PREPARE FOR BLOGITY BLOGGY GOODNESS. OR NOT.

Tuesday, January 24, 2006 3:09:17 PM

well, umm. here goes.

I am capable of rearranging the fundamental building blocks of the universe in under six seconds with enough time leftover to move 30 feet. I am capable of manipulating matter and energy on a subatomic level by speaking. A mere flick of my finger is sufficient to alter the gravitational pull of the planet. I shelve physics texts under 'fiction' in my personal library! I consider the laws of thermodynamics loose guidelines at best! In short, I am grasping the reigns of the universe's carriage, and every morning I wake up, look to the heavens, and shout, "Giddy up, boy!" You may never grasp the complexities of what I do, but at least have the courtesy to feign something other than slack-jawed oblivion in my presence. I, sir, am a wizard, and I break more natural laws before breakfast than of which you are even aware!
-Vaarsuvius, the ORDER of the STICK.