OBJECTINSPACE'S BLOG

ObjectInSpace

The Trouble With Girls
Tuesday, September 28, 2004

Note: This is full of male adolecent agnst. Yes, I am still of the age where I think I am the center of the universe, so proceed with caution.

Talking to girls is TOUGH !!! It is aguably one of the toughest things an adolesent male has to do. Sometimes, you spend half your day trying to get the balls to talk to a girl that you like and when you finally do, you sound like a total idiot (you could have sworn that the speech you made up sounded cooler and more manly in your head!) The girl walks away shaking her head , and you are like .

Now, I'm not saying that talking to all girls is tough; on the contrary, my best friends are girls. But they aren't really girls. They're like one one the guys. The girls that I'm talking about are those pretty girls that you've had a crush on for several years but never have the guts to talk to (even though you've had a million and one chances to do so).

Sometimes talking to your friends that are girls is as hard as talking to those pretty girls. In fact, I'll say it can be harder. Take for instance an even that happened a few weeks ago at lunch. I was telling one of my friends about my predicament and she said "Well, you are talking to me, so you must be able to talk to girls" Before I had time to think out my words, I blurted out "I have trouble talking to pretty girls" My friend took great offense. She thought that I didn't think she was pretty. I tried to explain that I DID think she was pretty (and the truth is, I do. In fact I think she's beautiful) but it was no use, she walked off and didn't speak to me for the rest of the day. Again I was like (and I finally knew what Simon felt like in nearly every episode where he tried to talk to Kaylee and wound up sounding like a total idiot. It's not that he's terrible at talking to girls, it's that his mouth movies faster than his mind). You really don't want to hurt your friends that are girls' fellings, so when I made a comment like that to her, I felt worse than after one of my speeches (which I'm telling you sounded so good in my head)

Why the hell did I act such a ? I've been asking myself this for the past week. My mother says its hormones and my little brother says its because I'm not as suave as him, which I tend to agree with. (As for my father, I get the impression that he thinks I'm gay, so he dosen't get involved in my sorrid affairs. He just cares that I'm happy).

I guess when we get to the core of the matter, girls are just strange. They are like another species that adolecent males can't seem to understand. It's not that we aren't able to communicate with them, THEY are unable to communicate with us (because us adolecent males just love to make excuss for reasons why we can't do things). So it's not the fault of the adolecent male, it's the fault of the girl. Now I'll need to figure out how to express that to them (which means talking to them somehow).........DAMN!

COMMENTS

Tuesday, February 28, 2006 8:35 AM

BELLONA


i've been a girl for nearly seventeen years now, and i'm still figuring out how to talk to the opposite sex...the same sex...in fact, just people in general. but here's a 3-letter tip:
MSN (AIM or AOL or whatever) that way if you screw up you can just put jk or lol after it. but i guess to do that you need to get their email...and that involves talking to them...i'm not very good at this.

b

ps. if you're really stuck, just smile and say hello in passing, or offer to help her with something. but don't make it seem like you're stalking her, she probably won't like it.

Thursday, September 30, 2004 5:49 AM

CAPTAINHARBATKIN


Freud asked "What do women want?". He didn't have an answer. What possible chance do the rest of us have?

BTW, it doesn't get better as you get older, you just get used to it.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004 3:34 PM

OBJECTINSPACE


Oh, and as for dating my friend, who I think is beautiful of mine, its out of the question. She is too dear of a friend to me to lose because I decide to ask her out.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004 3:30 PM

OBJECTINSPACE


I need to thank you all for your feed back, its been useful.

Female Jayne: I wasn't implying that I call my friends ugly or male. I just don't percive them as "girls", but rather as close friends. I only have one really close guy friend,(my interests seem fall into a more feminine category) so to me they are like "one of the guys" (just how I'm like "one of the girls" to them).

Wednesday, September 29, 2004 8:31 AM

FEMALEJAYNE


Hi give you a tip on talking to girls friends and the ones you like. Don't plan speachs but think about what you are going to say before you open your mouth. Meaning don't plan you say this they say that because when they get off script it totally screws you up. A tip on talking with your female friends. girls don't like being called ugly or male.

Wednesday, September 29, 2004 6:51 AM

KIQUOA


I agree with Ebo, the girls you feel you can talk to are the ones that are going to be most worth dating. Heck, I knew my wife for 7 years before we got together.

Honestly though, relations with the opposite sex (or same sex if so inclined, hey, you wouldn't be the first) just arn't worth it until you are 23 or so. Not on any perminent basis. People just change too much during the late teens, early 20's. Save time, money and headache, develope a sport or an interest in cars, or a good health addiction to booze.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004 7:11 PM

NEEDLESEYE


Hormones can make the littlest comment a really big deal. Watch out for 'em.
Your friend that you say is beautiful, is probably the one who deserves half of your day's worth of thinking what to say. It sounds like your hormones were speaking, and it's an embarrassing situation to get over. If it upset you that she's upset about what happened, chances are you should re-think the interest in the "pretty girl" thing.
My recommendation is, ask out your friends. Perfect example: My husband is a guy I went to school with from 6th grade til graduation. We really didn't know each other but we had the same friends, and knew the same people. Ten years later turns out we're working at the same place, then dating , then married. Just think if he'd asked me out in school???
*sigh* ...dumb boys.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004 3:36 PM

EBONEZER


Girls can be weird.

But boys are just dumb. (sorry, check out my blogs though - your girl venting is nothing to my boy bashing) :tounge: All in good fun, right?

Some girls can be wierd and get offended by dumb things like that. (I don't really understand it myself, and I am one). A lot of girls actually. I think you're just stuck winging it...sorry.

Heres a thought though, maybe you should ask out one of the girls you CAN talk too.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004 11:26 AM

CHANNAIN


Speaking as a woman, I can truthfully say that talking to a fella you've admired from afar certainly isn't a picnic either. I got a little insight as to why, though, in my Composition class just recently. We had to read an essay by Deborah Tannen that had a lot of the men and women in the class going "oh... yeah... now I get it." Including those who had been married for awhile.

I included the link. I think you'll find it a good read - oh, and it's short too

http://www.georgetown.edu/faculty/tannend/sexlies.htm

Tuesday, September 28, 2004 9:33 AM

OBJECTINSPACE


Yeah, I know that women read these boards, I just needed someplace to vent. As you have read my previous attempt didn't work.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004 8:12 AM

COSMICFUGITIVE


I understand what you're saying OIS.
I'm no Oprah Winfrey, but when you like a girl the best thing is to just be yourself. That's who they might be interested in. If they refuse, it's not the end of the world. At least you tried.

Quote:


Originally posted by ObjectsInSpace.
I guess when we get to the core of the matter, girls are just weird. It's not that we aren't able to communicate with them, THEY are unable to communicate with us. So it's not the fault of the man, it's the fault of the girl.



I have to disagree. It's the same for girls. They have a hard time asking out guys they really like too. Although, girls are better at expressing their feelings than boys.It's just human nature.

I don't claim to know everything about girls. They're still a mystery to me.
Although,they'll like you when your not trying too hard to impress them. You still need to impress girls, just not in an overblown, cliched kind of way.
They have feelings too and probably do like you too and are as equally nervous.

In relation to Simon & Kaylee, there were moments when Simon would be himself (He would say something that he felt strongly and fairly about and she was impressed because he was being himself). It wasn't forced or false. It was his true self.

I hope that's been helpful.
Does anyone have any better advice?

Tuesday, September 28, 2004 7:43 AM

WILLOWY


Grrr that's the 2nd time today I've had to re-log in. The above post was me...


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