Don't Go Away Mad
Sunday, April 2, 2006

YAY another installment of my highly acclaimed S/K series! (okay I'm a moron lol) It's River's 18th birthday and Jayne gets her a special gift. As an additional warning, guys, this has some Rayne naughtiness (no actual sexin' quite yet) as well as Silee. Again, this is NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!


"Simon!" River's cry pierced through the peace that wrapped around Serenity. Simon sat up sharply, jostling Kaylee. He got up as fast as he could, pulling on his sweatpants before going into his sister's bunk.

River was curled up at the head of her bed, wearing nothing more than a long sleep shirt and some warm socks. Simon sat on the bed next to her, gently putting his arms around the distraught girl.

"Mei mei, what's wrong? What is it?" She shook, sudden tremors of fear jerking through her shoulders. Her eyes were gazing blankly at the mattress. He moved the hair that had fallen over River's face, tucking it gently behind her ears.

"It's coming. Don't know what's proper. Never done this before." Tears started falling from her eyes. She looked so scared. All Simon could do was hold her as she ranted. "Know everything about him, how he thinks, how he feels, but I feel more. Don't know how to make him see."

"Who, River? What do you mean?" He hated having to ask these things of her. Usually it was a subject that was painful for River to discuss. She looked sharply at Simon, taking a moment before deciding it was okay to tell him.

"Love. He doesn't but I do. Afraid he just wants a good rut." If Simon hadn't been sitting so far on the bed, he would have fallen off. Now he was afraid of what she was talking about.

"Mei mei, who are you talking about?" He had a sneaking suspicion he really did not want to know.

"Don't hurt him, Simon. I love him." River started shaking again, unable to stop her fear from rising.

"Who do you love, River?" Simon was getting more worried by the minute.



Simon woke up with a start. He was breathing a bit hard as the dream played over in his mind. Kaylee murmured next to him in her sleep, then rolled over, wrapping her arms around his waist. Even when she was sleeping she tried to comfort him. Simon sighed softly and lay back down, trying to remind himself that he had only been dreaming.


At breakfast the next morning, River seemed anxious. Simon watched her move around the galley faster than he'd seen her move before. It was almost as if she was trying to busy her hands. When she finally sat down, she was bouncing her knee and playing with her food.

"River, are you alright?" Simon failed to notice River's imperceptive glance at Jayne before answering.

"Just anxious for my birthday. Big presents. Kaylee makes good cake." River practically started shoveling food into her mouth.

"Well don't get your hopes up, Crazy, 'cause I ain't gettin' ya nothin'." Jayne smirked and started serving himself a second helping.

"Yes, you are." River smiled and finished her plate, getting up to rinse it off before going back to the cockpit to check on how much longer it would be before reaching Beylix. Inara excused herself and went after River, hoping to speak privately with her.

As the rest of the crew finished their meal, conversation was animated. Mal discussed the drop off plan with Zoe and Jayne, and made sure the crew knew they had day leave for three hours after the drop off went down to buy River her birthday gifts. This job was actually legit, so there was no possibility of foul play.

Everyone finished breakfast and saw to the jobs that needed doing. Kaylee washed up the plates while Simon went to do some tidying up in the infirmary, and Mal stayed with Zoe in the cargo bay, loading up the mule with all the crates. Jayne went to his bunk briefly to get the two pistols he was bringing with him, then returned to the table to polish them up and reload all the cartridges.

Meanwhile, Inara made her way to the cockpit to speak with River, who was studiously looking at all the controls in front of her.

"River, sweetie, are you feeling alright?" She came up from behind River and sat down in Wash's old chair.

"Simon dreamed about it last night. He's gonna find out." River turned to look at Inara. "If he finds out, he's gonna try to hurt Jayne, and Jayne will just beat Simon up."

"He dreamed about Jayne liking you?"

"No. Dreamed that I said I loved Jayne." River looked away, a little ashamed. Inara tried not to look shocked.

"You love him, River? Are you sure?"

"I think so. But I was pretty sure in the dream." River checked the control panels one last time. "We should be hitting atmo in 2 hours. Jayne is going to buy me a birthday present."

"That's what you said at breakfast. Do you know what he's going to get you?" A smile slid across River's face that was almost as bright as one of Kaylee's smiles.

"I know part of it."


Serenity landed on a particularly barren area of Beylix, just south of the local village. As Mal, Zoe, and Jayne prepped the mule one last time, Kaylee and Simon went to their separate bunks to gather their money and whatever supplies they'd need while planetside. After the drop off went smoothly, Mal was going to get back on ship to keep River company. He'd already given some of his money to Inara and arranged for her to get something for his little albatross.

As the mule took off, Kaylee walked quietly over to Simon's bunk, watching him get the last of his things together. She stepped inside the doorway, slipping off the clothes she had on as silently as possible before letting the door close. When Simon heard the door, he turned around to find Kaylee, completely nude, standing in front of him.

Kaylee grinned as Simon's jaw dropped a little, and she slowly started running her fingers down her neck, taking her time passing through the valley between her breasts and down her stomach. As she reached only an inch from her clit, Simon rushed to her and pushed her up against the door, kissing her intensely. Kaylee moaned happily, then grunted in frustration as Simon grabbed her hand and pinned it above her head when she tried to reach her aching core.

Simon was already rock hard. Seeing Kaylee touch her bare skin made his whole body tremor. All he knew now was that he had to have her. He kept her arm pinned above her, grinding himself against her sensitive flesh. Kaylee took in a shaky breath, moaning as she exhaled. She broke the kiss, her lips grazing his as she whispered to him. "You're a little overdressed for this ain't ya?"

Kaylee took her free hand and started pulling the fabric of Simon's shirt up. He let go of her momentarily to help her remove all of his clothing, then grabbed both her hands, holding them against the door. Kaylee jumped up a bit, wrapping her legs around Simon's waist. She ground her wet folds against his solid length, moaning and panting. She'd never seen him like this, wanting her with an almost primal need. Her last coherent thought before he thrust into her was that she was definitely going to enjoy this.

Simon grunted as Kaylee's wet heat enveloped him, and he shook a little as she keened against his mouth. He kept her arms pinned with one hand, using the other to support Kaylee's backside. He started thrusting into her, almost roughly, causing Kaylee to cry out repeatedly. Their bodies started clinging together as sweat formed on their heated skin. Kaylee felt a drop of perspiration slide between her breasts, settling in the curve of her navel.

Simon's pace was furious. He felt like he was on fire, the need boiling inside him until he almost snapped. Kaylee was yelling out, calling his name and cursing under her breath. She felt an orgasm building inside her that was hotter and more intense than anything she could imagine. Her arms struggled against his hand, wanting desperately to massage the bundle of nerves at the apex of their bodies. Instead, Simon just held her ass more tightly.

Suddenly, something clicked inside Kaylee's body. The feel of his fingers squeezing her backside was what fired off all her senses, surging her into an earth-shattering orgasm. Kaylee's whole body became weak and limp. All she could do was let Simon pound into her repeatedly, as her inner walls gripped his length.

"Kaylee!" Simon cried out as he felt her tighten around him. It was more intense than any of her other orgasms. He thrust a couple more times before spilling himself into her, Kaylee's inner muscles milking his release out of him. He let go of Kaylee's wrists and wrapped both his arms around her waist, slowly slipping to his knees. Kaylee moaned softly, feeling his last pulses correspond with the final, gentle waves of her climax.

They held each other tightly, Kaylee's legs still wrapped around Simon's waist. Both of their bodies were covered in sweat, beads of it dripping down Simon's back. Kaylee leaned up and kissed him fervently, her whole body shaking with need, despite the mindblowing orgasm she just had. Simon kissed her back, in kind, pulling her tighter to his body. He could feel himself stiffen within her again, making Kaylee gasp.

Simon wrapped his arms more tightly around Kaylee and stood up, carrying her to the bed. He laid her down, resting his weight on his arms as he started thrusting slowly. Kaylee moaned softly, her head thrashing from side to side. He was going so slow and sweet that the sensations, along with the residual sensitivity from their last orgasms, made every movement almost too much for her to take.

The pace this time was gentle and langourous, both of them unworried about creating another orgasm. Simon just wanted to take his time with Kaylee, to watch her face as the pleasure rolled over her. Kaylee felt as though this was just an aftermath of their last orgasms; another form of prolonging the last moments of ecstasy. Her skin felt electric. Bolts of pleasure snapping through her body, concentrating at her entrance. It wasn't like the wildfire that ran through her before. Instead it felt like a gentle thunderstorm during a summer night.

Simon could feel the electricity running through his skin as well. Sudden tremors passing over him as each jolt struck its goal at his erection. He kept his thrusts slow and long, pulling out almost completely and sliding back in as deeply as her body allowed. Sweet sighs and moans escaped Kaylee's lips, making Simon smile. He was letting out his own gentle yet ragged breaths, sweat still falling from his skin.

Kaylee let her hands roam over Simon's swai body, her fingers slick with his perspiration. He moaned her name softly, which made Kaylee smile. Without warning, Simon wrapped his arm under Kaylee's waist and flipped them over, still buried inside of her. Kaylee gasped, then started her own rhythm on top of him. She was just as slow and sweet, only instead of thrusting, she just rolled her hips continuously. Now his hands were on her, caressing her skin, cupping her heavy breasts, then slipping his fingers over her damp nipples.

Simon's touch made Kaylee shudder and arch her back, her hips churning a little faster. Simon tugged and pinched her hardened nipples between his sweatslicked fingers, then leaned up and captured one between his lips. Kaylee moaned loudly, leaning down to give Simon more access. Simon tasted the salt of her skin, mixed with both of their perspiration, and it hardened him further. He started pulsing within her, an orgasm bubbling under the surface.

Kaylee gasped as he went to lave her other tightened nipple, the sensations overwhelming her body.

"Simon." Her voice was barely over a whisper as an orgasm hit her without any warning signs. It was gentle, yet intense, washing over her until she could not think. Simon shuddered, his own release coming silently. He held tightly to Kaylee as they both were taken over by their pleasure, finally collapsing on one another.

Kaylee moaned contentedly, nuzzling her face into Simon's neck, and softly licking the sweat from his skin. Simon took in a slow, shaky breath, enjoying the feel of her soft tongue on his sensitive skin. They lay there for several minutes, just enjoying one another's company.

Kaylee looked up at Simon. "We should take a shower so we can buy River's birthday presents." Simon smiled and held her closer.

"We probably should. Of course it's not like River doesn't already know what she's getting for her birthday."

"True, but if we go take a shower together, we can clean each other off." Kaylee grinned happily, making Simon chuckle.

"You mean to tell me that wasn't enough?"

"Oh that was yummy, but I'm real good at washin' up, and we're both real dirty." The glint in her eyes told Simon that getting clean was nowhere in her plans.

"Well, I guess I have no choice. We are really dirty, and I trust your cleaning skills." He smiled at her. "After all, you can get all those cute engine grease smudges off your face."


River rolled her eyes. They were still having sex. And now they were doing it in the shower! At this rate they were never going to get River's birthday presents before they had to be off-world. Of course what really mattered was Jayne's gift. Despite what he'd said at the table that morning, she knew he was getting her something.

The gift was something stupid and trivial, but it meant something. It meant he liked her. Enough to spend some of his hard earned money on her. Which, from Jayne, meant a lot. She smiled and picked out her dress for tomorrow evening's birthday dinner.

"Bleh..." River scrunched up her face and stuck her tongue out. That was like the third position Simon had tried with Kaylee since they got in the shower room. She ignored the sensations running through her body and found the dress she was looking for.

It was burgundy with a sheer slip of blue over the top, casting a purple sheen over the fabric when it moved. One sleeve went down into a blue fishnet that was long enough for her to slip her thumb through. The other was a thin spaghetti strap in the burgundy fabric. To get Jayne's attentions, she planned to wear her black combat boots that went up to the knee. They had no laces, just thick straps with large silver buckles.

After setting aside her outfit for the next night, River laid down on her bed, adjusting her mind to listen to Jayne's thoughts. The drop off was almost done, and Jayne was busy unloading the crates of food. River grinned suddenly. He was hard. His mind wasn't on the job, it was on River. He was already determined to go to his bunk when he got back to the ship.

River shed her dress and slid under the warm blankets of her bed. She let her mind wander, imagining she and Jayne were the ones in the shower. She trailed her fingers down the side of her neck, picturing Jayne pushing her up against the shower wall, trailing rough kisses along the same path her hand took. She could feel the stubble on his cheek grazing her skin, sending chills down her spine.

In her mind, his mouth trailed lower, the coarse hair brushing over her breasts as he captured a nipple in his mouth. River's fingers tugged that same nipple, a soft moan passing over her lips. Her body responded to the heated shower water she imagined running over her skin. Her hand trailed lower as Jayne's mouth did, pinching and sliding whenever she felt Jayne bite or lick.

Suddenly River gasped, her fingers finding her wet center, just as Jayne's mouth sought it out in her thoughts. His tongue did not ask permission before pushing past her entrance, making her whisper his name as her breath caught. River's fingers thrust inside her as slowly and roughly as Jayne's tongue would, making her body shudder. She felt Jayne lift one of her legs to rest on his shoulder as his mouth assaulted her wet folds.

In her mind, Jayne did not slowly tease her orgasm from her. Instead he forced it, biting, sucking and licking it from her body. River bit her free hand, muffling a shout as the pleasure took over her, drowning her in one tidal wave after another.

Slowly the flood subsided, and River was left panting and weak as she became aware of her surroundings. She slowly slid her fingers from herself, walking to the small sink in her bunk to rinse them off. She took some bathroom tissue and gently wiped off her swollen core, slight tingles of pleasure zapping through her at the touch.

River redressed and made her bed up, making sure everything was in order before leaving her bunk to go bug Simon and Kaylee. They were done in the shower, so Simon wouldn't be too grumpy with having his little sister irritating him. River smiled and found the couple barely getting out of the shower rooms.

"If you guys don't stop having sex, you're never going to buy my presents." Kaylee giggled a bit, while Simon made an embarrassed groan. River just smiled happily and walked off, her feet moving gracefully along the cool metal floor.

"She's kinda right, Simon. Cap'n an' Zoe an' Jayne should be gettin' back real soon." Kaylee kissed Simon gently, holding the door to his bunk open so he could get his things.

Simon picked up his money clip and a couple other items. "I think River knows what I'm going to get her already. The funny thing is, I don't even know." Kaylee giggled more and led Simon out toward the crew dorms so she could retrieve her things from her room.


Jayne was wandering through the streets on Beylix. The job was finished, and Mal had gotten the payload stashed away. Jayne had sworn to River he was just goin' to get away from her crazy babbling, but she kept insisting he was going to buy her a present. Currently though he was trying to avoid buying presents for himself as he passed by a weapons shop.

As he weaved through the folk on the streets, Jayne let his thoughts drift back to River. That girl was a gorram nutball. Always sayin' the most moonbrained fei wu, and somehow always bein' so gorram right about whatever she said. The part that confused Jayne was that he was attracted to her.

The girl may be crazy, but Jayne couldn't deny that she had looks. Her lithe figure belied a strength that made Jayne rock hard. Seeing her fight in the Maidenhead had distracted Jayne so much, that he had barely noticed when Mal motioned for him to do something to stop River. To make matters worse when he'd grabbed her, she'd taken hold of his hardened bulge in such a way that he almost couldn't feel the pain she'd inflicted.

Jayne was lost in his thoughts of her now. He'd tried to think up ways to catch River naked aboard ship, but he was smart enough to know that she would anticipate any plans he had. So Jayne had been left to his imagination. He had to imagine how her long hair would feel rushing across his chest, and the way her inner walls would tighten around him when she came.

"Gorrammit." Jayne cursed under his breath now. Everytime his mind went to her, it turned to ruttin'. Now he was uncomfortably hard beneath his pants, and in no position to do anything about it until he got back to his bunk. At this rate, he needed to get back quick, so he ducked his way into the next store he saw. He looked around for about 10 minutes, and suddenly found something he hadn't expected. A gift River would actually like.


Everyone came back with a small shopping bag in their hand, except Jayne, who had stashed his gift in his pocket. He didn't want the captain to know he'd turned soft enough to buy a present for a female that wasn't his mother. He quickly went to his bunk and found some plain brown paper and thin rope to wrap the gift in.

Once he'd finished he set to work undressing quickly, eager to free his straining erection from the tightening confines of his pants. He grabbed one of the cloths he kept by his bed, then laid back, wrapping his hand around his thick length. He groaned and closed his eyes as he started stroking himself roughly, imagining River's strong inner muscles were tightening around him.


Inara had purchased a few extra things while she was out buying presents for River. Among them were some food items to make for dinner, and a cake mix for Kaylee to make the birthday cake. She had Kaylee come to the kitchen to start putting the cake together while Inara put away the food.

"You makin' dinner then, 'Nara?" Kaylee poured the powdered cake mix into her bowl, adding the protein based egg substitute and some cooking oil. She grabbed a large wooden fork to mix everything together.

"Yes. I believe Simon once told me River loved shao mai steamed dumplings and fried noodles with peanut sauce." Inara smiled as Kaylee's face lit up.

"Ooh! 'Nara that sounds tasty. You need any help with the cookin'?"

"Sure, mei mei. You can help me chop the meat and vegetables, and once I've stirfried them, we can both start assembling the dumplings."

Kaylee practically squealed in excitement. She loved cooking, she just never got a chance to be around anything more than protein substitutes and canned goods very often. She finished mixing the cake batter and poured it into a baking pan. She slid the pan into the small oven and set the timer.

"When ya wanna start?" The grin on Kaylee's face was getting wider by the minute. Inara just smiled gently.

"Let's wait until the cake has finished baking to start with dinner. Then once we've got the dumplings steaming and the noodles in the pan, the cake should be cool enough to frost."

"Okay. The cake should take about forty-five minutes, so if ya don't mind, I'm gonna go see to Simon." Kaylee winked, making Inara giggle politely and send Kaylee happily on her way with a wave of her hand.

Kaylee found Simon in the infirmary, as usual. He was just cleaning up his supplies, having finished wrapping up the presents he and Kaylee had gotten for his sister. He saw Kaylee and smiled, motioning for her to enter the space. She sat on the exam table and gave him a gentle kiss. Simon smiled back, letting his fingers trail over her cheek.

"So what did Inara need you for, baobei?"

"To start bakin' up River's birthday cake, and to ask me to help her later with cookin' dinner." Kaylee smiled once again, still quite proud that she had the opportunity to cook with actual food.

After a few moments, her smile became suggestive. "But I got forty-five minutes with nothin' to do. I was thinkin' maybe you could keep me occupied." Kaylee's eyes glinted with desire, while Simon felt himself swell slightly within his slacks. Kaylee grabbed him by the shirt, pulling him to stand between her legs. She saw Simon's mouth open slightly, and kissed him passionately before he could protest.

Simon responded in kind, his tongue dancing with Kaylee's. Within seconds, he had forgotten what he had intended to say and pressed himself against her. Kaylee made soft, mewling moans against his lips, unfastening Simon's pants with a speed he had never seen from her. Moments later, her hand was wrapped firmly around his freed length, using slow strokes and a tight grip.

Simon moaned a little louder than he'd intended into Kaylee's mouth. He reached under her coveralls, which were already tied loosely around her waist. His fingers slipped easily under her panties, using the same, fluid motion to slide two of those fingers into her already dripping entrance.

Kaylee's lips left Simon's in a sudden gasp, then her teeth found his lower lip, tugging it softly. He shuddered and suppressed a groan, plunging into her repeatedly with his fingers. Kaylee's hands kept working at Simon's length, stroking at the same pace his fingers thrust into her.

Suddenly, Simon looked up, and grinned. "Hang on a minute, xin gin." Kaylee nodded slightly, and Simon withdrew his fingers, holding up his pants as he walked around the infirmary, thanking god in every language he knew for the shades he'd had Mal install for gynecological examinations. He pulled them over all the windows, then made sure the door had been locked, giving Kaylee and himself total privacy.

He came back to the exam chair and tugged her coveralls off completely. He unfolded the stirrups that hid away under the seat, slipping Kaylee's feet into the soft sheepskin padding. Kaylee was panting, her hips rolling up against the air, begging for what she knew was coming next.

Simon stared at Kaylee for a moment, smiling at how gorgeous she looked when she was this worked up. His cock swelled, in pure male pride at knowing he was the cause of her pleasure. He bent his head down between Kaylee's thighs, reveling at how wet she was. He carefully ran his tongue over her folds, cleaning off the salty fluid.

Kaylee let out a shaky breath, the feeling of his tongue overwhelming her senses. Before she could take a stronger breath back in, his lips closed around her swollen clit, his tongue laving it within his mouth. The air caught in Kaylee's throat, making her gasp a few times as she tangled her fingers in his silken, dark hair.

Simon worried the bundle of nerves gently between his teeth, trying not to shudder as Kaylee's fingers laced into his hair. Her touch was overwhelming to him, but he focused his concentration on continuing to pleasure her. As Kaylee started thrashing her head back and forth, Simon slipped his fingers back into her slippery core, his tongue and lips still focused on her most sensitive bud of flesh.

"Simon... Wode tian!" Kaylee's body arched up, her inner walls grasping his fingers as her orgasm built within her. She let out a loud string of Chinese curses as the pleasure suddenly burst, the release washing over her entire body. Simon smiled and eagerly lapped up every drop of her orgasm, his fingers still working in and out, bringing her farther and farther over the edge.

Kaylee's orgasm kept wracking her body intensely, suddenly making her burst into giggles. Simon stopped and looked up at her, curiously as her laughing stopped. He arched a brow and kept watching her, stroking his fingers a few more times. Her laughter bubbled up again uncontrollably. Her whole body tremored with her mirth. Simon stopped again, sliding his fingers slowly out of Kaylee's core.

"Baobei? Why are you laughing?" Kaylee just giggled quieter now, shaking her head.

"I dunno, sweetie. I guess it got to be too much 'n' I just started laughin'."

Simon just kept looking at her curiously, clearly amused, but undeniably confused. "So, what... you just had a laugh-gasm?"

Kaylee erupted in laughter again, and Simon grinned, moving over her and sliding his rock hard length into her. He immediately started thrusting within her, Kaylee's laughter continuing. He groaned, still grinning, as her laughter caused her inner walls to flutter uncontrollably around him. Kaylee finally grabbed his hips, forcing him to stop moving so she could catch her breath.

Simon grinned, letting Kaylee take in several deep breaths before she began rolling her hips and mewling softly. He started moving again, just as intensely, not sure whether he was pleased or disappointed that she'd stopped laughing. He slid his fingers into Kaylee's hair, holding her head up a bit so that he could kiss her passionately.

Kaylee's back arched as she wrapped her arms around Simon's neck, kissing him back as a sheen of sweat slicked her forehead. She moaned loudly into Simon's mouth, feeling the fire build within her body. She felt Simon's hand slide across her breasts and down her smooth stomach, settling at her clit.

Kaylee cried out as his fingertips started slipping over the overworked nerves. Simon began thrusting more roughly, still kissing Kaylee and massaging her clit, focused completely on giving her a second orgasm.

Kaylee gasped, moving from Simon's lips and burying her open mouth in his neck before screaming, this release ten times as powerful as the last. Simon groaned loudly, spilling himself hotly inside of Kaylee, her inner walls grasping at his pulsing length.

As he came down from his release, he continued moving his finger at the apex of their bodies, commanding Kaylee's pleasure with his touch. She gasped several times, trying her hardest to avoid the inevitable. A soft snort preceded the boisterous laughter, making Simon smile and continue with his torture.

Kaylee squealed a bit between breaths, not being able to voice much else in the way of a protest. Her laughter got so out of control that her body started thrashing a bit in her attempt to make him stop. She was having fun, but she still needed to breathe!

Simon started laughing with Kaylee, her legs kicking against him, while her hands batted in vain at his hand. Through his laughing, he moaned a couple times, feeling her muscles grip him tightly still.

Finally Simon relented, collapsing on top of Kaylee, kissing a trail of flame across her neck. She shivered and held him tightly for a few moments, panting and moaning softly.

"Kaylee, you're done laughing. Come help Inara with making my dinner!" River giggled from the other side of the infirmary door, then ran off to her bunk to change into the dress and boots she had picked out for the dinner.


River squealed in excitement for the dinner Kaylee and Inara cooked, even though she already knew what she was getting. The pork and spring vegetable steamed dumplings were even better than River remembered her mother's had been, and the fried udon noodles were great too. Simon was pleasantly surprised that his little sister actually requested a second helping of both dishes.

After dinner was finished, Kaylee lit some candles she'd placed in the cake while Inara cleaned up the plates. River was grinning wildly as Inara had to help Kaylee carry the thing to the table.

"My cake is bigger than yours was, Simon." She stuck her tongue out at her older brother, who just shook his head.

Jayne rolled his eyes. "Most things are bigger than Simon's." Kaylee smacked Jayne's arm.

"Not so, Jayne. He's plenty --"

"Could we get back to the cake guys, I'd like to keep my appetite long enough to eat it." Mal was trying not to look as uncomfortable as discussing his medic's equipment. Simon just continued to shake his head before answering his sister.

"I think they actually had cake mix this time, mei mei, so I think there was more batter to go around."

River's smile didn't fade as she closed her eyes to make her wish. Right before she was done, she opened one eye, just a bit, to find Jayne watching her intently, instead of the cake. Her smile widened as she opened her eyes completely and blew out the three candles on her cake.

After the applause and cheers died down, River grabbed a small knife and began cutting the cake. Simon watched her carefully, making sure she didn't cut herself. She gave herself the first piece, sticking her tongue out at the crew. Jayne looked a little surprised as he received the second cut. River just smiled gently and proceeded to hand out the rest of the pieces she'd cut.

As they ate happily, one by one they handed River her gifts. Simon had saved up enough money for a writing set, similar to Inara's. There were various paintbrushes, several parchment rolls, and inks in black, red, green and gold. River hugged Simon tightly and thanked him as Kaylee set the gift she'd purchased in front of the younger girl.

River opened it excitedly and found a new night dress. It was pale blue silk that was cut to hit River right above the knee. The thin straps were adjustable and led to a scoop neck. River held Kaylee tightly and whispered in her ear. "Thank you, sister."

River looked at both Simon and Kaylee, smiling. "I have a gift you guys can give me together."

"What would that be, mei mei?" Simon looked amused, while Kaylee looked at her curiously. River looked directly at Kaylee before answering.

"Trade bunks with me." She looked at Simon with her patented "I can kill you with my brain" look. "Please. I'd like to sleep in a bed on my birthday instead of on the couches in the common room."

The crew laughed loudly, Simon's face turning red, while Kaylee giggled. "Sure sweetie, I'm sure it'd be shiny for both of us for you to take my bunk." River smiled and nodded satisfactorily.

"I've already packed up my stuff for the move."

After the laughter died down, Mal's gift was next. He'd asked Inara to buy something that had a fish or an albatross on it. Instead of the joking gift Mal had intended, she had purchased a delicate, silver chain that had "Albatross" written in an elegant script instead of a pendant. River loved it and gave Mal a small kiss on the cheek.

Zoe gave River a new pair of boots and a small stuffed stegosaurus, which River knew was from Wash. Inara's present was a beautiful, deep purple silk dress. The back came low and the front laced up, almost like a corset. A layer of shimmery black lace floated over the fabric.

Underneath the fabric was a lace bra and panty set to match, which Inara had hidden under more tissue. River knew it was there without needing to uncover it. She thanked both Zoe and Inara, then grinned as everyone looked expectantly at Jayne.

"What? I told ya I ain't givin' ya nothin'."

River just smiled happily. "That's okay, Jayne. You sat through me opening the other presents, and that's enough. You can go make half babies now."

Jayne's eyes widened, remembering River's conversation with him a few days back. He tried to adjust his suddenly uncomfortable erection before answering.

"Uh, no girl, that ain't necessary. I can have s'more cake."

"One of these days, you're going to actually call me by my name. No one else but me will hear it, though."


When everyone was asleep, Jayne checked quietly to make sure River was still in the cockpit. Once he was satisfied that she was distracted, he silently made his way to her new bunk. Kaylee and River had spent about three hours packing up all Kaylee's stuff, making Simon and Jayne bring the boxes of both girls' things to their appropriate room.

He opened the latch and climbed down. He looked around and decided to place the present he'd wrapped on River's bed. As he turned to leave, Jayne found River only a few inches from him, making him jump out of his skin.

"I told you you'd get me a present." She went over to it happily and sat on the bed to unwrap it.

"I weren't gonna get you nothin, girl. Just saw it n' thought you might like it. I had the money so I figured what the hell."

Inside the plain brown paper, River found a beautiful, thin dagger. The handle was made of polished agate, banded with various browns and black. The double-sided blade was made of the strongest steel, etched with ornate patterns. To be honest, she had expected a weapon, but not this. She looked up at Jayne with tears shimmering in her eyes.

"It's beautiful. Bodice dagger, meant to be worn between the breasts back on Earth-that-was." A small tear slipped down her cheek. "Meant to protect."

Jayne shifted uncomfortably on his feet and mumbled. "Glad ya like it."

River wiped her tears away and set the dagger down on her night table, moving to stand in front of Jayne. "There's something else you want to give me." Jayne looked at her with wide eyes.

"I ain't buy ya nothin' else, Crazy." River smiled a bit, the strap on her dress falling off her shoulder.

"I didn't say you bought something else. Something you want to give me."

River barely made out a very muffled "Don't kiss 'em on the mouth."

"You won't pass out."

Jayne looked up at her, and she tried not to grin at the slight blush at crept up his neck. What he really wanted to do was lay River down on the bed and bury his painful hardness inside her. He wanted to hear her call his name as he spilled himself within her tight wetness.

Instead, he leaned down gently and barely touched his lips to hers. There were no fireworks, but the warmth of her touching his mouth made him bold, and his leaned in for more contact.

River shuddered, her whole body rippling with pleasure as his lips moved against hers. Without thinking, she brought her hand to rest on the nape of his neck, her fingers brushing against the short hair there. She moaned delicately as his tongue sought gentle entrance. She let it past and brought her own tongue to dance with his.

Jayne hadn't planned this. He was just going to brush his lips across River's and leave before she could say somethin' creepifyin' and true. Instead, he started wrapping his arms around her waist, making the kiss more intense. River's small, sweet sounds were making him crazy. Jayne drew one hand up her back, and slid the other down her hip, disappointed to remember her dress came down just past her knee.

River gasped as the hand between her shoulderblades slipped around to cup one of her small breasts. At the break of contact, she could hear Jayne thinking about how badly he wanted to go farther. She leaned into the touch, shuddering more now. She whispered softly against his lips.

"Can't tonight. I'd make you sleep here. Simon would be angry."

"I don't care what your brother thinks."

"Yes, but he would try to hurt you, and you'd just hurt him worse."

"Then I'll just go sleep in my bunk when we're done." He trailed kisses down her neck, his stubble bringing the skin there to life.

River moaned shakily before responding. "You won't want to, and I wouldn't let you." Jayne's lips slipped down farther, brushing across her bare collarbone. "When we get to Persephone, Simon and Kaylee will be gone all day. I'll be in the spare shuttle. 1300, no sooner."

Jayne gently took his lips from River's goosebumped skin, looking up at her with darkened eyes. They would be landing on Persephone in nine days. He was almost unsure he'd be able to wait that long. River's hand trailed up his thigh and brushed softly over the bulge in his pants.

"You can wait."


Fei wu - garbage

Wode tian - Oh God


Sunday, April 2, 2006 12:14 PM




The S/K stuff is SO incredibly hot. Yeesh, I think I need a cold shower after that.

Even the River/Jayne stuff was great.

Keep it up! Or, rather, keep Simon that way. . . hee

Sunday, April 2, 2006 12:21 PM



Hot, hot, hot, and more hot! Simon and Kaylee are pretty. They have pretty!sex, and it's just plain shiny.

And the River/Jayne stuff is...ooh, yeah. NICE.

Sunday, April 2, 2006 5:49 PM


Wow...that moulded protein they eat most times must have a crapload of vitamins and nutrients in it cuz....there be a lotta sexin' goin on!


This is some might hot and fine stuff you have here, JanaFae. Silee AND stamina needed for all that lovin' just makes my mind go "Whoa" and "I'll be in my room"(ain't got no bunk) ;)


Sunday, April 2, 2006 6:52 PM


Now that's what I call havin' good sex. I'll be in my bunk and/or shower. ;)

Tuesday, April 4, 2006 12:36 PM


Nice job!!! I love that even in her sleep Kaylee comforts Simon, so cute and Whoa! on the...yeah.. that stuff!:D

Thursday, April 13, 2006 5:02 AM



Wednesday, June 7, 2006 9:39 AM


guh, guh and GUH!!!


Thursday, July 6, 2006 8:03 AM


As I read your works, you are just getting higher on my favorite writer list. You write River so well, and the Rayne stuff is just how I like it.

Yay for the random rough sex against the door.

*River scrunched up her face and stuck her tongue out. That was like the third position Simon had tried with Kaylee since they got in the shower room.*

There is something to be said for variety, nice one.

GUH! @ the River solo scene.

"So, what... you just had a laugh-gasm?"


"One of these days, you're going to actually call me by my name. No one else but me will hear it, though."

This is a very subtle, but very good point. He never calls her by her name, though I suspect that you have several ways to make it happen.

I absolutely love the gift Jayne got for River.


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Where the River Flows pt 3: The Evil That Men Can Do
Hey guys, I'm REALLY sorry it took so long to post this, but I just started my new work schedule right after I posted the last installment of Where the River Flows, so I've been too tired mostly to get on the puter. Anyways, this is basically after Jayne's capture, WARNING: Mild torture, some violence, and detailed gore (no blood and guts, but descriptions of violence-inflicted wounds). River, Mal and Zoe go in to save the day.

WHere the River Flows pt 2 - Whispers In the Dark
Hey guys! Part 2 of my Where the River Flows chapters. River wakes up, Jayne's in trouble, old enemies come back. Sorry, Silee fans, I love you and I'm one of you, but there's only Rayne sexin' in this chapter! Promise there will DEFINITELY be Silee lovin' in the epilogue. Got one more chapter to write before that! Again, guys, this is NC-17, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!

Where the River Flows
This is the next in my series guys!! This will be at LEAST a 2 parter, maybe 3, and there will probably be an epilogue. Jayne gets somethin' he didn't ask for, and he's the only one who can help River emotionally. (sounds kinda out there for Jayne, but I swear I'll make it work! lol) Again, this is NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!

Play Rough
WARNING: BONDAGE... DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE IN ANY WAY UPSET BY LEATHER, TYING DOWN, BLINDFOLDING OR MASSIVE PLEASURE!!! Okay to continue, this is the next story in my series, sorry it's so long, but it's that way for a good reason. Kaylee buys some new toys, River decides to borrow em. Again, this is NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!

You Give Love A Bad Name
YAY!! This fic takes place about a week after the last one. Simon's having a hard time adjusting to Jayne ruttin' his sister, but Kaylee finds a way to get his mind off it. Mal's gonna stab his ears if he has to hear his mechanic and his pilot gettin bedded by his medic and his mercenary again, and Zoe's finds somethin' to keep from bein' lonely. Also Mal/Inara starts steppin' up to the plate again ;) This is NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!

Sweet Little Sister (Psycho Love pt. 2)
Yay! The continuation of Psycho Love. Simon finds out Jayne's been beddin' his sweet little sister. Lots of sexin' lots of fightin' lots of fun! Rayne and Silee sex. Again, this is NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!

Psycho Love
Hey! Okay, since this story IS called "Psycho Love," It's mostly about Rayne. There will be a follow up in the next couple days called Sweet Little Sister (Psycho Love pt 2) because this one's short and kinda a cliffhanger. Again this is major NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!

Too Young To Fall In Love
Hey again guys, this is still S/K but MOST of it is Rayne (sorry for the detour, couldn't help myself, and trust me, it's hot!). There is definite sexin' here, especially between River and Jayne (this is when they finally get that chance in the spare shuttle mentioned in Don't Go Away Mad). Again, this is NC-17 guys, so be warned and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!!

Don't Go Away Mad
YAY another installment of my highly acclaimed S/K series! (okay I'm a moron lol) It's River's 18th birthday and Jayne gets her a special gift. As an additional warning, guys, this has some Rayne naughtiness (no actual sexin' quite yet) as well as Silee. Again, this is NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!

Hey again, this is a continuation of the series I've been postin' up here. River's gettin' eager, Jayne's confused as all hell, Simon's a bit flabbergasted, and Kaylee likes it when Simon goes all stiff. Again, this is NC-17 guys, so be warned, and enjoy the ensuing naughtiness!