I did not create these two, I just gave em the method to drown their sorrows. All creation must be left up to Joss.

Washie hun, thanks for your help, love your comments as always. Eric Sardinas, once again thanks for the title, I know people out there know what its like to be where Mal and Simon, so I thought what better than to write a chapter named after a blues song. Whimsi, thanks to you as well for the comments and such. It was instrumental in me writing this chapter

Down to Whisky

Simon sat in a far corner of the cargo bay on one of the large packing crates the crew were hauling to Boros. He didn’t know how long he had been sitting there, he figured it ad been a while. Still he needed space, and where better than one of the corners he had found River one day crying. This was before her marked upturn since his recent breakthrough with medication.

Simon sighed, all that seemed to be a pallid sepia tone nice to the less than shiny mood he was in. He tried to replay the events in his mind about how he had been led to this juncture of needing a little peace and quiet…sadly as he well knew shocking events were never clear in recollection. He likened it to one of his first months as an intern on Osiris, when a deranged patent had hit him while he attempted to sedate the man, causing Simon to accidentally sedate himself. His memory of that event was not clear, his consolation was that he could explain in detail why his memory was fuzzy that time…for this, he had little.

Simon's thoughts were gate crashed by the sound of a pair of boots on the gangplank walking in a crisp stride. He shrugged it off, it was probably Mal prowling the decks as he often did in the afternoons. Simon supposed that’s what you did when you were captain. Simon looked at a small weld seam in the wall to the right of him; lost in contemplation, he failed to register Mal’s somewhat imposing presence till the captain cleared his throat.

"Book wondered if I might find you in a corner somewhere." His voice deadpan, carrying no hint of anything.

"What’s happened…is someone hurt?" Simon's mind jumped straight to the worst case scenario.

"No no…nothing save a couple bruised egos…maybe a heart or two needs mendin’." Mal said this in a tone Simon hadn’t come across in the proud captain; he was however quick enough to pick up on the notion behind his tone. Mal had opened up a little, Simon knew enough about the man to know that this was quite clearly a ‘not to be discussed with anyone’ statement.

"Oh…I see." Simon replied, though he didn't understand fully what he was seeing, just yet. Mal nodded, then motioned for Simon to follow him. "Where…what…I mean…" Simon trailed off. Mal just nodded in the direction of the crews quarters, the young doctor had enough sense to shut up and follow Malcolm. 'To hell with it', he thought, 'Can't be any worse than how I feel.'

…

Simon had never been in Mal’s quarters. He’d never really had the desire to go into Mal’s room, he and his sister had their room and he paid for the fare by patching up the crew and occasionally helping out on jobs. The doctor had never really considered what exactly Mal’s quarters would look like, but here he was. They were tidy, very neat, everything in its proper place. The captain had limited ornaments, pictures and what-have-yous, but what he did have fit him perfectly. Simon wondered if this is what a career bachelor’s quarters would look like.

The doctor noticed a couple of pictures of him and Kaylee at a fair somewhere, and to his surprise Mal actually looked like he was enjoying himself. Indeed, there was even a picture of he and Wash at the pilot and Zoë’s wedding enjoying themselves. Simon almost couldn’t process this, more so he knew he couldn’t process why it was that Mal had brought him down to such…well hallowed ground.

Simon could only stare somewhat open mouthed at the two glasses and the two bottles of blended whisky that sat in the middle of the small table, ceremoniously placed in the middle of the room.

"Well?" Mal eyed Simon with a measure of incredulity; ironically Simon’s expression was somewhat of a well mannered clone.

"Just…ah…a little surprised I guess." Mal half smiled.

"Man's gotta’ have some secrets…he’s also gotta’ know when things are better shared." Mal’s tone had taken on something of a friendlyish quality, it was probably more out of mutual respect for the current situation, but still. One thing the young doctor had to give him credit for was his courtesy.

The two sat down at the table and Mal popped the top of the bottle, pouring the first of many. "Won these while we were land bound a couple months back…the guy sure was sorry to em’ it go." Mal chuckled at this, turning one of the bottles to Simon so he could read the label. Simon just about fell over. The bottle's well worn label was green and all that could be made out was the gold outline of a man in a hat caring a cane.

"This…this must be-"

"Last bottles before the brewery was shut down damn near ninety years ago."

"I…ah…thanks Mal."

"Figured now was as good a time as any to open it…hard times call for something good at least."

The two men sat back, swirling their whisky. Mal took a hefty gulp then looked at Simon. The younger man got the notion that this was not just a quiet drink, so matched him, and raised him the whole glass. He reclined sucking in as he did, placing the glass down on the table with a solid ‘thunk’.

"Well!..." Mal smiled wryly. "Guess Jayne owes me thirty bits then…"

"Why's that?"

"He reckons you would drink like a sissy…guess he was wrong." Mal downed his own then filled them up again.

"Nice to know I’m a source of such amusement." Simon felt once again on the defensive with Mal.

"Oh, come on now…nothing meant by it. Besides time for makin' fun of you is past. You’re a part of the crew now…" Mal let it hang, taking another gulp of his whisky.

"Uh…thanks I guess…" Simon didn’t quite know how to respond, so thought better of saying anything more, deciding instead to drink. The two sat on, finishing another glass each in record time, this was not so much a social drink as it was more what was called for. As the third glass slid across the table and he felt a little looser thanks to the alcohol, Simon raised his glass.

"A toast perhaps…" Mal nodded. "To sorrow and misery at the ass end of the universe." Mal smiled.

"And how boy…here was us all fooled into thinking you had a silver tongue." Mal stared at the wall at right angles to Simon. "Must say…felt a mite like a damn fool…"

"I just wish I’d taken River's advice…" Simon took another drink.

"What’s that?" Mal said, not looking at him.

"And I quote: ‘stop thinking, Simon and do something you boob!’"

"Sharp girl that…" Mal finished his third then looked to Simon who had already finished.

"She had gone on for months about me saying something to her, then she stopped quite abruptly…" Simon looked down into his now full glass.

"Thing I don’t understand is how it happened and I didn’t know bout it…" Mal shook his head. "I mean…I practically know everything that goes on, on this boat…hell I knew about you and your fixation on young Kaylee by the second week you was on board…"

"Well it is a small ship…what I wanna know is how River knew…"

"Women boy…faster than any communication system in the verse." Mal took another gulp, letting out a slight hiss as the violent liquid hit his stomach like battery acid.

"I dunno…" Simon drank, feeling the impending numbness of intoxication. "I can't help but feel Kaylee didn’t talk about this…" Simon looked to Mal, the older man shrugged.

"Thing I don’t know is why them two…I mean, hell I’m happy Kaylee’s happy, cute little darlin’ like that deserves it…but them two…" Mal bottomed out his glass, Simon did the same. He refilled them, then looked at the younger man.

"We need music…" Simon nodded, Mal got up and foraged at the small computer screen. The sound of a slide player filled the room, Simon nodded, hurting music if ever there was any…aside from maybe vintage hick, but that would just be criminal.

"It's strange…I know they were good friends…it's just…" Simon trailed off, feeling the alcohol.

"I know. I mean like I was saying before, Kaylee’s a sweet girl and deserves to be happy…but I figured you an her…" Simon looked at Mal as he said this, feeling that this perhaps was one of the few times Mal would ever compliment him. "Well…you’d make a fine couple. Couple hours ago it woulda’ made sense for me to walk in on you two in the engine room, stead of us two sittin’ here in sorrow's kitchen…" Mal shook his head.

"I mean…Inara…she’s a companion…I thought she and…" Simon said to the other man. Mal looked at him, the effects of intoxication creeping over his face. "Well you know…you have this whole school yard thing." Simon reeled thinking he had just attracted a volley of abuse reserved for people like Jayne…and even Inara in a way.

"Hell…aint that the truth! I mean … hell I shoulda known when she didn’t argue so much with me…" Mal shook his head, drank some more, Simon joining him, surprised to find Mal strangely open. The young doctor felt surprisingly more relaxed. "It's a mystery Simon…that’s what it is…"

"Mystery…I’m not sure I uh…understand." Simon was starting to feel more and more drunk as time wore on, he wondered if Mal was feeling the same.

"Women…especially Inara. Wuo de ma, she is…she is something…"

"Humm…I…see…I always thought Kaylee was so…I dunno, more up front."

"She is boy…you didn’t take your sister's advice fast enough I guess." "Well…I mean, you could have done something too? I mean hey, I’m not the only one here who blew it."

"Sure, all I’m tying to tell you is that Kaylee is more upfront…but she has mystery too…"

"Like?"

"Like why the hell she chose Inara over you…ya see what I'm sayin’ boy?"

"I guess…" Simon finished up, and motioned for another, Mal obliged pouring himself another too. "I…don’t know… maybe I’m doomed…"

"It hurts boy…I know it does. Hell only reason I’m not as downsome as you is cos I guess I’m used to it…disappointment teaches ya a thing or two."

"Oh…and whass that?" Simon noticed his own slight slur, and Mal noticed it too, laughing.

"Well…desensitises ya’ to disappointment is what I shoulda said. Besides you're young…you got years ahead ta find some nice girl!" Mal’s arm shot out like a flailing fish, waving about furiously, to emphasis the point.

"Easy for you to say…you could still go back and find Saffron." Simon shot this quietly. Mal laughed too, shot him a dirty look, causing him to stop that train of thought. Mal laughed again.

"Maybe I was wrong bout you Simon…could be your not such a dead weight, no sense of humour, rich kid after all."

"Maybe you're not such the jerk I thought you were when River and I came aboard."

"You thought I was a jerk…you little shit…" Mal laughed, Simon laughed, each laughing harder because of the other's cackling. The sound clattered off the steel roof like rain on a tin shed, not that the two men noticed in the intoxicated haze.

"There you go ya’ fool…you at least got a woman in your life…" Mal kept laughing.

"River?"

"She may be a little whimsical in the brain pan…" Mal gestured with a limp wrist to his temple. Simon could only laugh, months of stress slipping off him. Simon finished his whisky catching up with Mal who was long since done. So the ritual ensued, Mal pouring this time.

"Oh…well, at least I lost to a woman like Inara. Suppose its not all bad…"

"You mean I lost to a five six mechanic…" Mal filled his voice with over-the-top sarcasm. They both laughed, so hard that it took them a couple of minutes to regain some kind of composure.

"You're right though…must be said… least we lost to a decent person. To Kaylee and ‘Nara." The two men toasted, the second of many. Simon was dimly aware that this was probably going to be an all night affair, still, it beat lamenting to River who would merely remind him he should have acted sooner.

"To Kaylee and Inara." Simon chorused. They clinked their glasses together, then drank deeply. Both sitting back with a satisfied ‘ahh’. They sat in silence for a long while sipping on the whisky.

"Ya know something my mum always used to say, I never got it till now." Mal said looking out into the near distance.

"What’s that?"

"She always used to say…given time, they will always choose pearls before swine… guess we'll just have to give it time boy…" Mal raised his glass, a signal for Simon to drink.

"I guess we just give it time then…I guess we just give it time." Simon took another gulp of whisky, dimly aware of its acidic bite. He sighed, knowing he was going to feel like go se tomorrow. Still it was a small price to pay to forget his troubles for a night. Leave reality for tomorrow…Simon took another big gulp. One of many, he thought, one of many…