Same old "not my characters, no copyright infringements intended"

Series description: A post BDM fic exploring the crew's new life. River begins to have violent flashbacks, but are they her memories? Will post Miranda life be easier or will the Alliance strike back even harder? Can Kaylee and Simon last? How will Zoe react? Will Inara and Mal ever get together?

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“Doncha look spiffy! We’re just going to go get mucked up lookin’ bout the junk for what we need. I’ll make you into a great mechanic just you watch.” Kaylee said as she skipped up to Simon who was waiting near the door to the shuttle.

“I guess you’re right,” Simon sighed and looked down at his pristine outfit and shiny shoes in regret.

Kaylee, in a multicolored shirt and overalls, grabbed his hand and dragged him towards the shuttle.

“Nuthin’ to do but to fix you up right and proper. First stop will be the shops to get you some right proper muckin’ about clothes. That’s the first rule of mechanicking.”

As they enterred the shuttle, Mal interjected “now when we land, me and Jayne go first. You head on over to the junkyard. We meet back at the ship in three hours. Now Doc, don’ go gettin’ yourself kidnapped again…cuz I ain’t comin’ to get ya if you do.” He winked toward Kaylee as he couldn’t resist letting that last little bit out.

Mal pilotted the shuttle away from Serenity and through Beaumont’s atmosphere. They landed outside of the town and prepared to depart on their missions.

With Simon following, Kaylee skipped into the second hand shop.

Simon doubted he’ll find anything that fits as he glanced around. He jumped back as Kaylee held up a pair of workboots and overalls against him. “Perfect! Now all you need is a raggedy ole’ hat and goggles and we’ll be set. Go put these on and I’ll settle us up.”

Kaylee haggled with the vendor to include gloves and some other sundries for herself, and Simon did as directed by slipping on the coveralls and newly acquired boots. “If my parents could see me now.” He laughed to himself and walked around the shop to tap Kaylee on the shoulder from behind. “Do I look ok?” he said with a sheepish grin.

Kaylee’s eyes opened wide as she looked Simon up and down. An emotion flashed across her face. “I look stupid don’t I? Just say it.” Simon said with resignation.

Without warning, Kaylee threw herself into his arms and pressed her lips on his. The top of his overalls slipped off his shoulders.

“Oh Simon,” she said when she could take a breath, “you look even better than I imagined. Why aren’t you wearing a shirt under that?”

“You didn’t buy me one,” he said as he hastily pulls his overalls closed.

“Oh I guess I didn’t” Kaylee said, suspicially innocent.

“That’s it!” He said as he swept her up into his arms. “Am I going to have to do as any lusty mechanic would do and take you to the junkyard to have my way with you?”

“Shiny - as long as that junkyard has a buffer panel!”

----

Mal and Jayne were asking around at the local watering holes but the buzz was that the Alliance had stopped shipments to border planets to deal with the fallout from Miranda.

“Jayne, is your merc license still good enough to get us in the bounty hunter bars?” asked Mal as they sipped on a stiff brew in a dive of a place.

“Yeah. But I ain’t tried usin’ it since I been with you. Ain’t exactly foolproof” replied Jayne.

Mal looked around and said with dismay at the lack of work, “Right. Let’s hit up Jaybol’s and get the latest news.”

As Jayne and Mal approached Jaybol’s, the dingiest merc bar around, there was a line filled with the lowly forms of life on the border planets. Bounty hunters, unlicensed whores, bankers, and lawmen all a bit the worse for wear lined up to partake in the local beverages. What makes a merc bar different from a different upscale bar is the fact that you can enter a merc bar heavily armed. The thought being that anyone dumb enough to pull a weapon will get shot down before they get off a round.

“Show ya card. What’s yo’ business?” asked a grimy large doorman as Mal and Jayne stepped up. Jayne flashed his merc card and nodded that Mal was with him. Double-checking the card and looking at Jayne closely, the doorman waved on the two.

“on hold…repeat ALL ALLIANCE FUNDED BOUNTIES ARE ON HOLD. Credits will not be paid for any outstanding warrants until further notice…” The multiple video displays of the dingy poor excuse of a bar blared out the same message. The din increased exponentially with expletives in English, Chinese, and even the obscure Japanese.

“Looks like the Alliance is workin’ on coverin’ up what we let loose,” said Mal with a grin from ear to ear. “May make it easier for us to go ‘bout our business. We’ll still have to be mighty careful, but I don’t think the Alliance will be too worried about our activities. Jayne, I’m gonna buy you a Mudder’s Milk!”

“A’right cap’n” Jayne replied jovially, an emotion usually reserved for Vera.

Mal looked down at his watch and noticed they had a bit more than one hour left before they needed to return to the shuttle. “Keep” said Mal calling over the bartender, “how about 5 more rounds for me and ma’ boy here.” Mal and Jayne enjoyed the fruits of their information finding expedition over six muddler’s milks.

“Gorram Alliance…al’ays shootin’ at us, now they take away our bounties!” shouted Jayne, looking to incite the bounty hunters.

“Careful son, someone might think you a Browncoat,” advised the bartender as he pours Jayne and Mal another Mudder’s Milk.

“And what’s so wrong with that?” replied Mal, “I lost a good many men out in the Valley. Alliance can just as soon bend over and kiss their own arse before I apologize for bein’ a Browncoat. I’M STILL FLYIN’!” Screamed Mal as he banged down an empty glass on the table.

At the last syllable of Mal’s proclamation, four barstools came swinging toward Mal. Jayne picked up his own bar stool and deflected each one in turn. He threw Mal to the ground off the stool to avoid a flying mug.

“Browncoats ain’t welcome in these parts. Brought nothin’ but death and pain to the middle planets! Scumbag independents!” shouted a lowlife as he charged toward Mal. Mal grabbed him buy the neck, stopping him dead in his tracks. He took two steps forward still holding the man by the neck and tossed him into a group of five other rowdy drunkards.

BANG, Ba-BANG! The bartender let off a few rounds of his shotgun. “No fightin’ in my bar. Bishop, Rooker, toss these two chung dong independents outta here!”

Two enormous beasts of men clad only in aprons suddenly emerged from behind the bar to pick up Jayne and Mal and toss them out.

Flying through the air Mal shouted, “That’s right! You never want to mess w/ Browncoats!”

“Or Jayne, the Hero of Canton!” added Jayne as he landed on Mal.

As they struggled to stand up, Mal stuttered “Best get back to the shuttle...wouldn’t want Kaylee and Simon to get too cozy!”

They made their way back to the shuttle and found Kaylee and Simon asleep in an embrace on top of the newly acquired buffer panel. Simon was wearing his overalls and boots, minus an undershirt.

Jayne couldn’t help himself, “nice outfit boy.”