NRKANGEL'S BLOG

nRkangel

Is There Ever a Wrong Time to Celebrate Foolish Optimism? :)
Friday, September 17, 2004

13 days remaining...

Getting a little prolific here, but as time grows short, I keep wanting to write stuff down someplace.

What a great Friday! I had lunch with the two ladies in our office as a kind of going-away lunch. We decided to make the company pay and went to a great restaurant called Pappillon, a marvelous little French Restaurant. The ambiance was "vrai fantastique!" and the food... Lobster dumplings in a lobster cream sauce... a buttery tenderloin and a Romaine salad with a light vinegrette dressing and walnuts that had been sugar coated and caramelized... whoa! I better enjoy being spoiled while I still can...

Still, the best part wasn't the food or the ambiance... it was being able to sit down with these two ladies and gripe!

Typically we're in separate sections of the office and don't get a chance to just chat much, so it was a lot of fun swapping stories and talking about what we saw as the company flaws (many) and the possibilites looking forward (few). We also discussed my reasons for leaving which dovetailed into their reasons for not wanting to stay. Both were actually thinking about their options for leaving in the 2005 timeframe.

Unlike true gossiping though, it had nothing to do with bashing anyone or saying anything bad about anyone in the company. It was more talking about a company that has great people, but doesn't seem to be able to find it's butt with both hands!

Also, I finally told someone in our company what I'm really leaving the company to do! As predicted, they were tremendously surprised. Who the hell leaves a good job to do something crazy like making a movie? But they were very happy that I was going to start doing what I loved. Just the thought of getting started is enough to give me a charge nowadays. Rod and I must have spent at least half-an-hour talking about equipment and budgets and schedules just this morning.

Even more good news today! (Today is really making up for what's been a so-so week emotionally.) I was told about my severence package today and it's about as good as I could hope for! If the company had been laying me off instead of having me leave, I probably would have done a lot better, but I'm not complaining! It'll make a big difference when it comes to what I'm able to devote to the movie's budget. (With everything we can muster going into the production, we're literally betting our futures on whether or not we can do this. New motto: "Faith is Really Diet Food.")

So why am I so doggoned happy?

I AM THE ONE AND ONLY!!
-Chesney Hawks (Lost song from the 80's...I feel old just listing it!!)

Lyrics
Call me. Call me by my name or,
Call me by my number.
Put me through it.
I'll still be doing it the way I do it
And yet,
You try to make me forget
Who I really am
Don't tell me, I know best,
I'm not the same as all the rest!

I am the one and only!
Nobody I'd rather be.
I am the one and only!
Can't take that away from me!

I've been a player in the crowd scene
A flicker on the big screen.
My soul embraces
One more in a million faces.
High hopes and aspirations
Ideas, above my station, maybe.
But all this time I've tried
to walk with dignity and pride...

[Chorus]

I can wear this uniform
Without some compromises!
Because you'll find we come
In different shapes and sizes!
No one can be myself like I can
For this job, I'm the best man
And while this may be true-
You are the one and only YOU!

[Chorus]



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