Tucker & Dale vs The Mars Girlz act7
Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Concluding act of “Tucker & Dale vs. The Mars Girlz”. Hope fan-fic readers enjoyed the little sequel to “Tucker & Dale vs. Evil”……I do agree with Angelle that Dale ( at least in this story) was quiet the paranoid hillbilly, still I’m cutting him some slack because of the crazy things that happened to him and Tucker the previous summer……..maybe I’ve been watching too many UFO, swamp monster and ghost haunt shows on tv (grin)……anyway, hope you enjoy the final….BP


Tucker & Dale vs. The Mars Girlz 7 ( Friends Reunited? )

Cast of players:

Tucker Trenton- Alan Tudyk Dale Dobson-Tyler Labine Dr.Rita Scales- Christina Hendricks Renée Summers (alien actress1)- Kim Kardashian Peter Owen ( Writer/Director/Producer of Aliens aren’t Serene)- Ben Stiller Zoë Beckett (alien actress2)- Paris Hilton Claudia Jewel (alien actress3)- Allison Scagliotti Percy Thibodeaux- Nick Nolte Marshal Tucker- Jupiter auto mechanic Gable Tucker- Marshal’s son Victor Reynolds- Nathan Fillion Bryan Scully-Props guys & set director

ACT 7 ______________________________________________________________________________

Tucker Trenton sat on the table in Dr.Scales office. He had spent two days in the small town of Jupiter but now it was time to return to his campsite and his buddy Dale Dobson. Rita Scales wanted to see her patient one last time before he left. She examined Tucker’s ant bites.

“ They’re healing nicely. “ She spoke of Tuckers ant stings. “ Still I have something else that may speed up the process.”

She reached into her medical bag and pulled out a tube of cream. She removed the cap and began applying some of the olive green paste to Tucker‘s infected areas.

“ This will help dry out the sores and stop any infection.” She paused, “ But there are a couple of small drawbacks. It may discolor the skin for a few days and the medication could cause some itching. Other than that it’s an excellent cream for bug bites.” She smiled.

“ You’re the doctor.” Trenton told her. He slid off the table and pulled up his pants.

“ Time to go fetch my truck.” He said.

“ Just a moment, I’ll give you a ride.” Rita told him.


Down at Marshal’s Garage

“ Tucker I know we told you that your tuck would be ready today! But I had no idea we’d come in this morning and find your muffler on the ground! The vehicle is old, maybe time for you to get a new one!” He said.

Trenton looked at him.

“ We can have it ready in an hour!” The garage mechanic told the hillbilly.

Tucker hung his head in discus. How many times had he heard that in the past two days. He turned and saw Rita holding up her set of car keys.

“ Take my vehicle.” She smiled, “You can return it to me later. Besides I’d love to meet your friend Dale.” She turned and walked back up the street to her office.

Tucker really liked the doctor.

He reached into his pocket for his cell phone. It had, had a chance to dry out for two days. He hope it worked. He pushed Dale’s number and waited for the connection.


Dale Dobson, curled up in his sleeping bag heard his phone ringing. He had turned it on during the night to set the alarm tone. He noticed that it was Trenton calling.

“ Hello!”

“ Dale, it’s me!”

“ Where have you been?”

“ In Jupiter! I had an allergic reaction to those ant bites and had to get some medical treatment. I’m Ok! I’ll be there in half an hour!” He chuckled.“ Have I got a tale to tell you!” He ended the call.

Dale got out of his sleeping bag. Well, the alien had kept his promise. He had released his friend. At least it had sounded like Tucker!

Dale had to come up with a quick plan to release his captives. A scheme came to him. He gathered all his supplies and put them into the boat, then he entered the small tent and brought Zoë outside. He put her over his shoulder and headed deeper into the woods.

Zoë, the actress, was scarred out of her wits. “So! This is how her life would end! Taken out into the swamp and murdered by a crazed hillbilly!” She began to struggle against her bonds.

After about a hundred yards Dobson lowered his captive to the ground. He lay her against a leaf covered dirt mound and spoke to her in his hoarse voice.

“ I’m gonna cut your ropes. I won’t harm you. I want you to count to a thousand then you can take off the glasses. Do you understand?”

She shook her head that she did.

Dale cut the ties from Zoë’s wrist then he left…….making as little noise as possible. He went back to the campsite, retrieved Renée and broke down the tent and put it in the boat. He took the tape from Renée’s mouth.

“ Sit here quietly.” He told her.

He then drew a map to their location and placed where it could be found. He placed Zoë’s cell phone next to Renée. That completed, he entered his boat and headed back to he and Tucker’s old campsite.


Peter Owen watched as Percy Thibodeaux walked through the waters of Groome lake until he was up to his waist. The old Jupiter resident then opened a bottle of “ “ol Groome Whiskey” and emptied it’s contents into the water. He was muttering some gibberish that Peter, nor any of his crew that were witness to the event could understand. Just then Owen’s cell phone began to chime.


Zoë Beckett had counted to a thousand just as she’d been instructed to do. She then removed her mud covered sunshades. She looked around………..the devil beast was nowhere to be seen. That didn’t mean he wasn’t there. A creature of such cruelty enjoyed playing mind games with his victims. She waited several more minutes before she chose to move or make a sound.

Renée sat there breathing hard but she made no noise. She still had the dark shades over her eyes so she had no idea what was happening. She only knew she could hear nothing but the birds and swamp creatures. After a while she could hear someone’s voice calling in the distance. A woman’s voice! She recognized that it was Zoë.

“ Over here!” Renée shouted.

Soon Zoë discovered her friend and quickly unbound her. There was a map an cell phone laying there. They quickly called Owen.

Peter Owen spoke into his phone,

“ So you’re safe! The both of you! And you have a map that explains how to find you?”

Peter Owen watched as Percy returned from the waters of Groome lake. There was no emotion on the man’s face. Owen, at Percy’s request, had gotten the production crew to load the cases of whiskey into his old Chevy pickup truck. Satisfied with the confusion the production crew was having on the shoreline, he entered the vehicle an drove away. Happy that he now had three cases of his favorite whiskey stored in the bed of his truck.


Tucker Trenton had just returned to his camp and found Dale waiting for him. Tucker began to explain what had happened and Dale was listening but wasn’t sure if he believed it all. Tucker brought Dale over to the car.

“ What is this?” Dale questioned.

“ It’s Dr. Scales car, she’s back in Jupiter and really wants to meet you!” Tucker said as he entered the driver side of the vehicle.

“ But Tucker, what about our supplies, and shouldn’t we be getting outta here as soon as possible?!!” Dale was in total disbelief that his friend wanted to go back to Jupiter. He was becoming very suspicious.

Still, he slid into the passenger seat and watched his friend’s every move.

“ What if this weren’t Tucker? What if he had turned alien and was haulin him back to the examination table?” Dale watched his friend with eyes wide. Just then Tucker rolled up one of his pants legs and Dale got a look at his buddy’s pale green, scaly looking limb.

Tucker notice his friend’s strange eyes as he reached down to scratch his leg.

“ Odd lookin isn’t it! Looks almost like lizard skin…” He laughed. But Dale Dobson sure as hell wasn’t laughing with him.



Conclusion* One year later:

Kathy Allen sat next to her brother Timmy, in the booth in Boudreau’s café. Her parents John and Marlene sat across from their children. They were on vacation and on their way from Texas to Florida to go to Disneyworld. They had stopped in Jupiter late one evening to get a bite to eat before continuing their journey.

Kathy was an inquisitive girl. She always wanted to find out about things. She notice a news paper clipping that was stapled to the wall just behind the cook, Blain Boudreau.

The paper “ The Jupiter Star” had a headline that read “ Saucer Spotted Near Widow’s Cove On Groome Lake!”

“ Daddy, where’s Groome Lake?” She asked her parent.

“ Just up the road sweetie, why?” He answered.

“ Just wondering. How did it get it’s name?”

“ I don’t know darling, guess that’s a question you’d have to ask one of the local people.” John never looked up from his order menu.

At that moment there was a grunt from the table next to theirs. An old man turned his head to look their way.

“ Never heard of the “Mystery of Groome Lake?” The old man asked….he continued before they could reply.

“ It’s said that some time ago a flying saucer landed here, just on the outskirts of town. Why they chose Jupiter, no one knows. It’s assumed that they were collectors of some sort. They infiltrated the town to such a degree that folks became confused if their neighbors were alien or human. It’s said that they came here in order to mold people into their society and bring them back to Mars. To groom them just as the kings of ancient Egypt groomed their labor force into building the pyramids. The Martians wanted to groom a labor force to build their canals, pyramids and monuments back on the red planet. That’s how the lake got it’s name, Groome Lake!”

John Allen looked at the old man.

“ Yes but it’s spelled Groome Lake with an E!” He questioned the man’s story.

“Yes, just a misspelling by the paper at the time!” The old man finished.

Z, end


Thursday, September 9, 2010 9:36 AM


Read and didn't comment. Shame on me...LOL!! Love the ending. Misspelling and all...that was awesome. As for Dale, poor guy....his best friend is an alien. Anyway, thought this was awesome, BP.


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