GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Male and Female Imponderables--Delicate Sound of Thunder

POSTED BY: TRISTAN
UPDATED: Wednesday, September 27, 2006 05:41
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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:15 AM

TRISTAN


New thread; same concept!

Last thread:
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=24183&m=384313#384313

Post and enjoy!

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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:25 AM

MAVOURNEEN


Oh, am I first?

Meant to ask this earlier - excuse the delicate phrasing...
Why can I do no wrong in my husband's eyes for a few days...uh...post any marital activity?
Despite frequency, content, anything...I can get away with murder!
EDIT: As in,
"Honey, I just spent $300 on dvds"
"No problem, sweetheart"

Ok, boys. What gives? Is it hormones?

"Have you ever been with a Warrior Woman?"

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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:25 AM

MSG


Firsties:)

OK NV here's the recipe thread I just posted a few nice potato recipes..including a simple potato cake thing for leftover mashed potatos:)
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=23626&m=375548#375548



I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:28 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


New thread. Shiny


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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:29 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Stupid double postyness (smashes response with hammer) BANG!

So we went and saw Wicker Man this weekend. Almost got plowed into by some bloody drunk pullin' out of a local squid bar. Chased 'em down with the full intent on makin' their evening a bad one. Dang law beat me to it. Circled back later to find out the driver was a VERY intoxicated girl. Think I still woulda punched her in the mouth. Or maybe a snappy muff punch. Decisions, decisions.


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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:33 AM

TRISTAN


Mavourneen, in answer to your query...yes. Generally that is the case. A bit of background to help explain...
Frequency for me the past six months to a year was sketchy at best. When it did happen, even if it was not all that great, to me it was affirmation that I was still "desired"...so, I would overlook certain things in the hopes that the frequency would increase, etc. Be warned, though, those feelings with me lasted at most a week and a half, then bitterness began creeping in to fill the remaining days or weeks until the next "session".


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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:44 AM

KAREL

Flying on duct tape and a damaged registry.


Delicate Sound of Thunder... is that followed by A Momentary Lapse of Reason? Maybe it is the other way around.

I go away now.
--Karel.

"Wonderous is our great blue ship that sails around the mighty sun and joy to everyone that rides along." -- Jeff Lynne, Electric Light Orchestra.

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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:44 AM

MAVOURNEEN


Since Husband & I reconciled over 1 year ago (we were separated for 6 months), things have been great. No complaints. I have noticed, however, that the time to break ANY bad news is definitely post-coital.


"Have you ever been with a Warrior Woman?"

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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:48 AM

MSG


See I find food is the best way to break news of anything...because when your mouth is full it's hard to yell, plus you feel very satisfied at that moment so it works for me:)

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:50 AM

MAXIMUSCHAPOLINIUS


Quote:

Originally posted by Mavourneen:
Since Husband & I reconciled over 1 year ago (we were separated for 6 months), things have been great. No complaints. I have noticed, however, that the time to break ANY bad news is definitely post-coital.


"Have you ever been with a Warrior Woman?"



taking notes....

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Monday, September 25, 2006 9:51 AM

TRISTAN


Karel! No need to run away!

Mavourneen, I agree...and this next part is said to be laughed at, not to seek pity. When the news of the divorce was broken to me, it had been fast approaching a month...so the news had that lack against it as well as a number of other issues.
I can picture it in my head...
Laying back in bed, enjoying the afterglow...
"Honey?"
*satisfied sigh* "Yes, dear?"
"I totalled the car this afternoon..."
*pause*
"That's ok, dear...we'll get another one"


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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:12 AM

KELKHIL


*For some reason pictures a nekkid Tristan*

Dirty, dirty, dirty!!

*bolts from the thread, back to the Pub to Wash the image from his mind*

Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:15 AM

TRISTAN



Thanks, KelKhil!
Think I may join you over there...it's approaching martini time...

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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:19 AM

KELKHIL


Got 2 more hours here unfortunatly. But I will be partaking in a few tonight for real as well I think. I was on call all last week and could not even enjoy a beer when the Lions were crushed by the Packers on Sunday.



Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:33 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


(Moshes through thread, Dropkick Murphys blaring from Farsaken Pub)


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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:41 AM

WHITEFALL


Argh..... stupid homework which I should be doing at this very moment.

A three day weekend (today be an in-service day), what fun! Oh wait... no.... all my teachers decided, "eh, three day weekend, because of that extra 24 hours i can give a weeks worth of homework".... Ok, i exagerate, but ever since this hellhole that is senior year started, free time has become a thing of the past. If i'm not doing my homework, I should be applying to colleges. Which i've not been doing.

How that relates to the male tendency to be overly mellow post-sex... i really dont know. But as I cant comment on that, I make just... um... diary. I dunno.

"But, these strong women characters?"

"Why aren't you asking 100 other guys why they don't write strong women characters?" -Joss Whedon.

"We take all the money we got saved right now, we could maybe buy a moderately sized gerbil." -Mal

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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:45 AM

TRISTAN


NVG, that sounds an awful lot like The Warrior's Code... Good choice!

Whitefall, I wish I could offer you a drink...

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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:49 AM

LITTLEALBATROSS29


Hey NV how're you doing sweetie ?

MSG- I have a Hawaiian fertility totem that I'm pointing in your direction.It worked for me,twice !

Hi Tristan- hope you got through yesterdays storm ok.

So I'm watching Buffy season 7 & just got up to Nathan's part.Man is he one creepy bad guy.


Bryce
***********************************






I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:57 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Howdy. All is fine I hope.

Brown folks need no totem. Most of them breed easily. Gotta be very careful 'round these parts.


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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:58 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Stupid internetty thingy. (Stabs with pencil)


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Monday, September 25, 2006 10:59 AM

TRISTAN


Howdy, LA29! Survived well, thank you...won't have to water the lawn for awhile, though.
How are you doing?

I loved our Captain in those episodes...but I kept expecting him to shoot someone...

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:03 AM

LITTLEALBATROSS29


ooh... double posty goodness.

Bryce
***********************

I swallowed abug.

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:08 AM

KELKHIL


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:

I loved our Captain in those episodes...but I kept expecting him to shoot someone...



Well he does do that thumb thing. (won't describe for LA29's sake. Sounds like she ain't seen it yet)

That season of Buffy was why I started watching FF when it came out. I loved the captain in that character. He did it so well it was scary.

Kelkhil

The Shirtless Forsaken

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:09 AM

LITTLEALBATROSS29


Glad to hear you got through it ok.It looked like rain here all day ,but it never happened.

I'm well,and all is pretty quiet here on the marriage front .I'm awaiting our first therapy appointment on Wed.

Although if my boys don't stop fighting ,I'm going to go insane. Looks like I'm going to need alot of Kelkhil's margarita's tonight.

I was surprised at how scary Caleb is.Can't wait to see how Buffy beats him.
Bryce
**********************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:15 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Glad to hear it. Kinda makes waves when kids are involved (especially when they're full of energy)


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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:15 AM

TRISTAN


LA29, invest in lots of velcro. Stich one part on to the children's clothing, staple the other part about four feet up the wall. When they give you problems, stick them to the wall for awhile.

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:18 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


And on the eighth day God made Nyquil. And it was good. (KIDDING)


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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:22 AM

TRISTAN


Never thought of NyQuil...that would definitely work, LA29!

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:22 AM

MSG


LA- good luck on the counseling!my friend has 4 boys ( an one 2 year old girl) and she turned her basement into a playroom complete with bathroom and her sub basement into a sports court so when all the boys and their friends are there and it's raining, she can flip on the intercom and send them down to the playroom/sports court for hours ( I keep telling her she should lock to door)or put a mini fridge and microwave down there and just let them live there.

NV- sure rub the easy breeding thing in my face( actually I think the easy breeding thing is a product of all those teenage hormones and not tied to a specific genetic group) LOL... hey if you've got good genes they should be shared around ( which could explain the ease of breeding thing as well) and I have to say you've got great genes in the personal traits zone, thoughtful , smart, charming, fun, responsible, caring, dedicated, and dead sexy....hey as I make this list I realize you really need to get out there and share those genes...

My friend told us that when they went on road trips her parents made them get up at 4 am then dosed them with benadryl when they got to the first rest stop around 10 am

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:25 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


NVG- Activly persuing the sharing of genes from his jeans. (Insert product name here)


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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:25 AM

MACAVITY


Hey, no robotripping in here please!

Ahem. Anyway . . . I've been pondering a question posed by Tom Baker:

"Why is a mouse when it spins?"

Why, indeed . . .

"First come smiles, then come lies. Last is gunfire." - Roland Deschain, gunslinger

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:46 AM

LITTLEALBATROSS29


MSg- I wish I had a basement to let them play in.I'm in a small apartment. Unfortunately there's no escape.ANd benadryl has the oppisite effect on my children -they get extra hyper from it.
I'll keep the totem facing west towards you.He's got great energy.

NV -any child would be lucky to have your genes.really.

Tristan -the velcro thing sounds great, but being energetic boys,they'd probably like it too much.

I just had the best pizza for dinner.I don't like big city life,but the food choices are outstanding.In 1 block from me I've got -Turkish,Russian,Chinese,pizza,and sushi.And everything else delivers.

Bryce
**************************************

I swallowed a bug.

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:53 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Yeah, but eventually they may fit in my jeans. That sucks



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Monday, September 25, 2006 12:10 PM

EMMARIGBY


Hey guys! Gosh you've been busy posters today. I'm all tired and covered in paint from decorating!

I'm kind of scared of this talk of breeding. Sounds like the none too subtle hints my mum drops. Luckily she's been diverted by the news that my sister's expecting twin boys. This is a good thing as although I love babies (from a distance) I seriously doubt that I have the patience to be a mum. I have too much of a temper to ever trust myself not to be screamy shouty mum, or worse.

___________________
Hissssssssss!

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Monday, September 25, 2006 2:19 PM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
LA29, invest in lots of velcro. Stich one part on to the children's clothing, staple the other part about four feet up the wall. When they give you problems, stick them to the wall for awhile.



... and you told us you weren't parent material!


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Monday, September 25, 2006 2:39 PM

STINKINGROSE


I have heard legend of the Benadryl Smoothie. Never been *quite* desperate enough to try it. Yet.

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Monday, September 25, 2006 4:29 PM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Howdy Mags. Jumpin' in from work (Here late for all things, a parenting group. Facilitator. Lucky me!)

Velcro-The worlds new babysitter.

'Night all.


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Monday, September 25, 2006 5:08 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Morning everyone! I am tired today but in fairly good spirits as it is my Friday.
Mav, haven't you heard the adage "Have sex with your husband every night and you'll get what you want without a fight"? Not saying it's true for every man on the face of the planet, but might be true for yours. Oddly enough, I think that rule would apply to me, too. (Oh no, now you all know my secret!) Why? Happiness and a relaxed attitude. Endorphins are good.
On the drugging kids thing: supposedly my great uncle by marriage was a doctor and would sedate his 11 children on road trips. I never met the man, so it's all hearsay, but I don't find it hard to believe. Eleven kids?! Yeah, scary thought. I don't know how my great aunt survived it.
Um, am I missing anything? Sorry to hear your homework troubles, Whitefall. Knew there was a reason I don't miss school.
I want a nap. Damn work...

http://www.bigdamnthankyou.com - show Universal your gratitude!

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. - Gautama Siddharta

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Monday, September 25, 2006 8:00 PM

CHRISMOORHEAD


Y'know strangely enough, I don't agree with drugging children, even though I really don't like them. Anything from alcohol to zoloft or ridelin, just doesn't sit well with me. There seems to be a lot of people sitting on either side of the fence, one side says "Too many pills!" and the other says "Shut up! The pills are working!".

I'd ask both sides to consider this:

Children, all the way from ancient times up until as recently as 50 years ago, were beaten regularly by parents and other disciplinary figures. It's only a product of modern times, really, that beating them has become taboo. To that effect, possibly, there seems to be a much greater sub-culture of rebellion in youth now-adays than at any recorded part of human history (at least the history I've read). Yet today we diagnose most abused children as having disorders of any and every type from emotional, to psychological, to chemical.

My... question, theory, whatever it is, is that if we've been beating our young since the beginning of our recorded history and, presumably, before, would it not be the "natural" state of humanity to have been beaten as a child? Might all these "disorders" be either a product of their own creation (you give someone an excuse, they use it), or perhaps just the natural state of humanity?

It's a far-off concept, I know, but I really believe that humans are meant to endure a great deal of suffering at some point in their lives. It's part of the human experience; to know the darker side of ourselves instead of ignoring. Most people accept that having your heart broken in a relationship for the first time is part of growing up, as are many other painful experiences. Yet it's my observation that even these are falling out of general acceptance of what a child should and shouldn't endure when they're younger.

So what is it? A 'pussification' of mankind? Or do you believe we're actually "advancing" ourselves by taking away all forms of suffering? Or maybe you're somewhere in between? Certainly, I think it's an issue of balance, but my idea of balance tends to be much different than most people's.

And, as a disclaimer, I was beaten as a child, so don't assume I'm totally uninformed on the subject. I'm putting this forth as a question, not a statement.

[IMG]
"Pain is your friend, it is your ally. It will keep you awake, and angry, and remind you to finish the mission and get the hell home. But you know the best thing about pain? It let's you know that you're not dead yet."

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Monday, September 25, 2006 11:59 PM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Chris - I think I need to re-read and ponder some more before I respond to that - but thank you for the thought you've put into it! As a nanny I see a lot of what you're saying in action, and in studies I read... I just need to organise my thoughts before I put them here in black and white. BTW, sorry to sound prudish, but I find the term 'pussification' somewhat insulting to all of the women here... thought you'd rather have it pointed out than ignored. We welocme your input - it's just not a terribly respectful way of contributing... hope you don't mind me saying!

Also - LOL!! when I read that you were spreading your genes from your jeans, NVG, I got the giggles coz I had a vision of you traipsing round the country with a very Elvis Presley style of pelvic action associated!

Be back soon - it's been a very tiring day!


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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 2:30 AM

TRISTAN


Morning, all!

Stinkgingrose, sorry to hear about the noo moan yah...I am glad you seem to be surviving it and are back, though!

Magda, I do have a few parenting tricks up my sleeve!

Benadryl smoothie...hmm...

Morning, NVG, MSG!

Morning, CMH! I think you may have something there. I am not a proponent of thrashing the hell out of a child if they do something a bit out of line, but I do think some sort of discipline is important. And you are right; it has gotten to the point where a parent cannot even tap the child on the bottom without having "outraged citizens" call DHR down on them. I am neither a parent, nor was I beaten as a child. I did have the ocassional spanking when necessary, and after a few of those a mere word or raised hand were enough.
That may require some further insight.

I need coffee. I'll be back.



______________________________________

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 2:35 AM

MAVOURNEEN


Good Morning Everyone!

I decided not to post over at the Pub, as I would be tempted to have another 7 & 7...not the day to do it! Just found out I had 3 containers landing yesterday, 2 in NY, 1 in Philadelphia. Tons of paperwork for me!
Have a great day- I'll try to be on later.
-M.

"Have you ever been with a Warrior Woman?"

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 3:41 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Hello dear Mav... what do you do when they land - have they landed on someone or something... ? Do you have to clean that up?

Sorry couldn't resist!!

How're you going Tristan? I'm almost at nightcap time - need a Baileys... so I might have to pop in to the pub anyway!

Good to see some folk here anyway!

Love you all Magda x x


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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 4:18 AM

MAVOURNEEN


Magda- Wish it HAD landed on a certain Customs Official who shall be nameless in Philadelphia...



He's just doin' his job. Breathe in. Breathe out.



"Have you ever been with a Warrior Woman?"

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 4:18 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


My mother raised me and she never raised a hand to me. My dad sometimes did, but not often, and he did not raise me for most of my life.
My mom would let me know when I was out of line. If I threw a fit in public, she scooped me up and we went home. That was all it took.
She also set right and wrong in my mind at a very young age, and would talk to me seriously when I was calm enough to listen after I had done something wrong. I'm not going to say this made me the perfect child, but I am going to hold it up as proof that there don't have to be blows - or even swats - to get a child's attention and let them know they're out of line. I knew I was out of line and would be properly ashamed. And if mom was disappointed in me? Oh, that was horrible.
Now here is the thing about the way my dad would sometimes handle things; if he spanked or punished me physically, I would come away from it feeling that he was in the wrong, rather than me. I knew it wasn't right to harm someone like that. Even if he was doing it for a 'good' reason, the point would be missed because I felt he was wrong rather than me being wrong.
I do not have any disorders that require any form of medication. Any issues I do have stem from emotional blows I recieved as a child.
No, I do not think it's a bad thing to discipline children in non-violent ways. I think violence seeds bitterness, not health. You're bigger than your child; you can restrain them or pick them up and leave with them if that's what you need to do. But a child should not be afraid of their parent.

http://www.bigdamnthankyou.com - show Universal your gratitude!

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. - Gautama Siddharta

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 4:23 AM

TRISTAN


Hey, Magda! You're ready for a nightcap while I need coffee! Stupid 15 hour time difference...

Mavourneen, sorry to hear about the container problem!

PR. Huh. Thanks for that. Interesting take on things.



______________________________________

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 4:47 AM

MSG


I will say my dad spanked me once in my whole life, and I will also say I deserved it. I threw a heavy crystal dish at my mom's head. ( Luckily I missed) and I got spanked for endangering someone. I don't think spankings over everyday discipline does anything other than teach kids to hit when they want to enforce something, but I will say that if they are doing something profoundly dangerous it can be a way to make a strong impact that the choice has serious consequences. Because he only did it once, it made a big impact on me and I never tried to injure my mom again ( I had a mostly sunny disposition, but a wicked nasty temper)

I'd say that firm rules and sticking to them is seriously lacking in our culture. I would agree with a part of what Chris said. I don't think it's the lack of spanking, but the total lack of follow through. Parents are overworked and tired and they just give in. It used to be when a parent grounded you or took away priviledges that was that. Parents backed up what they said. They meant it and they would enforce the consequences severely. Now it seems ( from a teachers perspective) that the main discipline strategy for a large portion of parents is to ignore any and all behavior until it is so bad no one can stand it, then yell or scream at the child. No attempt is made to show kids how to get what they need or what behaviors are acceptable..just scream and ignore. I have seen good parents, but I see a lot more who just can't be bothered.
Case in point. My sister in law has a sistern named Jen. She has 3 kids. Thursday was my nephew's first birthday and Jen brought 2 of her kids. Her youngest (4 years old) ran around and grabbed toys and bashed them into walls and the dog repeatedly. His mother ignored this. My brother stopped him several times and finally told him if he didn't stop that the toys would be taken away. Through this whole thing his mom was sitting 4 feet away and didn't even acknowledge the behavior. Then it was time for Wyatt to get his birthday cake. They put Wy in the high chair and placed his cake in front of him. Jen's boy ran over and started grabbing at the cake and eating it before Wy could even touch his own cake. My brother and his uncle told him to stop several times and finally pulled him away and made him sit down. His own mother was there the entire time and made no move to stop him until she realized everyone was really angry that he was ruining Wy's party. Then she dragged him one room away and began yelling that she couldn't take him anywhere and he was such a problem...WTF??? she refuses to parent and he doesn't have a clue what appropriate behavior is and that's HIS fault???

Sorry rant over, it just really bugged me.

I choose to rise instead of fall- U2



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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 4:51 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Well said, Ms G.

http://www.bigdamnthankyou.com - show Universal your gratitude!

Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without. - Gautama Siddharta

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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 4:52 AM

MAGDALENA

"No power in the 'verse can stop me!"


Tis just wrong that Tristan... simply wrong...

Gorgeous PR - my parents were the same though I did grow up with my father & his terrible temper - I love him dearly and am close to him - but I sometimes wonder if he did permanent damage to me, coz he used to hit me over the head occassionally and now I suffer from chronic headaches... still he was parenting as he'd been parented so... I actually am very like my Dad and I learned to control my temper at an early age coz I felt, like you, that he was the one in the wrong - not me! Another side of life we share a bond over...

Sorry that it didn't land on him then Mav! Better luck next time - eh?

And with that my dear imponderers... I am off to bed - coz I really need my beauty sleep!... and another glass of Baileys too...

Enjoy your day my FFFfamily! - Magda x x


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Tuesday, September 26, 2006 4:55 AM

TRISTAN


MSG, amen to that! Kids seem to run the house nowadays...

Magda, sleep well, and we will see you tomorrow!

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