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| Regretting What I Said...
By valeriebean
Sunday, May 13, 2007 03:14
TIMES READ: 1667
RATING: 9
An absolutely hilarious, underhanded apology from Inara to Mal. Inara tries to take back some hurtful things she yelled at Mal when he decided to defend her honor.
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| A.N. Based on the Christine Lavin song "Regretting What I Said..." which is even more hilarious than this filk and I recommend you find and listen to it if you don't know it already. As for this, think sweet melody and folk guitar. The italicized bit is spoken by Inara pre-music.
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This song is titled: "Regretting what I said when you barged into my shuttle at 2AM to tell me that come sunrise you were going to leave your bunk, go downstairs, take the hover mule, drive into town, and shoot my most recent client in the head, not that I wouldn've stopped you, you wouldn't make it past security anyway, I already black marked the man, I can't expect you to understand civilized justice, but I don't need you defending my honor and if you're really so protective, DON'T call me whore!!!"
And it's subtitled "A Musical Apology."
In this song, I attempt to take back most of what I shouted at your back from the top of the catwalk.
I didn't mean it when I said, 'I hope
The support beams on the upper catwalk snap
And you crash to the floor.'
And I was joking when I said,
'I hope you crack your head
And get mangled by the cargo-bay door.'
And I was kidding when I said, 'I hope
A transport ship flying far to low
Hits and makes a pancake out of you.'
I'm sorry...
I'm sorry...
Isn't it amazing what a woman like me will do?
And I really don't want to see your mule on the 59th Steet Bridge
Flip over
And crash through the rail.
And I'd feel bad if when you reached town you were
Mistaken for a local sex offender,
Arrested, beaten up, and thrown in jail.
And I really don't want to see you getting radiation poisoning
From the metal detector that all visitors
And staff at this client's house must walk through.
I'm sorry...
Forgive me...
For all the mean things I said to you.
You thought I'd stopped taking clients.
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha, surprise!
But I really don't want to see you
Take a fatal chest wound from my client's bodyguard
When a simple little grazing would suffice,
Would suffice.
And I'm sorry that I said 'I hope
Serenity gets land-locked, seized, auctioned,
And sold off for scrap.'
And I'm sorry that I said,
'I hope the airlock fails
And you're sucked into the Black.'
And I'm sorry for all the critical things
I said about Serenity
Even though we both know they're true.
I'm sorry...
Forgive me...
I'm swallowing my pride,
I'd feel so guilty if you died!
Oh, I'm sorry,
But I'm still mad at you.
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redhead |
Sunday, May 13, 2007 - 04:56 |
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yes, yes, I chuckled! In fact, I can't stop grinning.
"And I'd feel bad if when you reached town you were
Mistaken for a local sex offender,
Arrested, beaten up, and thrown in jail."
very funny.
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Hehehe.. funny... I really would like to hear Inara sing it..
"And I'm sorry for all the critical things
I said about Serenity
Even though we both know they're true." Hahahahahahahahaha!
"But I really don't want to see you
Take a fatal chest wound from my client's bodyguard
When a simple little grazing would suffice,
Would suffice." Also very funny!
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EmpireX |
Sunday, May 13, 2007 - 12:46 |
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LOL! *grins* That was brilliant! But now I want to see Mal's POV or reaction to that little song...
And then what about a duet?
=P
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Huh....Mal's been at it again, has he? Not really surprising, since that man has some weird perspective where only he can seemingly get away with calling Inara a whore without physical coming to the person uttering the slander;)
Holy Hell was this hilarious, valeriebean! I could totally imagine Inara singing this to Mal as a backhanded apology for screaming epithets at him one night after he's gone and done his boob routine;)
BEB
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holy shift--you know the rest--!!! you know Christine Lavin songs?! and HOW DID I MISS THIS ONE THE FIRST TIME AROUND?!
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