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BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - GENERAL
The New Haven Series; Post BDM; M/I, S/K; Continued From Birthdays & Barns: The crew comes into some well needed money, and a well earned trip to town actually looks like it might not go pear-shaped.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 1406 RATING: 9 SERIES: FIREFLY
A/N: Alright, so all of this is after the following fics...
Birthdays & Barns
The crew was celebrating.
They had come into some extra coin by way of the ever so prosperous Boss Tig. It seemed he had purchased himself a band new hovercraft for the spring, a Royce Mikado to be exact, what was all the rage in the Core. It was shipped to the skyplex, but the hitch was all of his ships were livestock transports, and none had the space nor finesse to take such precious cargo. So, he paid them five hundred credits, far more than the usual to make a special trip to pick up the slick pearl white craft that cost more than they had ever made. Mal pocketed some for savings and to further help his little ranch, but gave his entire crew the rest of the cut. The next day, they had loaded up in the old wagon converted to a sleigh, Tao and Nui on the harness, and ridden out to town for a day of fun. The ranch was fine, with the snow having rolled in and covered the prairie, rustlers weren't likely to steal anything as it was cold and easily would be easy to track. So they had some down time. Time to walk about, time to spend, have some fun.
Mal was driving the covered sleigh, Zoe out with him in front as the others were bundled up tight inside. The skis of the vehicle cut through the top crust of the snow, sliding readily into the softer powder underneath. The horses with their heavy winter coats gave the moment the sound of crunching and plodding hooves. Tao's mane was long, unfurled and tacky with bits of frost as he pulled with little effort, his tail however wrapped and folded. Bound close to his rump by some old thongs. Nui's tail was the same, yet River had put a few braids in the mare's dark mane, weaving in a handful of beads to express the femininity of the mare.
"Gonna buy some new sheets." Kaylee explained to Inara, Simon and River as they all sat in back, rocking to the sway of the transport. "Those flannel ones for the winter, and then some cocoa powder and a few other things so we got desserts for Christmas, and we can always save the rest for other special occasions." Turning, she admired all of their reactions. "What are you gonna do? Zoe?"
"Ammunition, new jacket I suppose, pocket the rest."
"Well, I'm in need of a few things." Inara explained, she was wearing a thick cloak with fur lining. Meilin was bundled up and resting in a sling inside the cloak, sleeping as that was one of her favorite pastimes. "Lotion, shampoo, soap, oil... all of the things you girls seem to like and borrow."
"Simon likes the body oil too." River announced, allowing her older sibling to be the target of glances from even the driver up front. "Makes him smell like jasmine."
Simon glared reproachfully.
She read his mind and glared back. "Liar." Shutting her eyes, she cheekily stuck out her tongue, then gave a massive smile.
Kaylee burst into giggles, Zoe chortled softly up front with an 'River' escaping her lips and Inara covered her mouth as she tried to keep manner.
"My Jackaroo likes ta smell purty?" Mal teased over the side of his shoulder. "All oiled soft of jasmine and...."
"I prefer being hygienic." Simon defended. "Which, is difficult..."
"Ai-ren." Kaylee soothed through her giggles. "Don't vindicate it, wu si shi dou na wu er wo ai zhi."
Though still flustered that River had outed him for giggles, Simon took it to heart. "I'll be saving my cut." Diverting attention off of his use of jasmine scented oil, he saw how Kaylee was curious as to why. "I have my reasons. River? Would you like to enlighten us on what your plans are or will you be telling the hygene secrets of the entire crew?"
"No, I just hadn't made fun at your expense yet. Turns over, Dr. Jasmine." River could pick up her brother was saving up for the future, for Kaylee. He wanted to buy some acres so he had property before getting a ring and making an honest woman out of her. It was a good plan, but then again that was Simon. "I want clothes, a sword and a cunning hat."
"Tall order there 'lil one." Mal talked from the front. "I hope you don't take ta impalin' Simon. Harassing him about his particular usage of jasmine oil is plenty good."
"Don't mind him." Inara sighed to Simon like a mother that didn't know what to do with her unruly child. "He shouldn't be bringing that up, considering he fancies my mango body cream."
Zoe chuckled up front as the others in the back did the same. "Mango, Sir?"
"Well... that uh..." Mal was good and flustered as his Jacks pulled smoothly through the fresh powder. Regardless he had been outed, he made up his own excuse and acceptance "like ta smell all tangy. What can I say." As they were at the very cusp of town, he pulled up to the livery. "Whoa, whoa team, whoa team." Parking the sleigh, he stepped down with Zoe. "You fine upstandin' misfits stay here while I get us square. Dong-ma?"
"Misfits." River scoffed as she pulled Boston out of her thick jacket.
"Biggest one just arrived." Simon announced as Jayne's enormous horse sidled up to the sleigh. Getting out of the back, he went over and began to unhitch their team.
"Damn straight." Jayne grinned, his knitted cap poking out underneath his flat brimmed Stetson. "Best git ta the saloon, first round's on me."
"Gotta park that hoofed monster b'fore you git lubricated." Mal reminded as he walked into the large barn with his second in command. "Y'low," he called out, searching for the owner of the establishment. "Got horses need ta be stabled."
From above a rope dropped and a man slid down, except he was the cause of much goggling. For the man, possibly younger than Simon, had nothing by way of anatomy below the knees. His thighs simply stopped and the rest of the pantleg as tucked under him. He was in a hoverchair, the piece of technology old and rusty in some parts but obviously useful as it kept what was left of him a good five feet tall. His arms were strong, compensating for the loss below, and he wore a thick jacket with scarf and knit cap pulled over his ears.
"Howdy." He said with a smile, as if there was nothing amiss.
Mal smiled, shaking his hand. "Hi, Malcolm Reynolds."
"This here's my foreman Zoe, rest outside are my crew." He looked the young man up and down, curious. "You in the war, son?"
"Yessir." The young pup nodded. "Joined up when I was eighteen, back as brown as a buffalo."
Mal saluted Wallace. "Honor to be in the presence of another soldier."
Zoe did the same. "My feelin' exactly."
"You browncoats too?" He said excitedly. "Hell, there ain't any others hundred miles 'round. Most died in the war or in the prisoner camps. Good ta see there's a few left."
"That it is." Mal reached into his pocket and took out a coin pouch. "Like ta buy you a drink and a smoke after you stable my horses."
"It's on the house." Wallace waved his hand off.
"No, no. That's what that drink and smoke are for. I intend ta pay." He insisted. "Now, what's your fare?"
"Three ponies, twenty bits." Accepting the coins, he nodded his head and pocketed them. "I'll see ta your ride's" Noticing Simon bringing in the horses the amiable paraplegic smiled. "Doctor Simon! You ride with these two?"
"I do." He passed the reins and traces over. "And Captain Reynolds is the most lionhearted, obstinate man I have ever had the pleasure of being under the heel of. Miss Frye works for him too."
"Aww... ya hear that?" Mal murmured to Zoe. "I think he's sweet on me."
"Well if'n Doc 'n Miss Kaylee work for ya, rest of your crew's gotta be as right as rain." He further amazed them by walking the horses over to tie them to a post so he could take off the harnesses. It was all done without using anything to steer the chair, it simply went. "Most agreeable people 'n the 'verse they are. Doc fixed the receptor for my chair so's it goes where my legs would have taken me." He took off his cap to show the patch on his head where he had been shaved to his scalp. An incision made right there to work on the receptor in his brain was now nothing more than a shrinking scar left by dissolvable stitches. The doc did good work.
"All of them are as pretty right, 'cept the big one." the captain responded, gesturing to the Sachem. "Don't think his mother trusts him, but he's big 'n scary and that's what he's worth."
"Hell I ain't all that bad." Jayne swung down off of Donner and lead him into the stable. "Am scary though." Unfastening the buckle on the saddle, he hoisted his entire rig off and shouldered it. "Where you want this 'un?"
"Over there." Wallace pointed as his hoverchair rose up so he could properly remove the terret off of Nui as she ate a bucket of hay. Like most females baring young, she had a never ending hunger, and meals and snacks never seemed to staid her anymore.
Jayne put Donner in a stall, draped his rig over the saddle horse next to it, and went over to the wagon with the others.
Mal saw everyone was gathered around, and he folded his arms. "Now, we're here ta celebrate. If you wanna shop 'n order off the coretex, fine. You wanna drink till the world's as soft as watercolor and as happy as a cartoon, fine. You wanna work some knots out with a woman," he saw Jayne's borderline gleeful leer "fine. You wanna go sing and be giddy? Fine. You can go sing atop a roof 'I'm A Pretty Shadow Gal' for all I care but I don't want no brawlin' lest someone else starts and you gotta finish. And if anyone'a you end up in that jail house I'll let that tin star keep you there till mornin', that clear?"
They all nodded.
"We're outta here an hour b'fore dark." He reminded, "I'll be at the saloon for the most part, anyone who wants can join me in a bottle of decent saki."
"Well, we're all shopping." Inara told him as River with Boston the shoulder cat and Kaylee clustered around. Her arms were hidden under the cloak with Meilin, as the cowl was up and sheltering her head. "And Simon's already offered to chauffeur."
"Though I may later join you for some saki." Simon replied.
Jayne's whoop of joy had them all turn towards the main street of Pryor. Low and behold, there was a catwagon. It was pulled by four white mules, bells on their worn black leather harnesses as their long ears swiveled to and fro. The wagon itself was a hoverwagon (making it illegal in the winter), floating above the snow and built somewhat like a gypsy wagon. It was painted plume purple, with 'Elegant Ladies' written on the side in caligraphy, along with a painting of a geisha with a fan covering a beguiling face. The roof was sloped in oriental fashion, and the windows were covered by satin curtains that had seen many a trail, hiding what flesh was to offer.
Driving the mule train was a man; tall and spindly like a young pine dressed in a suit that looked to be a fashion behind and a loose thread away from unraveling. He had on a thick, mangy fur coat of coyote, and a top hat with a roughed brim and the stains of summer sweat on the band. The scruffy face looked to need a barber, as well as the scraggly straw hair. Underneath all of that facial scruff was clammy skin tinged yellow, possibly from illness. Nonetheless he wore a smile as he pulled up to the saloon. Standing, he announced with great sway. "Come one, come all! Come and see the beauties that bless this very coach!"
Jayne took off like a dog scenting a butcher shop.
Inara and Zoe gave a look of subdued distain, whilst Mal and Simon had the same 'well, he's a lost cause' expression and Kaylee and River wore some curiosity.
"Women well trained in the art of amour and temptation! Fille de joie as lovely as empresses but as diverse in selection to suit any man's needs! From the Celestial Planet Shinon itself!" He sold to the growing crowd of lonely cattleprodders, eager for some trim. "I even have a young Sihnon gentleman if'n anyone is of that persuasion!"
"Sihnon?" Kaylee looked to Inara with confusion.
"Probably academy dropouts." She bristled.
Getting down, he walked to the back triumphantly, as if he was the deliverer of manna from the almighty himself. "I myself am Johnny Buck." Taking off his cap Johnny Buck bowed with such over exaggeration he nearly touched his boots. If he was ill, he didn't act it. "Traveler of great lands and worlds, so I may bring to the noble Shadow men the finest courtesans in the system." With a smooth gesture, he grabbed the back door and opened it. The metal steps slid out, and a selection of women wafted out. There were ten women, some in corsets and bustles and old silk dresses, and some in silk kimonos, there was also a man in an old suit, though his face wasn't painted so.
The men went to choose quickly. The boy whore was actually snatched first, but second was two ladies Jayne nearly picked up and threw over his shoulder. Two of the healthiest ones, with bright eyes, oval hips and ample bosoms.
He had a huge grin plastered on his mouth as he hungrily eyed his red and blonde prizes. "Aren't you two just the purttiest treats I dun ever come across."
River bolted after Jayne. "WAIT!"
He stopped, and growled at her. "What the gorram..."
Jumping, she knocked his stetson off and swiped his knit cap off of his head.
Putting it on her head, she explained. "Don't sully creation of mother's love." Bending down, she picked up his other hat. "Subjecting it to watching your promiscuous ways, the hat is tired of watching sex. It needs a break." She held out his other hat, that apparently, did not have feelings.
Jayne looked her over, and snatched his stetson. Turning to his accolades of plundering the whore wagon, he walked away, explaining everything. "Don't mind her none, she's as wooly as a mammoth.”
Mal sighed with a bit of relief. Turning to Zoe, he said “Well, now that he’s occupied I reckon there won’t be any unforeseen trouble.”
“Ni ni-xiang chi geng shan ren!”
The Broken Saddle Saloon, erupted into the sounds of a body being flung against the bar, and glasses shattering onto the floor, spraying a glimmer of yellow light as the facets in the shards picked up the light of the kerosene lamps. A few people jumped in surprise, but most just looked on as the rowdy behavior continued.
Mal and Zoe looked on, though they were stunned as Simon had just thrown a man just a touch shorter than Jayne, onto the bar. The man being the son of none other than the land baron who had just paid them to deliver his hovercraft.
“Zai zhi wo-shi bu yi ruo, zhong pin, he-xin ai-zi!” Bailey Tigg roared drunkenly, flat on his back on the bar, his feet mule kicked Simon away, sending the shorter, equally angry doctor into a support beam. Rolling off of the bar, he rushed over and grabbed Simon by the shirt. Slamming him against the beam, He pulled his fist back to clock the lightweight in the face. However Simon, face snarling, reached down and grabbed a beer stein from the table. Swinging it at the same time as the punch, they were both hit, Simon with a fist to the nose, Bailey with a stein to his golden scalp. The glass broke, Tigg stumbled back, dazed, as Tam cast the remains of the stein handle to the floor and charged.
Mal seized him by the shoulder and collar of his wool waistcoat, yanking him back before he could pummel Bailey. “Ok, easy Sport.” Dragging him to the door by the scruff like a disobedient puppy as Zoe went to the bar keep to sort things out and get Simon out of trouble. “Shi dao, you-xi ri-zi shi wan.”
“Don’t worry.” The bar keep, a rather rough ridden prairie gal named Footsie said as she pulled out a mop to clean up. “Reckon Bailey deserved it, he always does.”
“Well, that makes things easier.” Zoe strode across the floor, glass crackling under her boots, and went to fetch their winter coats, hats, scarves and the like.
“Simon?” Kaylee gawked as she stood at the door with her burlap sack of goods. Inara slack jawed with her that their normally level headed, polite Simon Tam had obviously been in a fight. What with all the glass strewn about, and Bailey Tigg crumpled on the floor.
River, appeared unsurprised in her new wears. A brown leather jacket she had bought used at another store, similar in fashion to her black one, and a samurai sword she kept sung to her back. To further add to her appearance, she had on snowpants, slightly baggy and navy, over her combat boots with a sweater underneath her jacket. She had also had Jayne's hat, which was so big it slipped just above her eyes. With the way the flaps curved out though, and her sword, she reminded Mal of a picture of Ghengis Khan. Ghengis Khan with a pom-pom adorned on his head, but Khan none the less. Seeing Simon, slightly inebriated face confused whilst being drug out of the bar past them, she put her hands on her hips, reading his mind, and turned to explain to Kaylee. “Boys are stupid.”
“That they are.” Mal grunted from outside.
wu si shi dou na wu er wo ai zhi: my opinions is all that matters and I like it
Ni ni-xiang chi geng shan ren!: You backwards rednecked hillbilly!
Zai zhi wo-shi bu yi ruo, zhong pin, he-xin ai-zi!: At least I'm not a weak, inbred, core midget!
Shi dao, you-xi ri-zi shi wan: time to go home, playdate's over.
**As always, the writer appreciates all comments whether they be positive, negative, or suggestions.**
Tuesday, April 15, 2008 8:12 AM
Tuesday, April 15, 2008 5:48 PM
Wednesday, April 16, 2008 4:34 AM
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