BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL

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Destined Chapter 19
Wednesday, February 15, 2006

River/Jayne


CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 1329    RATING: 9    SERIES: FIREFLY

CHAPTER 19

2 WEEKS LATER

"You look worried." Book remarks as he joins Jayne on the catwalk as the mercenary watches River with the baby on the cargo bay floor.

"She's just... actin weirder than normal." Jayne remarks

"She has been quiet." Book agrees "But this is River."

Jayne chuckles

"Should be glad she's this calm." Book states

"I am... its just you know every time she's calm... somethin happens. Either pullin a prank on me... or someone else. Or somethin worse happens."

Book chuckles "She does tend to find trouble after a few days of good behavior."

"Guess I'm gettin used to it." Jayne shrugs

River smiles at Charlie, enjoying the baby's happy thoughts, 'Going to miss this.' She trails her finger down Charlie's plump cheek, 'Be good for your Daddy and Uncle Simon. And Uncle Captain Daddy... Auntie Inara... Aunt Kaylee... Uncle Book and Uncle Wash... And Aunt Zoë.' She smiles as the baby squeezes her finger. 'Your Daddy loves you so much. He is going to take good care of you. He is going to protect you, teach you lots of things he shouldn't but lots of things he should. Everyone will teach you so much.' She rests her cheek against Charlie's head, 'Doing this to protect you my sweet baby. Won't let them hurt you or the rest of them.' She smiles at the image that flashes through her mind. "Here" she reaches for the rattle handing it to the baby who starts shaking it and laughing. River laughs at her daughter's happiness, 'Going to miss that sound.'

"Someone's happy." Jayne remarks as he crouches beside them.

"Loves her rattle. She likes noise it takes her mind off her mind."

"Makes her smile." Jayne remarks

"Want her always happy."

"She will." Jayne sits beside River.

"Promise?"

"Promise." Jayne looks at River "You shiny crazy girl?"

River smiles at him, "As much as a crazy girl can be." She looks at Charlie who is sucking on her fist. 'I love you Charlie.' She kisses Charlie's head.

Jayne watches River cuddle the baby.

'I love you and your Daddy so much. I have to keep you safe, even if it means going back there.' River rests her cheek against Charlie's head, 'I would rather be dead than go back' she flinches hearing the baby whimper, 'but it would hurt you and everyone else... can't do it. Can't hurt you.'

THAT NIGHT

River stares at dreaming Jayne then leans down kissing his cheek, "I love you." She whispers, "This is for the best." She stands walking over to the crib looking at Charlie who is awake. "I'm sorry." She says sadly. "Can't let you be caught in this." She looks at Jayne sadly, "Be good for him Charlie." She quietly walks out of the bunk leaving her daughter lying there sucking on her fist. River walks the catwalk trailing her fingers over the railing. 'Be good for them Serenity, protect them like I'm trying. Wash and Kaylee will take good care of you.' She closes her eyes her mind drifting to the others all lost in their dreams. She drifts into each mind stopping in Simon's.

< "Swear Simon... swear no matter what you won't take Charlie from Jayne."

"River..."

"He loves her so much Simon. She loves him. It would break him to lose both of us... just as it would break you if he took her away from you."

"What are you talking about?" Simon demands "Mei-mei..." Simon says worried.

"I love Jayne... I love you. I'm doing what is best for everyone Simon. They'll keep coming for you... but not as hard."

"River"

River hugs Simon, "Love you Simon."

"I love you mei-mei." >

She flashes through Book and Zoë's minds saying her good byes.

< "I know you have secrets... I know your mind is the most puzzling of them all." River leans against the dream console looking at Wash. "If you and Zoë are to last... tell."

"River"

"Thank you Wash. For being so kind. Teach her to fly for me?"

Wash nods >

River goes to the next mind smiling at Kaylee's happiness.

< Kaylee stares at River, "What is it?"

"Take care of Simon for me."

"River... why do I feel like you are sayin bye?"

"I am. I have too." River steps up to Kaylee taking her friend's face between her hands, "He's a boob... but he's coming around."

"He is." Kaylee smiles >

River leans against the wall fighting tears as she heads to the next mind.

< Inara looks up surprised to see River, "River..."

"Tell him. Let him know. Don't let him hurt you anymore."

Inara stares at the young woman, "What do you mean?"

"Know you hurt when he calls you names... tell him."

"He won't listen."

"You can try." River shrugs "Families argue... and they talk. Besides," River looks down playing with the hem of her shirt, "if you leave who is going to help Simon teach Charlie? Jayne, won't stop her from eating with her hands... won't care if she doesn't say please and thank you. If you stay you can back Simon... make sure Jayne doesn't push Simon away. Keep them in line. Be there when Kaylee gets mad at Simon. Or Simon gets flustered."

Inara nods "I will." >

River stands outside the bridge where Mal is dozing in the captain's chair and smiles as she prepares herself for the conversation she knows will be hard but needed.

< River sits on the table watching as Mal cleans his gun.

Mal looks up, "Huh... thought I was on the bridge."

"You are. Just... needed to talk to you. No one else can hear." River plays with the hem of her skirt.

"Since when can you do this?" Mal asks

River shrugs "Never did before. Didn't know if it would work."

"So is everyone... asleep?"

"Charlie's awake. I've said my goodbyes to everyone but you... and Jayne." She takes a deep breath, "Talking to you and Jayne is harder."

"Why me?" Mal asks

"Because you know... you understand. You get it."

"Get what?"

"That what was done can't be changed." River shrugs

Mal stares at her, "Your leavin."

River nods "Don't worry I will reactivate the shuttle beacon when I get where I'm going."

"You ain't leavin." Mal protests

"No choice Captain Daddy." River says sadly. "They won't stop. I see the possibilities... most of them lead to your deaths."

"You ain't gonna... I know you said you'd rather be dead..."

River shakes her head, "Can't. Would if I could. Can't."

"Why?"

"If I do... they come for Charlie." River stares at Mal, "Do me a favor?"

"What?"

"Keep them from fighting over Charlie. Don't let Simon take Charlie. Don't let Jayne take Charlie. You know Simon will suggest he take her off Serenity. You be their reason. If Simon takes Charlie off the ship... they won't be able to hide. Here... they keep moving. Stay a step ahead."

"River"

"I want Charlie here... where she's safe. Let her stay?"

Mal nods

"Don't let them fight over her. This is her family... where she belongs." River moves off the table and hugs Mal. "Take care of them... keep Jayne from killing Simon... and Simon from killing Jayne."

"Know I will. Can't have my hired gun dead or the Doc." Mal chuckles

"I need you to promise me something... if the day comes they send me after you... kill me before I kill you."

"But what if you come back not wantin to kill us?"

"You'll know."

"Why me?" Mal asks

"Its you or Zoë. Simon won't do it... Jayne... I don't think he could."

"If it has to be done... and Jayne can't... Zoë or I will... promise."

River nods "Love you Captain Daddy and thank you... for protecting me this long." >

River steps into the shuttle starting it up she pulls away from Serenity then looks at the ship that has been her home for almost three years. She takes a deep breath before giving into the last mind set.

< River looks at Jayne who is propped up looking down at her. She lifts her hand to his cheek.

"Why is this feelin different?" Jayne asks as he brushes her hair back.

"It is. Not all your dream."

"What do you mean?"

River tugs on his hand pulling him down.

Jayne settles over her and leans down kissing her lightly. "Mm like this dream"

River smiles then stops him before he goes any further, "Jayne"

"Gonna take advantage of this... dream baby girl. No havin to keep quiet... no wakin Charlie."

River flips Jayne to his back

"Mmm likin this"

"No. Talking now." River takes his face between her hands, "I need you to listen Jayne." She says firmly as she searches his eyes. "I'm sorry."

"For what baby?"

"For doing what I have done. What I could do... will possibly do in the future."

"River" Jayne finds himself silenced when she presses her finger to his lips

"Swear that no matter what happens you will protect Charlie."

"Know I will"

River tilts her head "Even if it means killing me one day?"

Jayne stares at her, "Ain't comin to that River girl." He says firmly as he sits up, "You're safe..."

"I'm gone."

"What do you mean?"

"I took the shuttle." She searches his eyes, "I'm going back to them."

"No. River, baby, your safe here... with us. You know I ain't gonna let them touch you."

River rests her forehead against Jayne's "Seen the outcomes Jayne... know the odds. You have better odds of surviving without me." She shrugs "Don't want Charlie to get hurt. Don't want her to hurt anyone... even them."

"River, don't do this... what about Charlie?" He demands. "She needs you... I need you."

"I need to do this, I can't run anymore. I can't risk Charlie getting hurt." Seeing that Jayne is fighting his rage... and tears River hugs him, "Don't come after me."

"River... how we are you get lost I find you."

"Now you have Charlie to think about."

Jayne buries his face in her neck, "I'm gonna find you again crazy girl, I can't not look. I can't leave you with them."

"They won't kill me, I'm too valuable."

"To me as well." Jayne lifts his head meeting her gaze, "When I wake up..."

"Be long gone."

"What about Charlie?"

"She knows. She understands." River whispers as she struggles to fight her own tears at the thought of her baby.

"Like you like this..."

"Sane?"

"Talkin normal. Not like I don't adore how you normally are." He smiles tucking her hair behind her ear. "What about Charlie? Doc will take her."

"I told him not too... but Simon"

"Doesn't like me."

River shrugs running her hands down his arms, "Swear Jayne... if the day comes that I come after you... you will stop me."

"River I ain't gonna..." he looks down "I can't baby. I may be a killer... but I can't kill you."

"If it comes down to it... do it." River says firmly.

"I'm gettin you back River... somehow." Jayne says sadly. "How can I not?" He brushes her hair back, "Still got to ask you to marry me."

"Paper is nothing to me." River takes his hand pressing it to her heart, "Here you are my husband. Have been since the moment I realized who you were... how you were meant to be in my life."

"Will you come back to us?"

"Odds are good but I don't know how it will be. To kill you... or be with you again." She shrugs

"You'll be with us again... without the tryin to kill us part." Jayne smiles sadly.

"Try to get along with Simon... he is Charlie's Uncle."

"I'll try."

"Don't push him out of Charlie's life even if he annoys you... she's all he has left now. No parents... no me."

"Will he take her from me?" Jayne asks

"Captain Daddy and Inara won't let him. Won't let you take her from him either." River closes her eyes tears falling as she feels him kiss her forehead. "I love you husband. Always will."

Jayne pulls her close as she starts to cry. "I love you wife. Never gonna stop." >

River blinks back tears, "I will miss all of you so much."

NEXT MORNING: SERENITY

Each awaken with the realization that River's visit into their minds was true... she is gone.

EVENING

"Someone is going to have to watch Charlie tonight." Mal remarks as he enters the mess hall. "Just checked on Jayne... seems he cracked open his stash..."

"Drunk?" Zoë asks

"Passed out on the bed." Mal answers looking at Kaylee who has spent a good part of the day crying, "Where's Doc?"

"Cleaning the infirmary... again." Kaylee answers her eyes on Charlie who is lying on a blanket playing.

Mal nods walking out of the mess hall he stands at the catwalk taking in the silence.

"Little too quiet." Zoë remarks as she joins him.

"Guess we've gotten used to having her running through here playing with Kaylee or avoiding Jayne." Mal remarks remembering the times he had threatened River and Kaylee if they made a mess or fell and hurt themselves running and playing.

"Did she..."

Mal nods turning to watch the mess hall, "She was right. I know he would try but nothin even the fact of protecting Charlie would let him do that."

"So its one of us."

"Hate to say it but if it does come to that might have too. Though she did say we'd know when."

"Talks in riddles even when tellin us to do that." Zoë says amused.

"Gonna miss havin her round."

"Kinda surprised Jayne ain't headin out to find her." Zoë remarks "Or Simon."

"Think they realize this is what she wanted."

"Those two are gonna fight... a lot when this sinks in."

"Guess we'll weather that like everything else" Mal shrugs

SOMEWHERE

River reactivates the beacon and walks away from the shuttle heading into town, 'Doing this is for the best. My family will survive.'

TBC…

COMMENTS

Wednesday, February 15, 2006 7:14 PM

COPILOT


I read it all and loved it! Thank you.

Thursday, February 16, 2006 12:04 AM

HUMBUG


AAAwwwwwwwwwwwww! *sniff* Shiny, but sad!

Sunday, March 5, 2006 4:05 AM

BELLONA


*cries* bring her back, please?

b

Saturday, November 4, 2006 4:50 PM

TAMSIBLING


Okay, I realize you haven't updated since February ... but I absolutely ADORE this fic and I hope and pray that you will finish it!

I'd love to see River kick some blue-handed butt and make it back to her family ... please, please, please?

Loved it!


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