Music Of The Black
Wednesday, April 7, 2010

It's been too long since Kaylee's felt the music. And she's longing desperately to hear it again. But like all great music, she needs a composer. Her composer. Mal/Kaylee. Post-BDM. Oneshot. NC-17!


It had been a long day in the engine room of Serenity for Kaylee Frye. Ever since the Firefly class ship had returned to the air after its destructive crash landing during the battle above Mr. Universe's moon, Serenity had been very needy for Kaylee's constant attention. It was awful nice of those purple bellies to give them help in repairing the ship but they didn't know one gorram thing about how to care for a ship. For all their fancy parts and shiny tools, they didn't care one mite about the soul of the ship and how to keep it happy. They couldn't hear the music Serenity made.

It was during long days like this where she'd have lots of time by herself in the engine room that Kaylee would have plenty of time alone to think about stuff. Sometimes her thoughts would be preoccupied with stuff like what they'd have for dinner that night, something shiny she'd like to buy for herself when she gets her pay, how cute Simon looked that day and other trivial thoughts. But often her thoughts would drift to Mal and their past together. And that's what her thoughts were focused on this night.

Kaylee stopped her work for a moment and mopped off her brow with a greasy hand, leaving behind a large smudge on her forehead, and took some time to concentrate fully on her memories. It had started just after she'd come aboard the ship when she'd spend nights up late by herself, crying and homesick, having never been away from home before, let alone traveling the galaxy with no one she knew. The captain walked in on her one night and stayed up the rest of the night with her while she sobbed. He kept that up for nearly a fortnight, forgoing his own sleep to stay up with his mechanic and make sure she adjusted smoothly to the black.

Eventually Kaylee settled into life onboard Serenity and started to enjoy herself a lot more. But she was always thankful to Mal for what he did for her, not just giving her a job but also being friendly to her when she needed a friend more than ever before in her life. And one night she decided to try and seduce Mal to show her gratitude. Mal was reluctant at first to her advances but after a few nights, Mal finally caved and gave in.

When they were together, Mal was like a tortured composer and Kaylee his grand symphony. He would try over and over to get it just right but never seemed satisfied with the outcome. His talented hands and fingers and mouth and tongue would create music that would make any composer proud but it was never what Mal was looking for. Kaylee was more than willing to play along and submit herself to Mal's genius but it never seemed to fulfill him. He still had too many demons from the war to battle with, keeping the music he sought in his head. And after a few weeks like this, they parted amicably with no ill feelings between them.

Time passed and Mal would periodically call upon Kaylee to try just one more time to get it right but it never panned out. Eventually, they took on a new crew member in the Companion, Inara and Mal's focus turned to her. A few months later, the doctor, Simon, came aboard and left Kaylee smitten and so the two of them focused on new challenges for the next year or so and Kaylee and Mal settled into a more traditional friendship. They periodically had small scraps but they'd always be quickly forgiven. And Mal would still go out of his way to try and treat Kaylee extra special. Even though they didn't have the same relationship with each other anymore, Kaylee couldn't help having a grand time at the fancy ball on Persephone with Mal as his unofficial date. A few months later, she also took a special joy in seeing Mal nude one more time after Mal'd been duped by the thief, Saffron, who'd stranded Mal alone in the desert without his clothes.

Ultimately, Mal was unsuccessful with Inara but didn't seem too distressed over the fact while Kaylee after much time invested finally was able to win Simon's affection. But Simon was certainly not a musician on Mal's level. He was more like a novice child, clumsily banging away on a piano just trying to make noise. Kaylee was now the one feeling unfulfilled because Simon didn't know how to maximize her potential. Mal had treated her like his greatest work and painstakingly analyzed every note. Simon just played scales, going through the familiar motions, never trying to make music. And now Kaylee could feel herself longing to feel the music from Mal once more.

Kaylee finally decided to call it a night and started packing up her tools. Everyone on board had long since been to bed but Kaylee had remained hard at work. She unzipped her coveralls and pulled the top half off her sweaty and greasy body, trying to get a little relief from the sweltering heat of the room. She reached for a rag to wipe her oily hands off on when she suddenly felt something gently wrap her up from behind and press against her body which was now clad only in a stringy tanktop. The familiarity of the touch sent goosebumps rocketing over her skin while she was enveloped by a pair of strong, bare arms.

"G'morning Cap'n," mumbled Kaylee with a small yawn.

"What're you doin' up at this hour Kaylee? You should be in bed mei-mei," said Mal, a small hint of concern in his voice.

"Just been trying to get Serenity ship-shape again, Cap'n. Still not running like she used to just yet."

"I'm sure she'll come around soon. I appreciate your effort but I'd prefer a well-rested mechanic getting the job done a few days later rather than a broken down, exhausted mechanic breaking her back to get everything fixed as soon as possible."

"Whatever you say, Cap'n." Kaylee slurred slightly, letting herself enjoy Mal's touch more than she ought to have. She could tell he was shirtless at the moment as she could feel the skin of his chest on the parts of her back her tanktop exposed. Even though it was just a simple hug, Mal's touch still made her feel more than any of Simon's. His fingers lightly stroked and caressed her stomach and ribs, like an orchestra tuning up before the big concert. Kaylee started to sway a bit into the hug, smiling serenely at how good it felt just to be in Mal's arms again.

"What're you doing up at this hour?" questioned Kaylee innocently.

"Wanted a cuppa tea. Couldn't sleep none."

"Again? Captain, you haven't done much sleeping since we got back in the air. What's up?"

"I dunno, just got a lot on my mind," sighed Mal, still holding Kaylee in his embrace.

"Anything you wanna talk about?"

"Just thinking back to that battle and how things ain't been the same without Wash around."

"Yeah, I miss him a lot too." Kaylee slowly started to tear up a bit like anytime Wash was brought up. In public, Zoë had maintained a calm, cool demeanor when that subject got brought up but Kaylee showed enough emotion and heartbreak for both of them and damn near the rest of the crew too. The music was a steady, painful dirge in the days and weeks following his sudden death.

"I feel so bad for Zoë, having to watch her husband get murdered like that." Kaylee said with a small shudder of sadness in her voice.

"Yeah, that shook her bad. But what I can't stop thinking about is what would've happened if we'd lost anyone else in that battle. Losing Wash was bad enough; losing someone like Zoë or River or you especially on top of it would have been that much worse."

Kaylee paused for a second, replaying Mal's words in her head.

"Me, Cap'n?" she asked, looking up at his face to see his head bowed and his eyes closed, a troubled look on his face.

"Yeah, you. I dunno what I'd do without you Kaylee, darlin'. It wouldn't be a pretty sight, that's for damn sure. But too often lately, I've had to see you laid up with holes in you where they ain't oughta be. And that shouldn't happen. You mean too gorram much to me to lose," Mal stated seriously.

"Gosh Cap'n, that's probably the nicest thing you've ever said to me," replied Kaylee, smiling bright enough to light up the entire 'verse. "Better watch out or I might think you were getting sweet on me."

Mal didn't reply right away and slowly Kaylee's smile faded. Something was clearly causing Mal a good deal of conflict. Kaylee knew probably better than anyone how to handle this and just waited for Mal to do something. She knew he'd come out with it eventually; he just needed to do it on his own and not have her prying around trying to coax it out of him. So she waited for him to say or do something while enjoying the closeness of him. Without warning, Mal backed out of the embrace, slowly spun Kaylee around and planted a kiss on her surprised lips. The suddenness of the kiss stunned Kaylee and although she longed to stay in it, her girlfriend instincts dragged her away from it and broke the kiss.

"Mal, what are you doing? Are you out of your mind?" asked Kaylee fearfully. Surely there was no chance Simon was out at this time of night but the fear of him walking in on such a moment was overpowering Kaylee's logic at the moment.

"I'm sorry Kaylee, I really am," Mal groaned, pressing his hands to his forehead in shame. "I shouldn't have done that. I'm sorry."

"Well...why did you?"

"I just needed to again. That's what I've been thinking about all these nights. I don't want to miss out on good things anymore. Watching Wash die made me realize how quickly life can change and how it can end even quicker. Zoë told me that even though he left, she didn't regret anything about being with Wash because for awhile in her life, she had someone. And I don't wanna go through the rest of my life being scared of being with someone only to lose them like Zoë lost Wash."

"When I stepped off that elevator," Mal continued, "and I saw you on the ground with those darts in your neck, it made me think about how easily I could have lost you too. And that's the thought that's been keeping me up all this time. If I'd have lost you after letting you get away, it would have gorram near killed me I expect. I don't wanna let you get away. I truly want to be with you Kaylee."

A heavy silence followed Mal's speech. Kaylee stood stock-still in front of him, eyes wide, mouth slightly open in surprise, trying to process what Mal had just dumped upon her. On one hand she was ecstatic at this new development but reality kept her grounded with the knowledge that she was supposed to be with Simon now. The whole time Mal stood in front of her, nervously looking at the ground, chewing on his lip, looking like a schoolboy who'd just asked his crush to the prom and was now awaiting her response.

"Why are you telling me this Mal?"

"Because I felt you needed to know. For all we know, you could die tonight in your sleep and if I'd have not told you that, I would've regretted it for the rest of my life."

"Well what exactly do you expect me to do now?" Kaylee asked acidly, letting the steady crescendo of the percussion overtake her and build up her anger. "I'm with Simon now, Mal. I'm certainly glad for you that you've decided you're mature enough to be able to handle a relationship but I can't be that for you anymore. I hope you find someone Cap'n, I really do. But it's not gonna be me. Simon is too good a man for me to turn my back on. He makes me happy and...and..."

Kaylee couldn't go on anymore and burst into tears, crumbling slowly to the floor of the engine room. Sure, she was very overtired at this point so her emotions weren't exactly stable but she just couldn't continue the façade and lying to herself about Simon any longer. She knew she wasn't happy with him and she tried to keep the fake smile on for as long as she could but it was too much of a burden to keep up any longer and she finally cracked.

Mal had been sent slightly reeling at her sudden harsh words for him so he was very tentative when he crouched down next to her after he saw her break down out of nowhere. Something was clearly not right with her right now and he didn't want to set off any more unpleasantness tonight.

"Kaylee?" Mal asked hesitantly.

Without giving him any warning, Kaylee suddenly launched herself onto Mal and kissed him over and over feverishly. Mal's eyes got wide as he suddenly found himself on the ground with Kaylee on top of him, a little scared at this point of what Kaylee would do next. He slowly decided he didn't care right then and started kissing her back but just as quickly as she started kissing him, she stopped again and opted for hugging him tight while sobbing into his chest.

"Um...Kaylee...can you please stop trying to break my ribs?" Mal gasped out as Kaylee bearhugged his midsection. Kaylee eased up and sat back up, starting to calm herself down. Mal gently massaged his abdomen after Kaylee's assault of affection. "I think I'm gonna head back to bed now," said Mal.

"No, wait, don't go Cap'n. Not yet." Kaylee took a deep steadying breath and looked at Mal seriously. "I'm sorry. This is all just a big shock to me is all. I mean you don't know much I've been hoping to hear you tell me that. And when you finally do I just suddenly go berserk on you. You didn't deserve that. I hope you can forgive me."

"Of course darling. That all you wanted to say?"

"Well, no, not exactly. I just...I just want you to know that I am very happy you told me that and that I would love to have the chance to be with you again. But I don't wanna hurt Simon none. He might not be the guy I was hoping for but he still doesn't deserve me just leaving him for you."

"So wait a moment now, you're not really happy with him?" a thunderstruck Mal questioned. Kaylee sadly shook her head.

"I mean I can tell he's tryin and all but he just can't seem to get it right. He hasn't come close to satisfying me any. And he's always real busy fussing over River and fixing all of us so we don't get to be together that much anyway. But when we are together...I just don't feel it. Not like I did when I was with you anyway."

Kaylee hugged her knees to her chest, looking quite vulnerable after letting the truth out finally. Mal finally sat down next to her and put a comforting arm around her shoulder. She leaned into him and nuzzled her face into the space between his shoulder and neck that always felt so right, almost like it was made just for her.

"I think it's best you break it off with him then Kaylee. I mean what good will it do to keep stringing him along like this when you're not feeling satisfied? He's bound to realize it at some point and I reckon he won't be too pleased with you not being honest with him. Just doesn't seem like the polite thing to do to me."

Kaylee distractedly pushed a strand of her sweaty, golden hair behind her ear as she contemplated what Mal told her. She knew damn well that if their roles were reversed, she'd want Simon to tell her outright and not just pretend to be happy for her sake. She never liked it when guys did that and couldn't imagine it would feel any different to Simon.

"I guess you're right. But what do I do after that?"

Mal didn't bother answering and instead cupped her chin with his free hand. When she looked up at him with her big, shining eyes, Mal didn't hesitate and kissed her once more. Kaylee did hesitate, however, still unsure of what to do but after a moment, finally melted into Mal's kiss and returned it. For several minutes, they stayed like that, re-discovering each other while at the same time letting new parts of themselves be discovered.

Kaylee felt the need to come up for air first and she reluctantly broke the kiss, panting as if she'd run a marathon while she rested her forehead against Mal's. While she regained her wind, the two just gazed at each other, watching each other's eyes dance and shine. Already Kaylee could feel new music beginning, the low, soft notes of the introduction playing slowly in her mind.


Kaylee moved in this time and placed small kisses all along Mal's cheek as she reached up and entwined her fingers in his hair. Mal closed his eyes and trailed his hand across her cheek and her neck, drawing small whimpers from her. Slowly his hand traveled down her neck to her collarbone, down to her shoulder and arm and finally, jumping over to her abdomen which he caressed with a delicate touch. More instruments began joining in with long legato notes, flowing seamlessly from one onto the next. As Mal slipped his hand under her shirt and felt bare flesh, the entire orchestra joined in and the introduction concluded.


Mal's hand smoothly snaked all over Kaylee's midsection. Starting on her ribs and moving up her side before sliding over to her bare back, gliding down once more until his fingertips brushed her panties and then all the way across her waistband to her front and then back up to her stomach. Kaylee breathed hard, unable to keep her mind focused any longer on kissing Mal as his touch swept over her and sent pulses of electricity all through her body. Mal's hand continued up Kaylee's front, right up her breastbone until his hand escaped her shirt through the top and he softly stroked her larynx before diving back down underneath the fabric where he soon came to a rest on her breast.

Kaylee stiffened and let out a small moan while Mal's fingers danced over her flesh. She started to let her hands wander as well, raking them all across Mal's bare chest and arms. Delicately she came across all of Mal's various scars that he'd acquired through his travels. She also started once again with kisses and lovingly bathed his collarbone and neck with tender nips, playful little staccato notes that helped move the tempo along.


The intensity began building as their foreplay began bleeding over into more intimate touching. Mal tugged Kaylee out of her coveralls, leaving her in just her shirt and panties. She was already damp from the strenuous work of the day but quickly new fluids were starting to flow. Once she was free of her coveralls, Kaylee dove into Mal's lips for another kiss, this one with no restraint and overpowering with lust and passion. Mal returned her kisses with ones that matched her intensity, finally free of his burden of being without her. They paused for a brief moment while Mal removed Kaylee's shirt, leaving the both of them topless before resuming their impassioned kissing.

Mal grew greedy for more of her and his hand came to her buttocks. He squeezed them firmly, drawing a fresh, satisfied moan from Kaylee before moving his hand over to her groin and started casually drumming his fingers along the thin fabric. This was where Mal always proved his talent as he gently probed and stroked the areas he knew she was most receptive when she was bare before him. It was a small tease that always drove Kaylee mad with lust. His fingers danced over her, beating out a complicated piano solo on her blue panties dotted with yellow polka dots. He was a master at this part, never skipping a note, never dropping his tempo. It was like he was showing off and the conductor was holding the orchestra on an extended rest while the pianist got his time in the spotlight.

"Wo de mah, Mal, you're driving me nuts here. Please touch me," gasped and whimpered Kaylee. Mal was only too happy to oblige and quickly discarded of her panties, leaving Kaylee naked before him. It had been awhile since Mal had the honor of seeing Kaylee stripped bare before him and Mal took a small moment to admire her beauty which had only increased in the year or so since their last encounter. Before she could protest again, Mal was back down, lightly stroking his fingers across her most delicate folds.

Kaylee wrapped her arms around Mal's neck and breathed heavily into her chest, her gaze becoming cloudy and unfocused as Mal worked his magic. Mal then surprised her by wrapping his mouth around her breast and feverishly licking her erect nipple. Kaylee cried out as Mal's tongue worked over her soft nub, brashly sounding off with a heroic fanfare. Meanwhile his fingers continued their diligent examination of her most private of areas, leaving no micrometer untouched. Kaylee had to restrain from crying out more because she didn't want to cause a disturbance and wake the entire ship.

Mal didn't help matters on that front as he dipped his forefinger down and smoothly slid it inside her. Kaylee bit down on her lip hard, resisting as hard as she could from screaming Mal's name into the heavens. Slowly Mal probed about inside her, once again making sure he left no parts unaccounted for as he probed her, sliding seamlessly from one note to the next with one motion like the trombone. He eventually added a second finger, only increasing the pressure. Kaylee felt her release start to slowly build within her and Mal slowly built her to a fever pitch before Kaylee finally stopped him, not wanting the song to be over yet but wanting to start a new movement.

"I need you right now. Please, I need you inside me," begged Kaylee, nearly out of breath. Mal released his mouth from her breast as she moved her shaking hands down to his sleep pants and clumsily got them off. She laid back on the floor of the engine room, where Mal had first met her years ago and opened herself up to him. Mal casually positioned himself between her and didn't bother with the teasing this time, having had enough playing around and wanting desperately his own release as well. Smoothly he slid his way inside Kaylee who sighed appreciatively every inch of the way. He finally reached as far in as he could get and held himself inside her for an extended fermata.


Mal slowly began rocking in and out of Kaylee, providing a steady melody. Kaylee responded with her own countermelody, rising herself up to meet him every time he thrust back inside her. They continued on like this, melody and countermelody, dueling with each other in sweet harmonic bliss. The chorus rang out in strong voice through Kaylee's appreciative moans, adding more color to the music as they rampaged on towards the climax.

"Oh, yes, yes, yes! Oh god," Kaylee chirped out as their pace continued to quicken. Her hands meandered aimlessly all over Mal, trying to feel as much of him as she could all at once. The music kept accelerating; getting louder and more frantic with every measure. Kaylee was in a fog and was completely detached from reality at this point, leaving the engine room, the ship and the universe all together. It was just her and Mal flying through time, caught in their own whirlwind of music.

Prestissimo con fuoco.

The harmony was gone now and both bodies simply threw themselves at each other with no abandon. Sweat glistened off their bodies while they continued on and on with their lovemaking, their attention completely devoted to the moment and nothing else. Both lovers were near their breaking point and put every last bit of their body and soul into their thrusting, which was becoming increasingly erratic and disjointed with every second as they both lost their handle on technique, choosing to let the passion drive them the final few measures.

The triumphant final chords sang out as Mal reached his apex first, climaxing with a mighty groan as his orgasm ripped through him and sent wave after wave of his semen gushing into Kaylee. She followed right behind with her own release, screaming at the top of her voice as she was pounded repeatedly with ecstasy, leaving her helpless and breathless from the effort. The conductor released the final note. The audience roared with cheers and applause. The orchestra stood up to take a bow.


Mal and Kaylee remained inside each other for the next several minutes, clutching onto each other like they were both the last strands of sanity left in their minds. Slowly their heartbeats normalized and their breaths became full again as the audience continued its ovation. Kaylee slid her foot along the floor of the engine room, making sure she was still experiencing gravity for the power of Mal's lovemaking left her feeling like she was just floating on a cloud now.

"Can you hear it Cap'n?" Kaylee whispered softly.

"Hear what bao bei?"

"The music."

"What music?"

"That we just made. Did you feel it too?"

Mal pondered that a second, replaying what just happened in his head, trying to get a grasp on what he was feeling as it was going on.

"You know something? I think I did feel it," replied Mal, smiling warmly down at her and giving her a tiny, near-chaste kiss.

"I've always felt it with you and never with anyone else. I want to keep feeling it. I want to be with you Mal. Not with Simon, not with anyone else, just you. Just you," cried Kaylee softly as happy tears leaked from her eyes while she hugged Mal tightly.

"You can be. I want you to be. I want you to hear that music forever Kaylee." Mal softly petted her hair and kissed her temple, trying to assure her as much as possible that he meant it. Kaylee didn't respond again and merely kept crying happily in his arms, overjoyed that this was now her embrace forever and ever. Mal closed his eyes and smiled; he finally got his masterpiece.



mei-mei: "little sister"

wo de mah: "mother of God"

bao bei: "sweetheart"



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