Authors note: This story follows on directly from my story “The Trigger”

Simon awoke in the engine room though he did not know how or why. “Hello?” Shakily he got the his feet “Hello is anyone here?” “

“Alice is here” came the response. “Pardon?” “Alice is here,” said the voice again. It seemed to be coming from the walls. “Who is Alice?” he said almost involuntarily “Alice loves you” the voice cued. Simon fell to his knees. “No” he said and with an effort he found his feet again. “No”.

“Alice is here” came a voice but not the same as before. “Kaylee?” He said looking around him. “Alice is love” Kaylee responded. Something was wrong with her voice. “Alice is strength”.

Simon moved past the bulk of the engine to find Kaylee sitting in her hammock. Her eyes moved to meet his. She was ashen white a smile painted across her face. Some of the hair on the left side of her head had fallen out.

“Alice loves us so much she blessed us all with kisses” she grinned. Simon kneeled down and took both of her hands “Kaylee what happened? Who did this to you?” Kaylee began to giggle “Who?” The laughter built “Who? Who?” she bust into hysterics the motion dislodging even more hair “Who! Who! Who!”

“Kaylee stop!” Simon said attempting to calm her. Kaylee continued to convulse the sound of her laughter filling the ship. “Who!” Her hair continued to fall from her head. “Kaylee stop! Stop now! Please!” Simon begged trying to hold her still.

Suddenly Kaylee ceased; her eyes meet Simon again for a moment then drifted away. “Kaylee. No Kaylee. Kaylee!” Her body went limp in his arms the smile on her face widened. “Alice” she whispered.

“Death is such a beautiful thing,” a voice said in the distance. “Death is an unavoidable part of life” Another responded. “Murder is the purest joy” a third interjected.

Simon knew, but he didn’t know how. He moved towards them.

“You really shouldn’t be here Doctor.” A voice greeted him as he entered the Dinning room. “Who are you? What have you…?” Simon gasped in shock. Before him stood himself a Rabbit held in his arms.

River lay slumped in a nearby chair like a discarded rag doll.

“Hello bunny rabbit” a voice came from behind him. Inara, a Toad sat on her shoulder. “Garram moon brained freak” Jayne sat at the table a rat twitching on his head. He gave a small gesture towards River with his knife.

“Who are you?

What are you?”

Simon said desperately

“Fancach” said Jayne

“Buaf” said Inara

“Coinin” said the other Simon

“What?” Simon said confused.

“I doesn’t matter” Inara said thoughtfully. “Look” she pointed at the doorway leading to the bridge. A shadow stood there, dark against the light.

“Alice is here,” the voice said. It was the one he had heard before. The shape moved into the light.

She wore a red dress and thick black boots. Red lipstick the same as the dress. Golden blond curls fell in front of perching green eyes that stared out from that face. He knew that face. “River?”

Alice’s fist met his ribs; he crumpled back in pain. “River what are you?” A second blow met his jaw he flew to the floor. “River stop!” Her thick black boot found his chest with a crack. Blood flowed from his lips.

“Im Alice!”

Jayne grinned; the rat circled its paws

Inara watched fascinated

The Rabbit showed no emotion

“I couldn’t take it” came the voice from River crumpled body.

“You shut up!” Alice screamed “let me tell you something about your sister Simon” she kicked him in the ribs again. “As she said she couldn’t take it. They strapped her down and cut into her brain. Tortured her. And she couldn’t take it.”

“Who in the name off God could!” Simon cursed at her.

“But still they strapped her down. Still they continued their work.” Alice went on. “ So at night she would pretend.” “It wasn’t River they where torturing. I wasn’t River they where hurting.”

“It was Alice”

“Alice was older. Alice was stronger. Alice disserved it. Alice loved her so much. Anything so River would not have to sit in that chare again!”

“River I have to stop this” Simon groaned. “I have to stop.”

“And still they made her a killer! Not me, her!” Alice picked up the gun and pointed it at Simon.

The other Simon watched and stroked the Rabbits fur

Jayne grinned

Inara was fascinated

“Wasn’t it cool Simon! Wasn’t its spectacular? Those men with her eyes closed? The Reavers? She killed those Reavers good didn’t she! She’s a killer!”

“It had to be done. I had no choice” Simon struggled to his feet.

“There is always a choice! You’re a killer!” Alice’s finger pulsed over the Trigger.

“Do it” the other Simon hissed

“You have to do it” Jayne laughed

“It’s for your own good you have to go home now,” Inara said reassuringly

Simon stared down the barrel of the gun and said softly “I had to do it”

“No you didn’t! You shouldn’t be what they made you!”

“I had to.”

“No”

“I had to protect them”

“No no no” She began to cry.

“I cant live with it.” Alice said tears rolling down her face. “They made me a killer Simon. They hurt me so much.” The gun fell from her hand. She fell to the floor weeping. “They hurt me so much.” Simon kneeled down and took his sister in his arms “Its ok” He whispered “Its ok”.

The Rabbit The Toad and The Rat turned there backs in disgust.

“I killed. I killed. They made me a killer”

“Its ok” Simon comforted her ”its ok.”

In the medical Bay River woke up.