Once You Lose Your Heart
Sunday, March 18, 2007

Follow up to Once You Know and Once You Fall. Kaylee wants to interfere with Inara's love life, but Inara is one step ahead. S/K, M/I


A/N: So, a lot of people wanted a M/I follow up to Once You Know and Once You Fall, and by a lot of people, I mean all five of you who read my stuff ;) For those who did review and ask for this, I love you guys ... and for what you are about to read, I apologise. I TRIED. I really did. But it turns out, I just can't write Mal and Inara. Simon and Kaylee just flow out, but with M/I, I'm hitting brick walls. The thing is, even by the end of the BDM, Mal and Inara just aren't in the place to begin a relationship. They have a LONG way to go, they can't just fall into it like S/K. I guess what I'm trying to say is, it would take more than a one shot to get them together. So, look at this as the HOPE for a relationship, rather than the begining of one. And, yeah, I copped out. Sorry.

Oh, and... the title of this fic comes from a song I had to sing for my Grade 3 singing exam. I love it, but I'm into musicals and all, so, don;t judge me. Anyway, it's off Me And My Girl. For anyone who doesn't know, the girl is singing about her boyfriend who has just come into a large inheritance and has been welcomed into a rich upper class world a cockney girl like her does not fit into. Or something. Anyway, just a little bit of background for ya. Enjoy. Or at least, pretend to.

Once You Lose Your Heart.

Simon opened the door to Kaylee’s bunk, smiling fondly at the bright lights and colourful sign. Climbing down the ladder as quietly as he could, so as not to wake her, he slipped off his shoes and quickly undressed. Glancing down at her sleeping form, and brushing a wisp of stray hair off her face, he crawled into bed beside her. Relaxing against the pillows, he felt Kaylee shift a little towards him, curling one arm over his chest. He pressed a soft kiss to her temple, and then regretted it when she began to stir.

“Bao bei?” he whispered, wondering if she would wake.

She let out a contented moan and her eyes flickered open.

Simon winced. “Sorry bao bei, I didn’t mean to wake you…”

“S’okay,” she muttered sleepily, leaning up to kiss him. “You just come to bed?”

“Mmm hmm,” he assented, stroking her hair.

Kaylee pulled a face. “What can you possibly find to do all the time? No one’s been hurt in ages.”

“Two days,” Simon amended.

“Two days,” Kaylee corrected herself. She paused. “Well, two days is quite a long time for us.”

Simon chuckled softly, pulling her closer. “I was talking to the captain,” he told her.

“Oh.” She paused. “Were you fighting?”

“No!” Simon told her indignantly, and she giggled. “What do you think I am?” Simon teased, bringing his face to hers and kissing her gently.

“Well…” she giggled some more.

“Huh,” Simon said, trying to sound offended, “I see.”

Kaylee kissed him once more and he smiled. She snuggled into his chest, closing her eyes again.

“What was you talking about?” she asked sleepily.

“You,” he told her, torn between staring at her and allowing his own tired eyes to close.


“He wanted to know if I love you,” Simon said, his voice taking on a tender tone.

He watched the smile grow on her face. “And what did you say?”

Simon moved his face closer, so his breathe tickled the skin behind her ear as he spoke. “I said yes.”

“Good,” she said, sounding content. There was a pause. “Was this the whole ‘Do-you-love-her-or-will-I-have-to-throw-you-out-the-airlock’ conversation?”

“No,” Simon answered, chuckling. “He was asking me how I knew.”

Kaylee’s eyes flew open. She raised her head, staring at him in awe. “Really?”

Simon nodded. “I think we may have been unknowingly talking about Inara.”

Kaylee’s shocked expression changed to one of amusement. They had talked before about their suspicions concerning the captain and Serenity’s resident companion.

“That’s funny,” Kaylee said, “I was in Inara’s shuttle before…”

“Yeah, that is funny,” Simon agreed sarcastically, eyes twinkling.

She swatted his arm. “Shut up. I mean, when I was there, she was asking me the same kind of thing.”

Simon expression was blank. “Shah muh?”

“Simon!” she cried, struggling to keep her voice down, “Pay attention. This is important. Inara was asking me how I knew I was in love. She was asking me what it was like to hear the words.”

Simon smirked, leaning his forehead against hers. “And what is it like?” he asked, huskily.

She smiled against his lips. “It’s fun.”

“Fun?” He sounded offended again, and she laughed.

“You’re missing the point, Simon!”

“Okay, okay. So Mal and Inara have serious issues.” He observed Kaylee, amused. “Are you planning on interfering?

“No,” she reassured him, and snuggled back into his chest. Contentedly, Simon closed his eyes.

“I’m planning on us both interfering,” Kaylee continued, her words vibrating against his skin.

Simon sighed. “Of course you are.”

She replied by kissing his chest softly, and Simon shook his head fondly.

“Love you, Kaylee.”

He felt her smile against his skin. “Love you too.”

* Inara was sitting in the galley, quietly sipping tea and involuntarily thinking about her conversation the previous day with Kaylee, when he entered. With a barely discernable nod in her direction, he moved to the kitchenette and rummaged around for some form of edible breakfast.

“You’re up early,” she noted.

Mal paused in his actions and looked over at her. “What? I’m always up at the very crack of dawn, doin’ capt’ny things, I’ll have you know.”

Inara raised an eyebrow. “At the crack of dawn? We’re in space, Mal.”

He shrugged.

“So where are we headed?” Inara asked.

“Ain’t rightly sure just yet,” Mal replied, moving to sit beside her. “Why, are we anxious to line up some clients?”

Inara rolled her eyes. “You know I haven’t taken on any clients since … I came back.”

“Right. I forgot. Taking a little extended leave?”

“I’m merely exploring my options,” Inara said stiffly.

Mal pause, looking surprised. “Options?”

Inara lowered her eyes. “Mal…” she began, her voice taking on an entirely different tone.

“Captain, need you on the bridge,” River’s voiced piped through the comm., startling them both.

With one last, unreadable glance at Inara, Mal stalked from the room.

“Damn,” whispered Kaylee, who had been watching the pair, hidden from sight in the hallway leading to the engine room.

Simon stood beside her, looking torn between amusement and exasperation. “So, what’s your plan?”

Kaylee looked at him sceptically. “Hasn’t being on this boat taught you anything? Plans never work.” She winked at him. “Much better to just … wing it.”

“You two can come out, you know,” Inara called, not even turning.

Kaylee froze. Musing that it might be un-gentlemen-like of him to let her take all the blame, Simon prodded her towards the galley, following resignedly.

The couple entered the room, looking guilty. Inara smiled at them. “I appreciate the thought, Kaylee, but I don’t need an intervention.”

“You don’t?” Kaylee said, looking non-plussed.

“No.” Inara smiled at the puzzled expression on her friends face. “I did listen to what you said to me yesterday. And I can assure you, I know what I’m doing.”

Kaylee blinked. “You do?”

Inara laughed softly. “Why do you think I came back?”

With that, she stood up gracefully and left the room, heading towards the bridge after Mal.

Kaylee and Simon exchanged similarly stunned looks. After a moment, a smile grew on Kaylee’s face.

“Looks like you won’t have to be interfering after all, sweetie,” she told Simon brightly.

He pulled her closer, kissing her gently. “Good. I can think of a few things I’d much rather be doing.”

Giggling, Kaylee pulled away.

“Not so fast … this just means we can get to work on River and Jayne.”

“What!?” Simon exclaimed. She grinned wickedly at him, and darted out of his grasp. He chased her as she ran back to the engine room, giggling madly the whole way.

On the bridge, Inara stood a little behind Mal, watching as he debated with River over plotting their next course. His eyes darted over as he spoke, just for a moment, and he smiled as she met his gaze. Inara smiled back.

Kaylee had told her there was no point in waiting, that once you knew you loved someone, you should tell them. But Inara would wait. She knew she and Mal had many bridges to cross, but she had made up her mind. This time she wouldn’t run away.

So much had passed between them since they had first met. She knew it would be foolish to assume that they could just confess their feelings and fall easily into a relationship. For them, nothing would be that simple, at least not for a while.

It might take baby steps for them to get there, but they would. She would follow Mal, because that was what you did, once you lost your heart.


Sunday, March 18, 2007 7:34 AM


And for anyone who cares, the lyrics to the song Once You Lose Your Heart are as follows... I really think they suit Inara's thinking.

<i>Once you lose you heart,
Once somebody takes it
From the place it rested in before
Once you lose your heart,
Once somebody wakes it
Then it isn’t your heart anymore

It’s gone before you knew it could ever go that way
And now you must pursue it forever and a day
Once you lose your heart
Once somebody takes it
There’s one thing certain from the start
You’ll find forever
You’ve got to follow your heart.</i>

And yes. I had to sing that. In front of a balding examiner. He was actually very nice. He gave me 19. Out of 20. Doesn't stop me cringing though.

Sunday, March 18, 2007 7:34 AM


Oh poo. The doo-dahs don't work.


Sunday, March 18, 2007 9:12 AM



While normally I would scream "COP OUT!" at the top of my lungs at this...I think you have a completely valid point here, Chazzer. Even with things like Mal's attempted rescue of Inara from the Training House and the discovery of what happened on Miranda altering Inara's would still take something serious or lots of baby steps for these two to get together;)

So...I give you a 9/10 and request that you keep on with this storyline as Mal and Inara take those little steps together:D


Sunday, March 18, 2007 9:13 AM


Oh...and the font coding? One has to use square brackets - " [" and "]" to get it to work around here;)

Sunday, March 18, 2007 10:37 AM


Awwwww. Cop-out shmop-out. It's cute all the same. Also? The Simon/Kaylee rocks my socks hardcore. :) Love it.

Sunday, March 18, 2007 11:52 AM


Thanks guys.

I toruted myself over this enough - I don't think I'll be writing anything else focussing on Mal and Inara. Maybe if I let them share the spot light with Simon and Kaylee for a while I'll get the hang of it though.

*hits se;f over head with heavy book*

Sunday, March 18, 2007 11:53 AM


No, Charlotte. Toruted is not a word. I think you mean tortured.

Sunday, March 18, 2007 1:26 PM


First of all: Sorry for not commenting on your work earlier, it's brilliant. I pretty much agree with everything that BEB said above except to add that the developing relationship between Mal and Inara could provide an excellent background for a future SERIES of fics (cough, hint, cough)

Normally I'm a huge S/K fan, but I'd love to read M/I developing slowly (as a background for S/K fics :) )

Glad to see a new S/K author out there.

Sunday, March 18, 2007 1:45 PM


It sounds as if Inara has her own agenda and timetable and that would make an excellent starting point for a slow build up to M/I. You really do excel with S/K though and it shows. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me

Sunday, March 18, 2007 2:31 PM


Mal/Inara is very hard to write, especially Inara IMHO. You did do a good job. Keep it up and keep the relationship business simmering.

Sunday, March 18, 2007 6:38 PM


I agree with everyone else - this was perfect! Your S/K was sweet and lovely and just made me all warm and fuzzy, while your Mal/Inara was perfectly in character. You're right, there's no way they could just jump into a relationship after Miranda a la S/K - it's not who they are!

And I loved Inara catching Simon and Kaylee eavesdropping - just a great little moment. Please continue ...

Monday, March 19, 2007 2:51 AM


They're not together, but it's sweeet, fluffy progress! And that's shiny with me.

Monday, March 19, 2007 3:45 AM


lol, you thinking this is a cop-out... it's not, most of the really GOOD and BELIEVABLE M/I fics start off slow, them getting over past issues, agreevences, whatnot.... what WOULD be a cop out is if you didn't continue this into a romance =D *veeery subtle hint (all sarcasticley like)*

Monday, March 19, 2007 5:05 AM


>“I’m planning on us both interfering,” Kaylee continued, her words vibrating against his skin.

>Simon sighed. “Of course you are.”

Bwahahaha! Ok, now that was SUCH a great little section of lines. I can see those words coming out of the characters mouths.

I think the M/I was very believable. I, too, don't think they are in any place to begin a relationship at the end of the film.

Keep writing that S/K, though. Youv'e got them down very well! :)

Monday, June 18, 2007 9:38 AM


"Hasn’t being on this boat taught you anything? Plans never work." LOL!!!!!

Love the sweet, fluffy, goodness of this little series. Sigh...

You really make Kaylee fun and mischevious. I'd like to see more of Simon's reaction to Kaylee's plan for River and Jayne... guess I have to go back to BSR and if there's more!



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Angst ahoy. Simon and Kaylee need to talk.

Things have to end, one way or the other. Simon takes aim, but can he pull the trigger? Action and Angst.

Vents are useful things. Mal plays the messenger boy, Simon learns how to be intimidating, and Jayne doesn’t take the hint. Big Damn Action ensues.

Regan plants the seed of doubt in Kaylee’s mind, while Jayne, Simon and River hatch a plan. A cunning hat and a girl with a gun? Yeah, this is gonna go great. Meanwhile, Mal rethinks his attitude to Simon.

Kaylee is in Regan Tam’s clutches, but all is not as it seems. River decides to clean up Simon’s mess. Mal clutches at straws, and Jayne clutches his big stick. Serenity has some visitors…and then she has some more.

Mal considers childproofing the ship when he discovers Simon and Jayne are gone. Regan makes some progress and Simon learns what it takes to buy a gun. As always, a little angsty, but not too much.

What’s going on? No one’s quite sure… Simon has some serious regrets and turns to an unusual source for comfort, and Mal is sick of the doctor causing trouble. More angst as the crew is being whittled down. S/K

When Simon has made his mind up on something, there’s no swaying him. And right now, he’s decided to be an idiot. Big Damn Angst, as the crew try to find the missing River.

Some people just can’t catch a break. Jayne thinks Simon had a deprived childhood, Wash is left out, Simon gets to go fishing and Kaylee has been waiting long enough. A little fluff, a little smut, and a whole lot of things going not smooth. R, I guess.

The crew decide to hide while figuring out their next move. Sun, sea and sand … all Kaylee is missing is her boyfriend. Simon is torn and River plays ‘I Spy.’ A good healthy mix of fluff and angst.