Fun and Games - 2.1 - Hangover: Mal
Sunday, January 15, 2006

First of an eight part sequel to "Spin the truth", each crew member's tale of the day after the game, this is how Mal's day went by.


AN: After a writers block wore it's ugly head, I was at a blank on *how* to write a sequel, cause as I'm gonna be focusing on the whole crew's experience a long linear sequel just didn't sound right for a continuance, so in the end I decided that I'm gonna divide the sequel into eight parts, one for each crew member's point of view. So treat these eight parts as a puzzle to get the whole picture on the morning after.

AN2: Thank you EA for the beta-helping :) I should just start calling you my beta :P Also thanks to DancingRiver for helping me determine what path I wanted to take.

AN3: If you haven't read "Spin the truth" yet, I suggest for you to do so, otherwize, this will make no sense... Last you saw Mal he was in one of Inara's dresses, wearing make-up, passing out from too many drinks. Btw... I haven't decided exactly the order of people's points of view, so you might get the chapters you want faster if you make requests :P

*** Fun and Games - 2.1 - Hangover: Mal ***

Mal knew just by the state of his head when he woke up that this was one of his worse hangovers. The only thing he could hear was some high pitched tone, his head was aching, and it just started hurting even more when he opened his eyes, adjusting to the light that was far too bright to be his bunk. His mouth was dry as sand paper. He would give anything for a glass of water, but as he tried getting up, something seemed to be grounding him. Something, or rather someone was holding him down. As he turned around to get a look at the perpitrator, he felt to his horror, himself being pulled close into an embrace by the still sleeping, and very naked mercenary.

Preferring the occational gun showdowns, rather than the old fashioned rough'n tumble, Mal was no match even to a sleeping Jayne's posessiveness. He tried slipping down through the arms and pull free, which resulted in a grunt and his face learning exactly why the nickname man-ape was so fitting. If anyone was to come in...

A high-pitched giggle that was suddenly stiffled, from what he guessed to be a hand covering the mouth, gave him the answer he didn't want. He tried wriggling downwards, as the mercinary's hands were now just holding his head in place, when he felt movement further down.

Oh no, that better not be what he thought it was...


- This is the worst hangover I ever experienced, Mal groaned, clutching his head.

- Look at the bright side, sir. Least you didn' get married this time, Zoe said, carefully eyeing him, barely managing to keep a straight face, while adding. - You didn't get married, right?

- Aw, Mal, Wash chimed in. - You could have invited us, you know. Here I go and make you best man in mine and in return I get no invitation...

- There was no weddin', Mal exclaimed, before his eyes went wide in horror. - ...I think. Niao se dub doo gway you don't think we...

That did it for the pilot and first mate as they had to cling onto each other just to avoid falling over from laughing.

- Come to think of it, Zoe said, semi-sobering from laughter. - Jayne was awfully flirtatious last night.

Horrified by the way this conversation was going, Mal fled the room, as the first mate and pilot started another round of laughter. He froze in his steps as he almost collided with the now awake, but still very naked mercinary. A very uncomfortable silence went over them before they both incoherantly babbled something that was meant to be an excuse to pass each other. Mal could swear he heard Wash say something to Jayne, but he wasn't interessted in finding out what and headed for the infirmary, clutching his hand to his head.


Inventing a new and shiny cuss word, as both the doc and any pain medication he knew was missing, Mal left the infirmary in search for a quiet space to soothe his throbbing head.

He knew he would most likely not be alone as he made his way to the engine room, but as he was in no mood to encounter whatever obsticles that stood between him and his very lonely bunk, he decided that he preferred the cheerful mechanic's company over the rest. As long as she didn't get too bright with him. Then he would probably reconcider it. As he stepped into the room, he stopped worrying. The mechanic was sitting silently in her hammock, clutching a half-full cup of orange juice. On one side was the box of pain killers he had turned the infirmary up-side-down searching for, on the other a so far empty bucket stood. It was very obvious she was as hung over as him.

- Hey there, he said quietly, both for his own and Kaylee's heads sake. - What you up to?

- Hidin'.

- Yeah, Mal muttered, pulling up a stool to sit down next to her. - Me too.

Kaylee was still staring down into her cup, as though it was the most fascinating thing in the 'verse. Mal knew she was simply focusing on something to get her mind of the urge to toss her cookies. He had often found himself doing the exact same thing before.

A couple of minutes later, when he assumed she had gotten back control of her bodily reflexes, she finally looked up to meet his eyes. What he wasn't prepared for was the wide eyed expression and sudden fit of giggles that sent her tipping sideways out of the hammock. The mechanic clutched her head and groaned as the landing made her back ache something fierce, but was still unable to stop laughing. She just lay there sprawled on the ground giggling, and every time she thought that she was finished, she looked up at Mal, and it just started all over again.

Mal stared dumbfoundly at his mechanic as she writhed on the floor in something that seemed to be a mix between grunts of pain and laughter. Adding this to the list over the events that day, River would soon seem the sanest out of them all. Worried as he noticed her hand never seemed to leave her backside, he bent down, offering to help her back to her feet.

- N-no, I... I'm sh... s-shiny, she stuttered.

- Oh, so you're shiny, my mistake, he said, shaking his head. - Care to explain why you actin' all giggly, then?

She bit her lip to hold back her laughter.

- How 'bout you explainin' how you got into that, she said, before laughter once more consumed her.

For the first time that day Mal looked down, eyes widening as he realized what kind of get-up he was in. Ai ya, this day kept getting better and better. He moved and fetched the handheld mirror Kaylee sometimes used to help her see around nooks in the engine. That was when he saw the make-up.

- Wo de ma, he muttered, carefully studying his face. - I... ah... I don' make a very good woman, do I?

- You ain't that bad, Kaylee said, sobering from the laughter. - Jus' different is all.

The combination of head, back and now stomach ache was enough to ground her from laughing. It hurt too damn much now.

- No, lets face it, I look like a sheep on its hind legs.

Kaylee smirked at the chosen words. If she had been a person to hold grudges for long, that comment alone would have made her forgive him for the time he had said those words about her.

- There is a resemblance, she playfully said, eyeing him up and down.

She chuckled as he in responce pretended to be insulted, then pushed herself up to a sitting position.

- Capt'n, you remember much of yesterday?

- Nope, whole day's pretty much a mystery for me, he said, then looked down at himself. - But must've been a pretty interesstin' day.

He then thought back to his interessting wake-up call.

- You know what.., he continued. - I don' think I wanna know. How 'bout you?

- I'd like to remember, but I don'. Would've made whole thing with Simon less confusin'...

- What with the doc, Mal asked, raising his brows.

- Nothin', Kaylee hurriedly answered, blushing.

- Don' sound like nothin', he pushed.

- Just had a confusin' wakin' up is all, she shrugged, then cocked her brows at him. - How 'bout you? What makes ya don' wanna know 'bout yesterday?

- I'm in a dress, wearin' make-up, my whole gorram crew's been laughin' at me all day, Mal said, shuddering as he thought back on the morning. - ...and I think I might'a married Jayne...

Kaylee clenched her mouth shut, in an amused smile. She looked on the verge to start laughing again, but then sighed and shook her head in a mock-lecturing way.

- You never learn, do ya, capt'n?


Sunday, January 15, 2006 3:00 PM


That turned out great Kitten!!!

I swear i rolled around on the floor laughing at the whole Jayne and Mal thing. LOL. well done, glad you sorted it out in the end.

Shiny work as ever. Keep writing!!! lol.

Sunday, January 15, 2006 3:15 PM


It ended to quickly!!! It was so funny! I was laughing as hard as Kaylee when she saw him! As soon as you think it's jsut starts up all over again! I cant wait for the other 7..or 8 is it? SQUEE! I love it! (10!)

Sunday, January 15, 2006 3:55 PM


yes! hehe, and he never does learn! come on it's mal we're talking bout here! lol. yay kit for writing this sequel. can't wait for more and you know i'm always happy to help :) love that river is now the sanest of them all ... oh wait, that can't be good!oh well, more wacky fun :P
stay shiny!

Sunday, January 15, 2006 4:46 PM


okay i'm sorta disappointd mal spent all night with jayne, because that means he didn't spend it with inara. damn damn damn! anyway, adorable as always. let's hear just what did happen with kaylee and simon....

lovin' it!

Sunday, January 15, 2006 5:59 PM


That last post was me, ShinyGeeket, btw.

Sunday, January 15, 2006 9:19 PM


Really, really funny. Very much enjoyed this and can't wait to read the others as and when they are posted. You might want to check your spelling but apart from that this was hi-larious fun! Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me

Sunday, January 15, 2006 10:48 PM


EHEHEH! oh this is just beautiful thank you SO MUCH! Oh man i loved this, though i have to agree that the fact that mal woke up with jayne means he was not with inara and i would have loved that. Oh whel if wishes were horses we'd all be eating steak... any way i loved this thank you so much! Oh and by the way incase you did not guess i would like to submit a request for Inara's POV on this.

Monday, January 16, 2006 4:45 PM


I love it Kitten,

errr Oldsoul if what u said was a joke... i don't get it, but if it wasn't... Steak comes from cows


Tuesday, January 17, 2006 9:27 AM


oh my LORD!!!! that was funny as hell...wonder why kaylee's ass is sore *nudge nudge wink wink* my smut-senses are tingling!!!


Tuesday, January 17, 2006 6:52 PM


ooooh! I can't wait to see the effects of the night on River and Inara!

Wednesday, January 18, 2006 5:32 AM


Oooooh funny, can't wait to hear about the rest of the crew!

Friday, January 20, 2006 9:14 AM


This is excellent.
Please hurry up with the next chapters.
Type faster!


Sunday, May 28, 2006 6:56 PM


OMG. Just read this and I couldn't stop laughing. Which is unfortunate as I was in the middle of a fudge covered brownie and ice-cream.
My keyboard will never be the same.
Looking forward to the rest of the crew's realizations.

Thursday, November 23, 2006 10:54 PM


oh this is going to be good


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