Part Two

Tala never went to the infirmary to get her hand bandaged, even though she was fully aware she should have. She didn’t feel like chancing a run-in with Mal again, and Jayne had been giving her looks that made her uncomfortable. She started walking to her bunk, after wandering around the ship some. “Hey! Cargo!” She literally bit her tongue, trying not to lash out. She’s a guest on the ship, she kept reminding herself. She couldn’t let them have any reason to kick her off at the next Alliance port. She took a deep breath, and slowly turned around. Jayne was walking toward her, wiping down one of the largest guns Tala had ever seen. Her hand touched the metal of her own weapon, and she relaxed some. “I have a name.” She snapped at him. She couldn’t help it. “Oh, yeah?” Jayne thought on this a minute. “Well…what is’t?” “Tala.” She sighed. Kaylee had warned her Jayne was slow. She didn’t realize how slow. “Did you need something, because I would really rather be asleep right now.” She told him flatly. His attention piqued, and she crossed her arms across her chest, setting a boundary. “You can sleep in my bunk.” He suggested, trying for a flirty grin. The hungry look in his eyes made her uncomfortable- it was the same look he had been giving her the entire time. He was actually kind of cute, but the look bothered her. She had to create a fence. He had to know she wouldn’t throw herself at him. So, she decided to throw herself at him. She approached him slowly, making sure to swing her hips to keep his attention. She ran her finger down his chest. “You…”She said, in a whispy voice. He was struggling not to move. “You…” “Yea?” He asked, and she could feel him shudder. She loved this. It was too much fun to play with his little mind. She leaned in toward his ear and whispered. “You…WISH!” Confusion crossed his face, seemingly naturally at home there, and she shoved him away, turning around and walking toward the bunks. “But…wait! What about my bunk?” He asked. “Choo fay wuh suh leh!” Tala yelled over her shoulder. Over her dead body indeed. Jayne yelled after her, something about her changing her mind when she realized how “undenyably..uh..attractive” he was. “Shut up you babbling babboon.” Inara told him, and Tala laughed as she turned the corner to go downstairs to the bunks. She tiredly picked up her bag from the sofa and dragged her tired feet over to the first door on her right. Sleep. That’s all she wanted right now. She slid open the door and walked inside, dropping her things on the ground, and slipping off her shoes. She didn’t even bother to turn on the lights, she just rummaged through her bag to find the nightshirt she slept in. Finding it, she stripped off her shirt and pants, pulled down her wavy hair, and put on the nightshirt as she walked across the room. Her eyelids started to droop and she crawled into bed, sleeping on the farthest edge as she always had, in case she needed a quick reaction to something. Feeling safe, she started to drift off, and rolled over to face the wall, lifting her legs to curl into a ball. She ran into something. She screamed, leaping from the bed and plastering herself against the wall on the floor, at the opposite end of the room. “Wuh duh ma huh ta duh fung-kwong duh wai-shung doh!” Simon yelled, placing himself against his closest wall. “Dear God, what the hell are you doing in here?” Tala curled up, making sure her nightshirt fell over her knees and covered her ankles. “I…I…” She stuttered, wide eyed and still trembling from the shock. Her heart was slowing down. Mostly. He slept shirtless. She tried not to look at him, but how he spoke commanded her attention, and all of her training had taught her to look a man in the eye, to not be afraid. She wasn’t afraid. She was trying to be good, for once. It was silent for a moment as they both comprehended what had just occurred. “Okay…” Tala said, leaning over to pack her things. “I’m sorry…I thought the room was empty and-“ She looked up. He was staring at her. For a little while all she could do was stare back,then she broke eye contact. Avert your eyes! She thought. “I’ll go now.” “Um, okay.” He said. They both looked up as the door slid open. “I couldn’t help but hear a scream from….” Book stood in complete shock. “No!” Both Simon and Tala yelled to him. “It’s not-!“ “-what you think!” “We didn’t-!” “We haven’t-!” “Uh…I’ll…leave you two alone…” Uncomfortable, and having assumed things, the Shepherd closed the door again and disappeared into his own room. Tala, wide-eyed again, looked to Simon. “That’s bad.” “Bad? Bad? I haven’t been on this ship for twenty four hours and already he thinks we’re- that we- that I’ve-!” Tala blabbered, sinking to the floor again and burying her face in her knees. “But we didn’t, so…it’s okay.” “He doesn’t know that.” Tala muttered, almost incoherant. “Yes…well…we do. So…it’s okay.” She didn’t look up, but she could hear movement. A bit of shuffling, and then she heard him sit beside her. “This was an…interesting…experience.” He said. “So humiliating.” “Yes. Yes, it was.” He admitted. She looked up. He had put a shirt on and was looking at her. “But I think we won’t get anything other than, maybe, a lecture, and a few…significant glances.” “Great. That’s what I need.” The door slid open again and Tala shoved her head into her knees again. “Oh.” Tala braced herself. “River!” Simon stood quickly, brushing himself off as if he were brushing Tala away. Tala looked to the door and stood silently. “Hey, are you allright?” “The nightmares.” She said, nearly in tears, “They won’t go away. And I heard voices so….” River looked directly at Tala, and it gave her chills. This girl knew things. It was as if River could see directly through her, or was probing her mind. “The invited was invited…into your room?” She looked to Simon. He pulled her into the room and sat her on the bed. “No…it’s a long story mei mei, it doesn’t matter. Do the voices stop in here? Are they louder?” “They never go away, Simon.” River told him as if he should know. He sighed as if he should have. They started talking quietly, and Tala slipped silently from the room. She knocked on the next door, and poked the bed before she sat on it. Nothing. Thank goodness. *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

She opened her eyes and squeaked, jumping back. “You’re awake.” River said, having been so close to Tala they were probably breathing each other’s breath. “Um, yes.” Tala had had enough of faces being so close to her. “I’m awake now. What’s the matter?” “I know what you think.” River whispered. The hair on Tala’s arms raised. “I know what you feel. I know things I shouldn’t…” Tala sat in silence, curiosity overwhelming her fight or flight response. “I know that you’re afraid of me. But you’re curious. Do I interest you?” Tala nodded. Then a thought crossed her mind. Did River know what happened last night? River laughed, an ethereal sound. “Yes, I do.” She said, smiling. “Funny.” Is it possible for you to…get out of my head? Please? Tala thought. River’s smile disappeared. “I try.” She said quietly. “I can’t. I hear everything. I feel everything. It’s hard to discern myself from all the others…all the voices, all the thoughts…” She held her head and Tala reached out to push River’s hair from her face. River looked at her oddly. “What? Did I do something wrong?” Tala asked her, pulling her hand away quickly. River shook her head. “You aren’t afraid of me now…I don’t understand….” “You’re just a girl.” Tala told her quietly, and River sat back on the bed. “A girl who has some troubles…that’s all. You’re still a girl.” “I’m not a girl anymore. I’m not…normal.” “So?” Tala insisted. “You’re just…special now.” For a second, the disbelieving laugh that escaped River’s lips sounded normal. River seemed normal. She got quiet and looked as if she were listening to something. “Kaylee!” She cried out happily, and a knock came at the door. River rushed to answer it. Kaylee seemed surprised. Tala pushed the blanket down to her toes and pulled herself up against her pillows. “Oh, there you guys are.” She said as she walked in. Tala suddenly felt ashamed of the previous night. Nothing had happened, but…she had wanted it to, and she felt guilty. “All will be well…” River mumbled to her. “The sun will shine, and all will be well in a blue sky.” Neither Tala nor Kaylee had any idea what this meant, so they nodded, and dismissed it. River sighed and let it go. “Where did you go last night?” Tala asked Kaylee. “You disappeared.” “Had ta’ fix Serenity a bit. I put in the…” She thought a second. “part that she needed and stopped the noise. I had ta’ go finish fixin’ her.” Tala nodded, knowing that Kaylee had turned the jargon into the vernacular, something that Tala could understand. Tala’s stomach growled. “Oh, well, better letcha’ get dressed sos you can get some food.” “Yeah.” Tala said, unfolding herself and standing. Kaylee felt something odd was going on that she wasn’t privy to, but she dismissed it as her brain thinking too much. “C’mon River, let’s go play a game.” River smiled, standing and followed Kaylee out the door. She stopped, turning back around. “Tala?” She asked. Tala looked up. River took a second, and grinned broadly. “He likes you too.” And she skipped out the door. Tala smiled to herself and started to dress.

She walked into the galley where the captain and Jayne sat at the table, talking and eating their own breakfasts. Tala yawned and grabbed an apple and a drink. She sat down to silence. Mal and Jayne were both staring at her. Jayne with that hungry look. She switched seats to one farther away from him, and closer to the captain, who just looked amazed. “What? What is so interesting to you two?” Tala practically yelled. Wash, who had been passing by the doorway, stopped and turned. “Is that…a dress? You went from being Zoë’s twin to being Inara? Woah.” Tala looked down. It was only a summer dress, bright yellows and reds, light and flowy. “You forgot something, Wash.” Mal told him, pointing under the table. “No shoes.” “Okay…Zoë, Inara, and River? This is…weird.” “Well, if that’s how you’re gonna be!” Tala said laughing, and standing up. “I can be more than that…” Jayne mentioned. Mal gave him a disgusted look, and Tala rolled her eyes. “No!” She said forcefully. Jayne still didn’t get it. Idiot. “Jayne, if it didn’t work the first time, it’s not going to work after that.” Wash told him slowly, as if talking to a child. Jayne just looked at him, then turned his eyes back to Tala. She tried to ignore him. “I’m in my bare feet because I happen to like being able to move quietly. I’m in a dress because I felt like it, and I wore pants yesterday because I felt like it. Are you all just suddenly realizing I’m a girl?” “I knew’t!” “Shut up Jayne!” This came from all three, Tala, Mal, and Wash. Jayne looked hurt. “Is there something we should know about you?” Mal asked, implying that she had psychic abilities like River. She smiled mischeviously. All three men leaned forward for the answer, different thoughts running through each head. Mal wondered if she’d tell them who she was running from. Wash wondered if she had abilities like River, and after seeing her fight the way she had…she had to have some kind of abilities, right? Jayne wondered what her profession was. If he was lucky, he thought, she’d be like Saffron. Sort of. He wasn’t keen on missing weapons. They listened intently. “Yes.” She told them. “Don’t get in my way.” Smiling, she took her apple and cider and left the stunned galley in silence, headed toward her bunk where she could catch up on some reading. Juice ran down her chin as she bit into the fruit hungrily. She pulled her legs up and lay her head back against the wall, savoring the taste in her mouth and the silence around her. It had been so long since she could relax, since she’d found a place where they couldn’t find her, where she felt safe. She missed the safety of her mother’s arms. Her mother had been such a strong woman. Tala wished to be half as strong as her mother had been. She had only known her father briefly, so it was difficult for her to miss him as much as the rest of her family. She hated the Alliance and all that they stood for. She hated what they did to her father, to her mother, and her siblings. She hated that she couldn’t do anything to stop them. They had come, banging on her door, demanding entry. She hid in her room, the tender age of nine, always afraid of the stern soldiers that roamed the streets of her home on one of the central planets. She heard yelling, accusations and lies being sent back and forth between her parents and the soldiers. Then screams of pain, and a painful, eerie silence. They had come for her next, but she crept out the window and lowered herself to the ground, rushing around to the front. She flew through the open front door to find her family in pools of their own blood on the floor, their eyes open and staring. She couldn’t cry though. She couldn’t do anything but stand there. That is, until the soldiers started down the stairs to leave, assuming they had gotten the entire family. Tala had enough time to grab her mother’s long brown coat, and run as fast as she could to the train station. She had spent her entire life running. Running from the images that haunted her thoughts, and her dreams. Running from the soldiers that realized they were one death short. Running from the Alliance and her own blood. She was tired of running, Tala decided. She’d make a home for herself on the border planet, where it was quiet, and the Alliance rarely intervened. She could see a small home there, with a garden like her mother’s, and some friends that didn’t know who she really was. She’d finally be able to stop running, to stop hiding and fearing for her life. She could be a person again. She sighed at the thought, and how wonderful it would be. A knock came at her door. She opened her eyes and focused, wiping her chin with the back of her hand and beckoning for the visitor to come in. Shepherd Book opened the door and walked inside, closing the door behind him and staying as far from her as he could. She didn’t understand why. “Did you need something?” She asked, setting the apple down next to her. “I…” He thought a second, as if it were difficult to say. “I wanted to inquire as to your profession.” He said finally. Tala couldn’t help but laugh. It felt good to laugh, so light and carefree. She knew what he thought. “You think I’m a whore, using your ship for customers?” She asked, smiling still. “Well, not in those terms, but…” “I’m not.” She assured him, and she explained, roughly, what had happened the previous night when he had discovered her in Simon’s bedroom. He nodded, comprehension dawning on him. “Nothing happened, Shepherd. I’m not like that.” “I never said you were.” He told her quietly. He had such a passive manor, so quiet and reserved, but something else boiled beneath the surface. Someone else on the ship was not quite who they seemed to be. “It’s okay. I have no occupation. Not yet, anyway.” “So what have you done with your life?” He asked her, sitting on the farthest edge of her bed that he could without falling off completely. She found this amusing. He probably believed woman to be temptation, something to be wary of. “Nothing.” She decided to answer truthfully. He was a Shepherd, how could she not? “I’ve spent my whole life running from the Alliance.” “Oh my. What a life that is.” He shook his head sadly. “Is there anything you’d like me to do?” He pulled out his Bible and she held up a hand. “No, thank you. I lost religion when I lost my family.” She said quietly. He looked dejected. “I’m sorry to hear that.” He said. “Now, I don’t mean that you can’t pray for me. If you want to, by all means, have at it. I just don’t think that religion is for me anymore.” “Ah, yes well…I’ll be going then.” And he stood heading for the door, feeling satisfied he had at least given it a shot. “Shepherd?” He turned in silence. “Thank you.” She smiled to him, and he smiled a weak smile back. “You’re welcome, dear.” And he left her bunk, closing the door behind him. She felt a little lighter, like part of her life’s burden had been lifted. It felt nice, but it didn’t mean she was going to tell the ‘verse what happened to her and who she was. Not now, at least.