Once You Fall
Monday, February 26, 2007

Now Simon's sorted out his own love life, it's time to impart a little wisdom to the stubborn captain. S/K, implied M/I. Follow up to Once You Know


Mal sat in the galley alone, clearing away the mess that had been left after dinner. The ship was quiet, as everyone had turned in for the night. Half grumbling to himself that Kaylee had neglected her turn to wash up, presumably to spend more time in Simon’s bunk, Mal stacked the dishes in the sink.

Finishing, he was about to turn in when he heard something. He paused. Someone was whistling.

Nonplussed, Mal followed the sound, and found his way to the infirmary. He watched, half in amusement, half in disbelief, as Simon moved around the room, tidying, and all the while whistling softly to himself.

When he was done, Simon dimmed the lights and turned, to find Mal standing in the doorway.

“Son of a…” he yelled. He attempted to compose himself. “Captain. Something I can do for you?”

Mal grinned. “Feelin’ a mite cheerful, aren’t we?”

Simon looked vaguely abashed, but was smiling nonetheless. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Right,” Mal agreed. “So your whistling a happy tune like you ain’t got a care in the ‘verse, that ain’t got anything to do with my lil’ Kaylee?”

Simon actually blushed at that, and Mal laughed out loud. “Oh, you’ve got it bad.”

“Maybe,” Simon said softly. The two men moved back into the infirmary, Mal leaning against the counter and watching the doctor as he found something else to fiddle with.

“And is there any particular reason why you’re interested?” Simon asked, not looking up. The though of Mal taking an interest in his love life struck an ominous chord within him.

“You just make me chuckle is all,” Mal said. “The prissy, core-bred doctor spends eight months on this boat and refuses to let go of his refined ways. Then my mechanic gets him in the sack and suddenly he’s whistling…”

Simon laughed.

“And smiling!” Mal added, sounding incredulous.

“I know, it’s hard to believe, but I’m actually not a robot,” Simon said.

There was a comfortable pause.

“So tell me,” Mal said, “what took you so long?”

Simon sobered slightly. “All sorts of reasons…”

“Like what?”

Mal met Simon’s weary expression with an amused grin, and somehow he felt compelled to answer.

“Well, River for one… I guess I thought she needed my full time attention. And Kaylee … to Kaylee, everything’s always so simple … and my life is anything but.”

“Didn’t wanna drag her down with you?” Mal enquired.

“Something like that.”

Mal shook his head. “For all your smarts you can be mighty dim when it comes to people, Simon.”

“It’s been said,” Simon agreed.

There was another moment’s pause, before Mal asked another pressing question.

“And do you love her?”

Simon met his gaze, and Mal could see a glimmer of defiance in his blue eyes. “Yes.”

“Huh. Good. ‘Cos I don’t want my mechanic gettin’ all upset. I’ve woke up to no gravity before an’ it ain’t an experience I wish to repeat.”

Simon surveyed the captain calmly. “Why are we having this discussion, captain?”

Mal looked at his feet, shifting uncomfortably, and didn’t answer. “How’d you tell her?”

There was a pause, and Mal looked up. “You have told her?”

Simon nodded. “Yes. I just told her. It seemed like the thing to do.”

“You told her without messing up?”

“I think I’m growing.”

“Well,” Mal said, blinking. “I’m shocked my own self. And all kinds of proud.”

“Are you always this sentimental,” Simon joked, and Mal grinned, remembering.

“So when did you know?”

“Know what?” Simon asked, wondering why he was so oddly comfortable with this increasingly unusual conversation.

“That you loved her…”

Simon moved over to straighten the infirmary chair, considering. “It’s not like I woke up one morning and knew. It just, crept up on me.” He looked back at Mal. “But I know I’ve been denying it to myself for a long time.”

There was a short pause, and then he continued. “But it’s only so long you can deny things, even to yourself. You can have any reason in the ‘verse to run away, but once you…” he trailed off, embarrassed.

“Fall,” Mal supplied. “Once you fall there’s no climbing back up?”

Simon surveyed the captain thoughtfully. “Are you speaking from experience?”

Mal shifted, suddenly uncomfortable. “Just getting’ caught up in your poetical yapping,” he said lightly.

Unconvinced, Simon nodded politely. “Well.”

“Well,” Mal agreed. Then, “Don’t let me be keeping you. I’m sure lil’ Kaylee’s waiting on you.”

Smiling, Simon followed Mal out of the infirmary, shutting the door behind them.

“Goodnight, captian,” he said.

“Night ‘doc,” Mal replied, heading for the stairs.

Simon thought for a moment, then on a whim, called after the captain. “Mal?”

Mal paused halfway up the stairs. “Yep?”

There was laughter in Simon’s voice as he spoke. “Climbing can be hard work, and in my experience, pointless.” He paused. “Falling is preferable.”

Mal let the words seep in; he had the feeling the doctor knew something he shouldn’t.

“Stop talking in riddles,” he said gruffly, “you’re as crazy as your sister.”

Simon just laughed, and as Mal entered his bunk, he could swear he heard the man resume his whistling.


Monday, February 26, 2007 1:19 PM


Aw, absolutely perfect! I'm so glad you wrote this little companion bit to the K/I convo. Now, where is our M/I?

Monday, February 26, 2007 2:18 PM


I thoroughly enjoyed this but got confused with Simon's last comment that falling was better than climbing. It was a pleasure to see the two of them having a conversation without getting annoyed or yelling at each other. Yep, think they've grown. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me

Monday, February 26, 2007 8:07 PM


Awesome, a perfect follow-up.
You should do another sequel.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 12:00 AM


Thanks for all the shiny comments :)

Amdobell, Simon's comment is reffering to how both Mal and previously Simon tried to deny their feelings, prevent themselves from falling in love. What Simon is trying to say is that he took a risk and let himself fall, and that he's happier now, hint hint, Mal should do the same.

Sorry if it wasn't as clear as I'd thought.

And yeah, I do enjoy the S/M dialogue ... I always like writing conversations between guys when there are no females present... I guess because I technically have no idea how that actually goes.... odd, that.

M/I .... hmmmm.... maybe....

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 5:48 AM


This confused me a little because your other story isn't done yet - right? So I was wondering why the skip until I figured out that this was just a different story all together.

I like the Simon / Mal discussion. I don't think we got enough of that in the series, and certainly not the film. It's good to see them not fighting for a change.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 6:19 AM


Eeep, sorry for all the confusion. Maybe this wasn't quite ready to be posted...

Tuesday, February 27, 2007 1:57 PM


Oh...this was ready for posting, Chazzer. It was just the metaphor you chose for the conversation wasn't quite transparent. I certainly got the idea...but I gots me some odd brain waves. Tend to see things others don't;D

And please give us the scene where Mal and Inara jointly come to the conclusion about needing to confess to the other person about their individual feelings!




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Angst ahoy. Simon and Kaylee need to talk.

Things have to end, one way or the other. Simon takes aim, but can he pull the trigger? Action and Angst.

Vents are useful things. Mal plays the messenger boy, Simon learns how to be intimidating, and Jayne doesn’t take the hint. Big Damn Action ensues.

Regan plants the seed of doubt in Kaylee’s mind, while Jayne, Simon and River hatch a plan. A cunning hat and a girl with a gun? Yeah, this is gonna go great. Meanwhile, Mal rethinks his attitude to Simon.

Kaylee is in Regan Tam’s clutches, but all is not as it seems. River decides to clean up Simon’s mess. Mal clutches at straws, and Jayne clutches his big stick. Serenity has some visitors…and then she has some more.

Mal considers childproofing the ship when he discovers Simon and Jayne are gone. Regan makes some progress and Simon learns what it takes to buy a gun. As always, a little angsty, but not too much.

What’s going on? No one’s quite sure… Simon has some serious regrets and turns to an unusual source for comfort, and Mal is sick of the doctor causing trouble. More angst as the crew is being whittled down. S/K

When Simon has made his mind up on something, there’s no swaying him. And right now, he’s decided to be an idiot. Big Damn Angst, as the crew try to find the missing River.

Some people just can’t catch a break. Jayne thinks Simon had a deprived childhood, Wash is left out, Simon gets to go fishing and Kaylee has been waiting long enough. A little fluff, a little smut, and a whole lot of things going not smooth. R, I guess.

The crew decide to hide while figuring out their next move. Sun, sea and sand … all Kaylee is missing is her boyfriend. Simon is torn and River plays ‘I Spy.’ A good healthy mix of fluff and angst.