thing.”
Simon ignored Jayne’s comment while he placed the bowls of food on the table. Jayne grab a bowl of his own, piling in as much as Kaylee had dished out for the three of them, and proceeded to wolf it down right there, leaning against a column. He finally slowed down after consuming half the bowl’s contents, Simon still staring in awe after all these years at his atrocious eating habits.
“Heard ya talking to one a Shepard Book’s brothers just now. Think it’s nice, ya wantin’ to help folks. Ya take care of‘em like ya take care a River and Kaylee n’ the baby, they‘ll be lucky ta have ya.”
Simon was taken aback by Jayne’s honesty. He knew that Jayne had developed a friendship with Shepard Book, the loss of him had hit Jayne the hardest he suspected, though he had never really shown it. Yet this was something of a surprise. Simon had no words to respond back to him, so he did the only thing he thought was appropriate.
Jayne finished what was left in his bowl, and threw it into the sink.
“Well,” and with that Jayne left the room.
Simon just stared at where Jayne had left, still shocked at his admission when Kaylee returned with Molly in her arms. She walked up and leaned against him, garnering his attention from the empty hallway.
“What’d he say?”
Simon just shook his head, “Something I’d never thought I would hear from him.”
It still astonished Simon that Jayne had even spoke those words and a smile crept across his face as he moved Molly down to his lap, resting her against his side as she had settled down enough to fall back asleep.
Kaylee had been in tears as they had said their good byes that morning, plowing herself into Mal’s arms as River held tightly onto her niece. Simon stood back and just watched as River hugged Molly fiercely, not wanting to let go. Mal kissed the top of Kaylee’s head and then extricated himself from her as Inara took his place, holding her gently and whispering into Kaylee’s ear. As they parted a brilliant grin swept across her face.
Kaylee kissed her cheek and hugged her again. Simon still hadn’t asked what Inara had said to make her so happy, but he was sure she would tell him in due time.
Zoe was the last to enter the cargo bay, a small box in her hands. She came up next to Simon as Kaylee rushed over to River and Molly, still weeping.
“This is for the babies, something for you all to remember us by.”
Simon took the box from Zoe and lifted the lid to find most of Wash’s toy dinosaurs inside. He smiled at the contents and then back at Zoe, placing the box in his bag.
“I kept a few for myself, but they were meant to be played with, and I can’t think of anyone Wash would’ve wanted to have them, other than our own children.”
Simon grasped one of her hands and squeezed it gently. Her remorse at not having the family she had wished for with Wash was something they had never discussed. Simon took the offering as a token of the friendship they had developed over the years. To Simon, Zoe had been the most mysterious of the crew and yet so much like himself. She just patted his shoulder and then walked herself over to where Kaylee was, enveloping her in a hug that was so uncharacteristic it shocked practically every one on board.
Jayne slapped Simon on the back, holding his shoulder for a bit before releasing it to stand aside for River who had brought Molly over for him to take.
“Still don’t want you to go.”
She beamed through her tears as she handed over his child. Simon smiled down at her as he cradled Molly who had begun to whimper from all the emotions flooding around her. Mal strode over to Simon as Kaylee and Zoe ended their embrace. Inara had reached out to pet Molly’s hair, looking forlornly at the toddler. Simon could tell she was desperately miserable to see them go, but kept her composure in front of the rest of the crew.
Kaylee sniffled as she turned to the Captain, “So ya sure this fella’s gonna work out for ya.”
Mal smiled, “He’s good, Bernouli recommended him. He’s just another stop over on Santo. Don’t be frettin’ on us now, you’ve got enough on your plate as it is.”
He reached out to touch her head, smoothing her hair in a brotherly fashion. Kaylee let the last of her tears trail down her face as she took Simon’s hand.
Simon looked to Mal, resigned to end this long good bye for the sake of his wife and child’s emotions, “Thank you again, Mal. Sorry we couldn’t stay for you to find a replacement for me.”
Mal chuckled to himself and then wrapped one of his arms around River’s shoulders, “Got us a genius here, I’m sure she can figure out how to patch us up, if needed.”
River gave Jayne a leering smile as his eyes bugged out at the prospect of her working on him.
Inara patted Jayne on the shoulder as she stood in front of the little family. She took a deep breath and then reached out to pet Molly’s hair again before placing her hand on Kaylee’s stomach, “Send a wave as soon as this baby is born.”
She kissed each of them on the cheek before turning and taking up Mal’s hand. Simon began to usher Kaylee out the cargo bay doors, but not before she grabbed a hold of Jayne, hugging him tightly. He stood stiffly as she let go and smiled at him.
“Time to go bao bei,” Simon placed his hand on her shoulder as he moved her towards the cargo bay doors. Kaylee sniffled as she looked back at the crew, raising her hand to wave good bye.
The train began to slow to a halt as they headed for the last stop. Simon reached over to gently shake Kaylee awake.
“Ai ren, this is our stop.”
Kaylee yawned as she opened her eyes, smiling at the sight of her husband holding their daughter as she slept, “How long’ve I been out?”
“About three hours.”
She reached out to grasp his hand as the train lurched to a stop. Simon shifted Molly as he helped Kaylee get out of her seat. After exiting the car, they were met by the only person standing on the platform, a rather large woman in a grey somber dress. Her clothes may have been solemn, but her face held a light that almost rivaled Kaylee’s.
Simon stepped up to her, still holding Molly as one of the attendants from the train pulled up a mule carrying crates that they had shipped with them. Kaylee stood just to his side, smiling at the woman.
“You must be Sister Joan.”
“Yes, I am. You must be Dr. Connors.”
“Yes, but please call me Simon.”
She smiled brightly at them, reaching out to take Simon’s extended hand. She shook it vigorously then turned to Kaylee, “Well no one said we’d be having a new little life coming to us, as well as a doctor and his family, this is just such a blessing. Now let’s get you in the mule, this must have been a trying journey on you, Mrs. Connors.”
Kaylee beamed at the sister, “Just call me Kaylee, and this is Molly.”
She reached out to place a loving hand on her sleeping daughter.
“Well that is a pretty name. Now let’s get you out of this chilly air. Night will be coming soon and we have dinner already being prepared. Just a little more traveling and before you know it, we‘ll be there.”
Sister Joan guided Kaylee to the end of the platform, Simon following behind still clutching Molly tightly as she slept, motioning for the attendant to follow them. His heart swelled as he watched the two women talk animatedly between each other.
He leaned his mouth against Molly’s ear whispering, “Time to see our new home, li shu.”
Monday, May 1, 2006 12:57 PM
Monday, May 1, 2006 1:09 PM
Monday, May 1, 2006 1:50 PM
Monday, May 1, 2006 2:46 PM
Monday, May 1, 2006 9:57 PM
Wednesday, May 3, 2006 7:18 PM
Tuesday, May 9, 2006 5:42 PM
Monday, May 15, 2006 12:11 PM
Thursday, June 15, 2006 1:59 AM
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