GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Imponderable Water Cooler- Equal in your eyes

POSTED BY: MSG
UPDATED: Monday, February 26, 2007 13:45
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Monday, February 26, 2007 7:49 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


*squeaks under the force of the huggle and rubs her ribs*
'Morning Jimi-bear. And Jonny. And DTH just because I love her and MsG, and anyone else my tired, addled brain has forgotten about...
My internet decided to kick me off for awhile earlier. Don't know why.
Also, I am well on my way to being the Smash Brothers Queen! I have beat 100 man and 3 minute melee with all the characters and now I'm working on getting more than 100 on 3-minute melee. Oh, and I've gotten over 100 and in some cases over 300 KOs in the endless melee with every character! (I don't really expect everyone to understand this, but I'm excited about it!) Next up will be the 15 minute melee, which hence far I have only beat with the invincible Donkey Kong.
That's my news. I can't tell if it's sad that's my news or what...


Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 7:49 AM

ZZETTA13


I enjoy getting personal hellos and I like giving them as well. The down side is that it takes a while to type everyones name and if you happen to accidentaly leave someone out they may want to come after you with a blowgun

Anyhoo I just want to say "Hi" to everyone here (waves) Hello,MSG, PR, Mav, Penguin, Hobbleit, RIMG, Jonny, Rugbug, NVG, Odds, YinYang, CaliforniaKaylee,DeskTopH, Macqyver, HK, Asortafairytale, Versy, Rhyianan, Madga and any other browncoat I may have missed.

It's a beautiful day here so I'm headed outside.Everybody have a good one, Z

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Monday, February 26, 2007 7:56 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


Your news is good news Rose-doll, and no, you shouldn't be sad about it.

You are all invited to come and visit me whenever you like, as our weather today is in the low 70s, clear, with a light breeze.

~jimi
SFC Alexander, Chief Medic for the 76th Indepentent Army Battalion
In the beginning the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry and is widely considered as a bad move.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:05 AM

MAVOURNEEN


Quote:

Originally posted by JonnyQuest:
Quote:

Originally posted by Mavourneen:
Ever since we got one of those Tempur-Pedic mattress pads (memory foam), I can't feel ANY bed movement. That stuff is amazing.


You talk like that's a good thing...(?)




If you slept with a man who kicks and jumps around in his sleep... Nevermind!


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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:08 AM

HOBBLEIT


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
*squeaks under the force of the huggle and rubs her ribs*
'Morning Jimi-bear. And Jonny. And DTH just because I love her and MsG, and anyone else my tired, addled brain has forgotten about...
My internet decided to kick me off for awhile earlier. Don't know why.
Also, I am well on my way to being the Smash Brothers Queen! I have beat 100 man and 3 minute melee with all the characters and now I'm working on getting more than 100 on 3-minute melee. Oh, and I've gotten over 100 and in some cases over 300 KOs in the endless melee with every character! (I don't really expect everyone to understand this, but I'm excited about it!) Next up will be the 15 minute melee, which hence far I have only beat with the invincible Donkey Kong.
That's my news. I can't tell if it's sad that's my news or what...



I don't understand it but it sounds good.

Anyways hello to everyone. Hope you're all well. I won't give any personal hellos because mostly i can't be arsed.

******************************

http://www.myspace.com/muddy_waters

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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:14 AM

FUTUREMRSFILLION


*snicker snicker*

You said Winnie the Pooh

*snicker giggle snort*



Sorry, elementary school moment there


----
Bestower of Titles, Designer of Tshirts, Maker of Mottos, Keeper of the Pyre

I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"

FORSAKEN original


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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:19 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Quote:

Originally posted by FutureMrsFIllion:
*snicker snicker*

You said Winnie the Pooh

*snicker giggle snort*

Sorry, elementary school moment there


I love it!!!


"Well, here I am...Does that seem right to you?"

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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:22 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


* glomps FMF just because he can *



~jimi
SFC Alexander, Chief Medic for the 76th Indepentent Army Battalion
In the beginning the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry and is widely considered as a bad move.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:23 AM

DESKTOPHIPPIE


Hmph. So it's just me then. Might have known! *is ashamed*

(I'm not really ashamed... I just like that smilie and never get to use it)

Believe it or not, it ISN'T raining in Dublin today. No rain and beating the English at Rugby. The end is nigh!!! It's the only explanation!!!

*hugs PR back*

Personal hellos to everyone




Banners, avatars and other fun stuff at www.desktophippie.com

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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:36 AM

MSG


Do tell Mav

So ok I had something to say and then I got distracted by my kids ( who are watching a documentary and have a million questions about why and what and such)

EDIT- FMF!!!! it's FMF!!!! Oh how we've missed you:) HUGS... actually snickering over Winnie the Pooh is more of a junior high thing...don't know if that's more or less mature

"I'm not all that interested in the mental health of people who want to kill me. "- Leroy Jethro Gibbs



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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:40 AM

HELL'S KITTEN


Quote:

Originally posted by JonnyQuest:
And now for a bit of old business (well not that old; the end of last thread):
Quote:

Originally posted by Hell's Kitten:
Quote:

Originally posted by JonnyQuest:
With the possible exception of Hell's Kitten, I think we can agree that cruelty to animals is a bad thing. (HK would ask us to carefully define cruelty and offer up some blah blah about means to an end.)

Huh?

Where the f did that come from?

*JQ digs around madly in his exhaustive FFF.net quote archive*
Quote:

Originally posted by Hell's Kitten: ...but it may not be pure coincidence that I work for a company specializing in cardiac implants.
and Animal studies are part of the requirements for the devices we develop. (You know. Instead of putting something untested and unproven into some poor, fragile human being.) Guinea pigs are too small for implants; we generally use other animals.... We even saved a race horse! But that's another story and I'm not sure if patient confidentiality would be in play...
We know what you do for a living...!

And so, by that, you figure it's okay to insinuate that I'm all for cruelty to animals?

(Saving the life of a racehorse is cruel? Saving the lives of many canines is cruel?)

You really have no idea what I do for a living, and I don't appriciate your baseless intimations.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:48 AM

RHYIANAN


I have a question, although it takes quite a bit of setting up to ask. This last weekend, I went to visit my bf at his school, driving for over 10 hours to get there (one way, I might add). His school is mostly guys, with the ratio being roughly 2-1. While there, I became increasingly aggrevated by the behavior of his roommate and his friends. They were crude and acting stupid (as in mentally challenged). When I began to rather loudly proclaim my low opinion of the behavior I had encountered (making sure that the offending people could hear, even though they were in another room) my bf and close friend that went up there with me said that this was how most people are and that I should get used to it. When I tried to tell them that no, most people are not like that, using examples from my own college, both of them merely said I was spoiled and sheltered. So I put the question to all of you: Are most individuals crude and unintelligent and is it too much to ask that they act like civilized human beings instead of animals? Should I just "get used to it"? Or should I hold my view where the uncivilized are few and far between (but somehow were concentrated in that one spot)?

edit* HK, I believe what he is saying is that from what you have said previously, you would not be opposed to testing products on animals, which some people see as animal cruelty. He is merely suggesting that you might be more prone to split hairs on the definition of cruelty than most of the other people on here.

disclaimer:
(I do not necessarily condone or agree with what he means, but I do understand where he is coming from)


I'm a leaf on the wind

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Monday, February 26, 2007 8:53 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Quote:

Originally posted by Hell's Kitten:
And so, by that, you figure it's okay to insinuate that I'm all for cruelty to animals?

(Saving the life of a racehorse is cruel? Saving the lives of many canines is cruel?)

You really have no idea what I do for a living, and I don't appriciate your baseless intimations.


My attempts at being intimate with you are based strictly on the photos you post of an entity you claim does not exist.

You have pets yourself, so for me to draw that conclusion would be completely illogical. Saving the life of a horse is wonderful. I'm sure RugBug could write volumes about that. But you haven't blessed us with your tale yet. Saving the lives of dogs is likewise a noble pursuit.

But please don't try to hide behind your heroism, because we all know you're all about vivisection and mad electrodes. It's because of people like you that the rest of us have to suffer wave after wave of chicken torture videos put out by PETA. We also happen to know that you are an Alien (forbidden in the 'Verse) working under cover, and every child knows all you live for is anal probes and (ugh) animal husbandry.

We will not be fooled again.


"Well, here I am...Does that seem right to you?"

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:04 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


No, it is not too much to ask people to be civilized. The only issue I would see would be that you went into their place and wanted to tell them how to act. Regardless of whether their actions are right or not, if you were visiting them then there isn't a whole lot you can say. By no means should you just "get used to it". You should associate with people that you feel comfortable associating with, and not lower your standards for any reasons other than your own. I know that you have to deal with them because they are your BFs roommate, but I would personally recommend ignoring them as best as you can.

~jimi
SFC Alexander, Chief Medic for the 76th Indepentent Army Battalion
In the beginning the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry and is widely considered as a bad move.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:11 AM

RHYIANAN


I realize that I was on their turf and such, but I would think that common curtesy is universal. However, the way my friends acted saying "this is normal, everyone is like that" is really what set me off and what is sparking my question, not the behavior itself.


I'm a leaf on the wind

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:17 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
I have a question, although it takes quite a bit of setting up to ask...snip, snip...So I put the question to all of you: Are most individuals crude and unintelligent and is it too much to ask that they act like civilized human beings instead of animals? Should I just "get used to it"? Or should I hold my view where the uncivilized are few and far between (but somehow were concentrated in that one spot)?

edit* HK, I believe what he is saying is that from what you have said previously, you would not be opposed to testing products on animals, which some people see as animal cruelty. He is merely suggesting that you might be more prone to split hairs on the definition of cruelty than most of the other people on here.

disclaimer:
(I do not necessarily condone or agree with what he means, but I do understand where he is coming from)



Thank you, my new best friend!

I would say about your BF's animal friends that it probably very difficult to say how many folk are uncivilized v. civilized. Regardless of that, anytime you find yourself in an unfamiliar setting I would posit the chance of finding behavioral norms being different from yours are quite high. That said, I don't believe you should ever have to compromise your beliefs for the comfort of another (but stay away from places like Saudi Arabia if you are both free-thinking and female), but pick your battles. In some cases, it's just not going to be worth the effort. In others it might make all the difference in the world. BF should also be sensitive to how you feel, right or wrong. But that's just MO.

As fur Hell's Kitten an' me, well we got "history", not the kind you'll find in the books; ours is strictly a between the lines and over the line kind of relationship. All about pushing buttons and looking for kinks (you pick the definition of "kink"). And of course, she will have to deny she even cares lest anyone make the mistake of thinking she has a heart.




"Well, here I am...Does that seem right to you?"

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:18 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


It's definitely not normal. At least not how I was reared. (but then again, I don't classify myself as normal very often).

One would hope that common courtesy was universal, but along those same lines, one would hope that common sense was too.

~jimi
SFC Alexander, Chief Medic for the 76th Indepentent Army Battalion
In the beginning the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry and is widely considered as a bad move.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:23 AM

RUGBUG


Good morning. I'm back from a fabulous weekend that included riding my horse, who managed to behave himself despite less than ideal circumstances, riding one of my trainer's horses on the beach...which has got to be one of the coolest things to do EVER, and

Select to view spoiler:


taking down my Christmas tree.

Lest you all think I had a firebomb of dead pine in the living room, I went the cheap way and had an artificial tree. Save the lack of lovely pine tree scent and the apparently very needed reasons for taking down tree in a timely manner... the artificial served it's purpose well...and cost nary a cent. But alas, it is finally stored neatly in the garage and my living room no longer glows with the warm radience of a Christmas lights. 'Tis a happy/sad day, indeed.



Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
When I began to rather loudly proclaim my low opinion of the behavior I had encountered (making sure that the offending people could hear, even though they were in another room) my bf and close friend that went up there with me said that this was how most people are and that I should get used to it. When I tried to tell them that no, most people are not like that, using examples from my own college, both of them merely said I was spoiled and sheltered. So I put the question to all of you: Are most individuals crude and unintelligent and is it too much to ask that they act like civilized human beings instead of animals? Should I just "get used to it"? Or should I hold my view where the uncivilized are few and far between (but somehow were concentrated in that one spot)?



Hi Rhyianan...I just wanted to comment on this. While I agree that it would be nice to expect people to be polite...they won't always be. And you proclaiming that they were offensive, was in itself offensive, to them...and to anyone who calls them friends. If you didn't like the behaviour, remove yourself. Tell your boyfriend in private, and no longer spend time in their company. It is the only solution that will keep you from wanting to pull your hair out...and them from thinking you are a total stuffy bitch (which may not matter to you at this point in life...but what happens when it is co-workers who you can't stand?)

Quote:

Originally posted by JonnyQuest:
do I detect a prejudice against…midgets??? Okay so you’re tall (you’re tall, aren’t you?). So? Are we to find Amazon’s suddenly unattractive simply because of your stature?



Nope, not really tall, but somehow always surrounded by really not tall men. (I'm 5' 6 1/2")

Quote:

Originally posted by JonnyQuest:
Quote:

Originally posted by RugBug:
And may all the impondering water coolers have weekends of sunshine, puppy dogs and roses.


I found all kinds of references to sunshine and puppy dogs and puppy dogs and roses, not a single one with all three, yet it sounds so very familiar it’s driving me crazy. What’s that from?



It's not really FROM anything. I combined it willy-nilly. It's part Buffy-ism, part me-ism.

Edited to fix some tags and to say on the animal cruelty issue: You might be surprised to find out where I stand. Beating of animals, improper care, etc is bad. I'm not against humane slaughter. Someone thinks horse...or dog or cat or squirrel or whatever...tastes good, more power to them (although eating pet animals would be problematic in this country. It's just no okay if your neighbor decides Rover or Fluffy looks like a good choice for dinner Sunday. ) Just make sure the animals are not put in unnecessary pain. Nor am I against necessary animal testing.

***************
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:33 AM

RIVERISMYGODDESS


Quote:

Originally posted by RugBug:
Nope, not really tall, but somehow always surrounded by really not tall men. (I'm 5' 6 1/2")



As is the case with most of you lovely Browncoat lasses, I have about a foot on ya height-wise.


I am going home. Y'all have a shiny evening. If I can get my computer to work, I might talk to you from there.

*hugs* for everyone except the people I am ignoring

*an extra hug for DTH for messin' with her*

~jimi
SFC Alexander, Chief Medic for the 76th Indepentent Army Battalion
In the beginning the universe was created. This made a lot of people very angry and is widely considered as a bad move.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:37 AM

MSG


Jonny- hmm maybe you should put quotes around things when you're sarcastic..I know what you meant ( and I still wanna see those breast implants for Guinea Pigs sometime Hell's Kitten 'cause rodents have the right to improve themselves appearance wise and all...it'd help their self esteem and our world needs slutty guinea pig strippers because reality tv has become dull of late)

OK funniest thing I have seen in a long time. One of my students has swollen lips right now because he was outside scraping ice off of the car and decided to kiss his reflection in the rear view mirror. Naturally his lips froze to the mirror and he bruised his lips pulling himself off the mirror..LOL!!



"I'm not all that interested in the mental health of people who want to kill me. "- Leroy Jethro Gibbs



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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:41 AM

RHYIANAN


Quote:

Originally posted by RugBug:

Hi Rhyianan...I just wanted to comment on this. While I agree that it would be nice to expect people to be polite...they won't always be. And you proclaiming that they were offensive, was in itself offensive, to them...and to anyone who calls them friends. If you didn't like the behaviour, remove yourself. Tell your boyfriend in private, and no longer spend time in their company. It is the only solution that will keep you from wanting to pull your hair out...and them from thinking you are a total stuffy bitch (which may not matter to you at this point in life...but what happens when it is co-workers who you can't stand?)



I actually thought about erasing that before I posted, but left it in because it's who I am. I will never have to deal with those people again, so I made my opinions rather well known. I don't believe in talking about people behind their backs....anything I have to say about them, I am more than willing to say to their face (or in a way that they'll hear me say it). I find that more polite than gossiping about them. If this makes me a bitch, so be it. That said, if it was a person I actually had to deal with everyday for the next few years, then I would stay silent and use avoidance tactics, but in the situation I was in, there was nowhere else to go.


I'm a leaf on the wind

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:43 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


Quote:

While there, I became increasingly aggrevated by the behavior of his roommate and his friends. They were crude and acting stupid (as in mentally challenged).

Eh, I think everyone has their own way of blowing off steam, and to a stranger that way may look stupid, or crude, or downright strange. Like I mentioned in the last imponderables/water cooler thread during the conversation on feminism, the industry I work in is 90% male, and we definitely fit the "work hard, play hard" mentality. For the particular group within the industry that I hang out with, that often translates to "work 80 hour weeks, then get completely drunk", but it can also mean blowing off steam playing World of Warcraft or Wii Sports together after 70+ hour weeks, and it always, always means a lot of crude humor. The guys try to keep the sexual humor to a minimum when I'm around, but everything else is fair game.

I'm also the oldest of six children, and we were all labeled as both hyperactive and "talented and gifted" when we were young -- and we all have hypermobile joints. All that led to very loud family dinners -- all but the youngest two are adults now, and family dinners still haven't quieted down -- full of movie quotes (we have crazy memories for that sort of thing), strange voices, inside jokes, and competitions to see who can do the weirdest thing with their joints at the dinner table. Do other people think we're weird, crude, and possibly a bit touched in the head? Of course! And I was horribly embarrassed to bring friends over when I was younger, because of the bizarre flights of bodily-function-noises my brothers would go into. But that's my family, that's our way of blowing off steam, and I love my siblings for it.

So all that to say, weird is simply a point of view. What is weird to you is perfectly normal to someone else, and vice versa. That said, if the behavior of someone you don't know very well is making you uncomfortable, you should feel free to remove yourself from the situation. Let your boyfriend know that you are uncomfortable with the behavior, and would prefer to go somewhere else. If he wants to hang out with his friends and you at the same time, let him know what behavior specifically makes you uncomfortable, and maybe try for a neutral, public location, rather than where they live. But I don't think it's fair to go into someone else's house and tell them that their behavior isn't acceptable. To each their own, right?


Edited to add: Another thing you might want to keep in mind with this situation in particular is that these are your boyfriend's friends and there's probably a reason he likes hanging out with them. He may act that way when you're not around, and so criticizing his friends' behavior is really criticizing him. Just something to think about.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Monday, February 26, 2007 9:50 AM

ZEEK


Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
I have a question, although it takes quite a bit of setting up to ask. This last weekend, I went to visit my bf at his school, driving for over 10 hours to get there (one way, I might add). His school is mostly guys, with the ratio being roughly 2-1. While there, I became increasingly aggrevated by the behavior of his roommate and his friends. They were crude and acting stupid (as in mentally challenged). When I began to rather loudly proclaim my low opinion of the behavior I had encountered (making sure that the offending people could hear, even though they were in another room) my bf and close friend that went up there with me said that this was how most people are and that I should get used to it. When I tried to tell them that no, most people are not like that, using examples from my own college, both of them merely said I was spoiled and sheltered. So I put the question to all of you: Are most individuals crude and unintelligent and is it too much to ask that they act like civilized human beings instead of animals? Should I just "get used to it"? Or should I hold my view where the uncivilized are few and far between (but somehow were concentrated in that one spot)?


I'm really going to need some explanation about what you think was rude. I really can't compare it to what's "normal" if all I know is you think it's not normal. Obviously my first reaction would be to say "not normal" is in fact not normal. Though that's just unfair to the rude bunch.

So basically give us some dirt to work with.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:03 AM

RHYIANAN


Dirt to work with, huh.

Well, there's the crude jokes that were completely out of place (who makes crude jokes about Mario 64?). One of the guys somehow stole a megaphone and they were going up and down the hallway of the dorms either yelling into it or pressing the button to make it make a feedback noise (high pitched and piercing). People were coming into the room to "meet" me, which for some consisted of looking me over and practically undressing me with their eyes with my boyfriend standing right there. There was more, but I'm sure you can get the picture.


I'm a leaf on the wind

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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:06 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Yeesh, y'all work fast. Been tryin' to catch up between stuff all morning and it seems a bit futile.
Did I see FMF up there somewhere?

Well, back to work I go. Love to everyone 'cause y'all are the shiniest buncha folks a fella like me can hope to run across.



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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:07 AM

RUGBUG


Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
Quote:

Originally posted by RugBug:

Hi Rhyianan...I just wanted to comment on this. While I agree that it would be nice to expect people to be polite...they won't always be. And you proclaiming that they were offensive, was in itself offensive, to them...and to anyone who calls them friends. If you didn't like the behaviour, remove yourself. Tell your boyfriend in private, and no longer spend time in their company. It is the only solution that will keep you from wanting to pull your hair out...and them from thinking you are a total stuffy bitch (which may not matter to you at this point in life...but what happens when it is co-workers who you can't stand?)



I actually thought about erasing that before I posted, but left it in because it's who I am. I will never have to deal with those people again, so I made my opinions rather well known. I don't believe in talking about people behind their backs....anything I have to say about them, I am more than willing to say to their face (or in a way that they'll hear me say it). I find that more polite than gossiping about them. If this makes me a bitch, so be it. That said, if it was a person I actually had to deal with everyday for the next few years, then I would stay silent and use avoidance tactics, but in the situation I was in, there was nowhere else to go.



Talking behind people's backs/gossiping and telling your boyfriend they behave in a manner that makes you uncomfortable and you find rude is different. One leads to nothing but talking, the other has a solution as its end (not hanging out with them...etc).

And if you want to tell these people that you don't appreciate their behaviour, more power to you. To do it "in a way that they'll hear me say it" is just passive-agressive and immature, IMO.

Got an example for you: I went to a friend's house to hang out with her and a few of her friends. I had previously met everyone and while they didn't blow me away as marvelously fun human beings, the time was enjoyable. So I went to the gathering. The fun went out the door rather quickly. My friend's husband was incredibly rude to both me and her. The other woman's husband was the same. They were incredibly sexist: making derogatory comments all night long. I questioned a few things they said, challenged a few and just left the majority alone, with a serious gulp to hold back my indignation. When I saw my friend later that week, she kept apologizing for the men's rude behaviour. I said only a few things, mainly about how I was glad we, the girls, kicked their booties in the games we played. The next time she invited me to something with her husband...I declined, and politely explained why. She understands and doesn't ask me to come over when he (or they) are around...or makes sure the activity isn't something that includes them. I appreciate that. I SOOOOOOO wanted to tell them where to go, but what does that get me...or them...in the end? Nothing.

I'm not advocating changing who you are, just that you should realize that your behave was rude and inconsiderate as well.

***************
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:14 AM

CALIFORNIAKAYLEE


Quote:

crude jokes about Mario 64... stole a megaphone... looking me over and practically undressing me with their eyes...


That sounds exactly like my normal weekend, only less megaphone, more karaoke, and I'm married to one of those guys.

My normal is evidently a lot different than your normal, but I don't see any problem with that.

~CK

You can't take the sky from me...

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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:18 AM

ZEEK


Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
Dirt to work with, huh.

Well, there's the crude jokes that were completely out of place (who makes crude jokes about Mario 64?). One of the guys somehow stole a megaphone and they were going up and down the hallway of the dorms either yelling into it or pressing the button to make it make a feedback noise (high pitched and piercing). People were coming into the room to "meet" me, which for some consisted of looking me over and practically undressing me with their eyes with my boyfriend standing right there. There was more, but I'm sure you can get the picture.


I'm a leaf on the wind


I'm going to pretty much have to go with "that's college". Especially in the men's dorm. One of the memories me and my buddies always talk about is the time we were walking to the cafeteria and a car driving by used a loud speaker to proclaim "you are a whore" to a girl waiting to cross the road in a short skirt and fishnet stockings. It was great fun (not so much for her). We made crude comments about games, tv, lint and anything else we could find a way to make crude comments about. Oh and meeting a dude's gf is pretty much a meat market. It's all about who has the hottest girl in college.

Sorry, but I'm going to have to say you need to not stay in a guy's dorm if you want to avoid that kind of stuff.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:34 AM

RHYIANAN


Rugbug, I understand what you are saying, and yes, it is immature, but I had no way out of the situation. There was nowhere else for us to go that wouldn't have the same issues, and I couldn't simply remove myself from the situation. (what am I gonna do, say "sorry sweetheart" and drive the ten hours back home?) The only thing I can say in my own defense is that I was frustrated, and that is a rather weak excuse. It doesn't excuse it, but it does explain my own mindset. However, I can't say I regret it.

And the "in a way they'll hear me say it" is so that they don't hear it from someone else that misconstrues it and turns the situation into some huge mess that is worse than it would have been otherwise. If someone has a problem with the way I act or something I say, I'd rather hear it from their own mouth in some way or another because then I can either adjust my behavior or talk to that person and attempt to work it out in some way. I'm just applying that principle to the way I deal with others. If you find that to be wrong, ok.


I'm a leaf on the wind

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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:44 AM

RUGBUG


Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
If someone has a problem with the way I act or something I say, I'd rather hear it from their own mouth in some way or another because then I can either adjust my behavior or talk to that person and attempt to work it out in some way. I'm just applying that principle to the way I deal with others. If you find that to be wrong, ok.



Oh, I'm all good with saying things...but saying it from another room is the same as muttering under your breath. Just go outside and say it to their face. You think they're morons? Go tell 'em. To say it from the other room, well....you've already heard my opinion on that.

Lest you think I'm immune to passive agressive behaviour: I had a moment a week or so ago when someone impolitely cut in line in front of me. I know these people...and I don't think they did it on purpose, but it really pissed me off. Instead of saying "hey, I was waiting for that," I did some muttering so they could hear. It accomplished what I wanted, but it was lame on my part.

Oh, and men's dorms at college? EVILLLLL. EEEEEEEEVIL. No two ways around it.



***************
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it." - George Bernard Shaw

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Monday, February 26, 2007 10:50 AM

RHYIANAN


Thanks, Zeek, you seem to be the only one that truly answered my question, even if it wasn't the answer I wanted. I guess I must really go to an atypical school then, because last year I was in the co-ed dorm and there was absolutely none of that kind of thing, unlike bf's (which was also a co-ed dorm, in the section that actually had more girls rooms than guys).


I'm a leaf on the wind

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Monday, February 26, 2007 11:23 AM

MSG


My thought is this. If you don't like how those guys treated you and their behavior, I'd suggest taking your boyfriend aside and , not in an accusing way, tell him exactly which behaviors made you uncomfortable and why. If you enjoy his company, he must not act like these guys most of the time. Just tell him that kind of situation isn't something you enjoy and tell him next time he should have a guy time and you'll have a girl time. I must say though it does seem like typical college guy behavior and I'm not sure you can expect anyone to be mature all the time.
It seems to me what bugged you most is that your boyfriend was not defending you or preventing the guys from making you uncomfortable. It's pretty likely he doesn't know that what they did bugged you until you got upset. He probably also doesn't know why you got so mad. Most guys wouldn't have any objections to being on the receiving end of any of the treatment you talked about so it most likely didn't occur to him that it would upset you. Talk to him:) Good luck!

"I'm not all that interested in the mental health of people who want to kill me. "- Leroy Jethro Gibbs



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Monday, February 26, 2007 11:43 AM

MSG


Oh wow this is getting way to long

NEW THREAD!!!!! ( getting Jonny's attention

http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=27296

"I'm not all that interested in the mental health of people who want to kill me. "- Leroy Jethro Gibbs



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Monday, February 26, 2007 11:53 AM

JONNYQUEST

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?"


Quote:

Originally posted by Rhyianan:
Thanks, Zeek, you seem to be the only one that truly answered my question ?!?, even if it wasn't the answer I wanted. I guess I must really go to an atypical school then, because last year I was in the co-ed dorm and there was absolutely none of that kind of thing, unlike bf's (which was also a co-ed dorm, in the section that actually had more girls rooms than guys).


Now to do something I never do: quote Buffy.
"All men are beasts, Buffy." - Faith (Then see all the anti-manbashing senitments above. No wonder this relationship stuff gets so complicated! Who you gonna believe?)

As for guys in dorms. Subhuman species. I know I was one too. Not jest Zeek. Luckily we grew out of it. At least I did. At least I think I did.


"Well, here I am...Does that seem right to you?"

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Monday, February 26, 2007 1:24 PM

HELL'S KITTEN


Quote:

Originally posted by JonnyQuest:
As for guys in dorms. Subhuman species. I know I was one too. Not jest Zeek. Luckily we grew out of it. At least I did. At least I think I did.

You didn't.

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Monday, February 26, 2007 1:45 PM

ZZETTA13


Seems to be 2 different topics running at the same time in the last dozen posts or so 'animals" and "college" so I will inject both of them into one of my the all time,favorite funny movies "Animal House". Guys will be nasty perverted pigs that can live under your roof. Least that's what my wife tells me. She lives with 3

Pay no attention to thoes Russians and Romans, Russian hands and Roman fingers (and eyeballs)

Z

My wife is a goddess who can belch better that I can.


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