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BLUE SUN ROOM FAN FICTION - ROMANCE
Inara's personal log entries from her time as a crewmember of Serenity and on. Post BDM, standalone fanfic.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 1276 RATING: 9 SERIES: FIREFLY
Disclaimer: All characters and places contained in this text belong to Joss Whedon and Mutant Enemy.
INARA SERRA'S PERSONAL LOG:
I've decided it would be a good idea to keep a personal journal, diary if you will, of my time out here in the black. My old mentors would scold me for doing something such as documenting my thoughts and feelings about my life. Still, I feel that it is important on this new venture into the 'verse.
I've found a strange place to live, a Firefly called Serenity. The captain is a man named Malcolm Reynolds. He's a sarcastic, pompous bastard, not to mention a crook. But still, I wanted new things. I wanted to see the other side of life. I have my own personal shuttle, so I think I'll be all right.
The crew is pretty nice, even if their captain is somewhat of a jerk. There's this cute young woman named Kaylee, we're becoming fast friends. She's sweet and a genius when it comes to mechanics.
So, my life on Serenity promises interest. If only I can manage not to kill her captain.
END OF RECORDING
Work has been good lately. For me and the crewmembers of Serenity. Most of their work has been illegal, mind, but it's been good none the less.
Kaylee and I have been enjoying ourselves of late. She and I went shopping last planet we were on and bought her some nice new hair things. She loves it when I do her hair for her.
Mal seems less a jerk every day. I see a deeper side of him every now and then. A side many think he left in Serenity Valley. He shows a great deal of love for Serenity and her crew, and would do anything to keep them safe.
I admire this. He's still one of the biggest annoyances I've ever met. He makes me... *sigh* nevermind, I'm not even going to go there.
I can't believe it! How could he? How could she? No... I can't blame Nandi, she couldn't have possibly known, not until after the fact at least.
I can't do this anymore. What was I thinking? Who was I kidding? A companion could never be allowed feelings for the captain of a ship of pirating nature. No I was being foolish.
I can't stay here anymore, I can't risk losing myself like that and getting hurt again. I can't chance staying longer and having it be too hard to leave. I can't get tied down to this place, I can't belong to this family.
It comes down to this: I have to tell him I'm leaving. He won't understand. He thinks I don't care. It will break his heart, but it's nothing to the pain in mine. He'll get over it, move on. He always does, can never stay in one place for too long.
I'll leave for both our sakes. He won't have me around to mess with his schedule or anything and he won't be messing with my emotions. A companion is supposed to keep her feelings in check.
Well... Today's the day. I'm leaving Serenity. It's one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but not as hard as I had imagined. And it's better this way...
*twenty second silence*
Earlier, Kaylee had a capture and was documenting every second she could. I'll miss her terribly.
I'm going back to Sihnon to teach at House Madrassa. I can accomplish much of my work there as well.
I wish this were easier. I wish my heart didn't feel like lead about to fall to the floor...
I didn't think I would ever set foot on this ship again. It's good to be home. I missed her so much.
Not as much as I missed him. He came for me, to save me. Came for me himself. It almost made my heart burst from fear, he could've been killed.
Kaylee was glad to see me. I missed her very much. Too bad I had to come back under such circumstances.
That man, the one that held me captive and attacked Mal, truly believes killing River is the right thing to do. He honestly thinks the poor girl is evil. I think he ought to look in the mirror.
But at least I'm home.
Today is a sad day. It is also a happy day. Today, we had a funeral for some good people, good friends. Today, the truth was told.
I've decided I'm going to stay. Who knows, maybe I'll give it a shot with Mal... No. No maybes. I will give it my all.
Today I realized life was too short and too cold to deny yourself the things you want most. At some point you have to stop and realize you have to accept the pleasures it gives you as well as the sorrows.
Career is wonderful, but not at the expense of those you love. Not at the expense of your heart.
END OF RECORDING
Thursday, January 25, 2007 7:23 PM
Thursday, January 25, 2007 10:03 PM
Friday, January 26, 2007 7:18 AM
Friday, January 26, 2007 12:18 PM
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