GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Male and Female Imponderables-Resurrected

POSTED BY: TRISTAN
UPDATED: Thursday, June 8, 2006 10:33
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 14404
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Friday, June 2, 2006 7:50 AM

TRISTAN


Thought it was time to bring this thread back...the last one kinda went "poof"!

To those who don't know, this thread is for posting questions or observations you may have regarding the opposite sex. Foibles, quirks, and things that generally confuse you. Post away, and the rest of us will do our best to answer. This can also be used as a polling station for generalities.

Please keep the posts clean...I do not necessarily mean the topices, just the language. Also, please try not to post something that will deliberately enrage the opposite sex. I would prefer that this remain a nice, intellectual (somewhat) place for the Browncoats to work on figuring out the opposite sex.

Post and enjoy!






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Friday, June 2, 2006 8:22 AM

SAMEERTIA


What does "Okay" mean when a guy says it????

Sample conversation;
"How are you?"
Okay
"Do you want spagetti or pizza for dinner?"
Okay
"I'm feeling like our relationship is going really well. How do you feel about it?"
Okay

WHAT DOES THAT MEAN??????????????

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Friday, June 2, 2006 8:31 AM

TRISTAN


Well, it depends on the tone. As tone is difficult to get across in typing, I'll see what I can do...

Okay said in a normal, everyday voice means just that; "Alright, that sounds fine with me".

Okay said hesitantly means "Well, if you insist, but I am not entirely happy about this".

Okay said long and drawn out means "Hmm. There seems to be a problem. Care to explain?"

Although, there are some males that use this to denote just what it means. Okay is an acceptable response to us. You ask us how we are...if all is well, the answer will be "okay". The either-or scenario you put there is an example of the male not paying attention however...that one deserves a bash. Pay Attention!

That is generality in action. Personally, I do not use okay unless I really mean it...some use it to make noise to let you know they are paying attention.

Hope that helps a bit...I can elaborate if need be.


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Friday, June 2, 2006 8:31 AM

DEEPGIRL187


My guess is that its a non-committal noise they make when they are off in their own little worlds. Something I do myself from time to time.

**************************************************

"I'm going to sing the doom song! Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, dooooooom...."


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Friday, June 2, 2006 8:34 AM

COPILOT


I'm not a guy but as far as I can tell it actually means okay. There isn't more to it. There is absolutley nothing written between the lines. Okay means ok! How many times can you write okay ok before it loses all meaning and you start to think you might be spelling it wrong?


Also I finally did it! I am now offically Single!
Confusion I'm sorry I don't have enough energy to go find shiny new emoticons.

An I carried such a torch.......For the Dark Lord

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:03 AM

TRISTAN


Copilot, congratulations!
Or...sorry!
Whichever the case may be. We are here for you!






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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:15 AM

COPILOT


I thought I'd be happier. But I don't know I guess I really do love him but it's over and done and I don't feel happy just relieved. Exhausted too and little like I'm going to vomit again.


An I carried such a torch.......For the Dark Lord

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:24 AM

DEEPGIRL187


Quote:

Originally posted by copilot:
I'm sorry I don't have enough energy to go find shiny new emoticons.



Don't worry, I found some for you.




Hope you feel better!

"I'm going to sing the doom song! Doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, doom, dooooooom...."


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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:27 AM

COPILOT


I'm trying really hard to feel all better. Remebering all the horrible things he said or did. But I don't know seeing someone nearly cry even I feel like a heartless bitch.
Arrrrgggggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm confused!

An I carried such a torch.......For the Dark Lord

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:39 AM

TRISTAN





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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:42 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


Hurrah to Tristan to bringing our favorite subject back into the light. And congrats Copilot for pulling it of in the end.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:42 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


Hurrah to Tristan to bringing our favorite subject back into the light. And congrats Copilot for pulling it of in the end.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:42 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


Hurrah to Tristan to bringing our favorite subject back into the light. And congrats Copilot for pulling it of in the end.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:42 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


Hurrah to Tristan to bringing our favorite subject back into the light. And congrats Copilot for pulling it of in the end.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:42 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


Hurrah to Tristan to bringing our favorite subject back into the light. And congrats Copilot for pulling it of in the end.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:42 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


Hurrah to Tristan to bringing our favorite subject back into the light. And congrats Copilot for pulling it of in the end.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:49 AM

COPILOT


Thank you darling Tristan I needed that!
All of you guys are just so nice and loving and supportive! I don't deserve you wonderful Browncoats!

An I carried such a torch.......For the Dark Lord

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Friday, June 2, 2006 10:09 AM

SAMEERTIA


*hugs* to Copilot!

It's never easy breaking up with someone, no matter how rough the relationship actually was.

Just keep breathing in and out. I promise it gets better!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 10:44 AM

TRISTAN


Copilot, we are here for you...for mutual support or for mutual bashing...either one you prefer.
Browncoats understand each other...you need to find one of them!




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Friday, June 2, 2006 10:57 AM

EMMARIGBY


Poor Co-Pilot, I send a hug your way!

I've broken up with someone I still cared about (but not enough) before and it was horrible! He ended up comforting me!

Tell us when you're ready for us to start setting you up on dates!

Hmm, virtual dates. This intrigues me. Has anyone here ever tried internet romance? (or even just internet heavy flirting?)

________________________________
Hisssssss!

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Friday, June 2, 2006 11:31 AM

COPILOT


Yes the match making offers have been pouring in. It's crazy aparently no one could ever understand why the two of us were in a relationship in the first place. I'm starting to feel better. This amazing weight has been lifted and the sun is smiling on me.
I think the happy shall be here soon!
4 years!?! I've been in the same relationship for 4 years?!? I'm only 21!!!!!! Okay so now that I've screamed that at the top of my lungs (well really loud in my own head) I feel kinda good.

An I carried such a torch.......For the Dark Lord

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Friday, June 2, 2006 11:47 AM

TRISTAN


Emma, yes, actually, I have. Not the hokey "dinner by computer-light" dating, but the flirting and getting-to-know someone type thing. Oddly enough, both wives...hmmm. Clarification is needed...
I knew both wives before I talked to them on the 'net. My first wife was a whirl-wind setup romance as she was leaving to go home (France) less than a month after we met. We spent several months talking online, getting to know each other and generally having a good time. She ended up moving back to the US to continue her education. Long story short; married in 2000, 6 months of bliss, year and a half of hell, divorce in 2002.

Not having learned my lesson () I began talking to my current wife online alot. Most of you know the story behind her...I'll be brief for those just joining us:
She is ten years my junior. I met her while in college pursuing a fourth degree (didn't finish it). I hired her as a Ren Faire fighter, and instantly fell in love with her. All of this happened while I was still married to the first wife. NOTHING ever happened between us...we had a brother-sister relationship. After my divorce and her break-up, we began talking more. However, we both spent a lot of time on the computer, and learned more about each other than we would have otherwise. Another long story short (too late, I know)...we discovered we shared a love, we dated, we married in Oct 2004, and bliss has been ours ever since.

So, back to the question. Yes, I have "dated" online. I think it is easier to communicate with someone when you have time to think about what you are saying and given time to type it out. I am much more eloquent with a keyboard than with my mouth. Not saying I am anti-social; I like being around people. But for important thoughts, writing is sometimes a better choice.

Damn, sorry about that...it's Friday, I am on a caffeine high, anticipating the weekend, and my fingers just went into overdrive...hope that was not TMI...






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Friday, June 2, 2006 12:17 PM

SWEETSERENDIPITY


Way to go Copilot! We're here for you if you need anything!

Deb


http://serendipityagain.com/

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Friday, June 2, 2006 12:41 PM

COPILOT


Everything is bright and shiny now!!! Still feel as if I will vomit at any moment so watch your step. But I feel good.....giddy even. I don't know where I'm going to live but oh well it'll work out I have lots of super nice friends.
ooops!

An I carried such a torch.......For the Dark Lord

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Friday, June 2, 2006 1:40 PM

LEAINA


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
Emma, yes, actually, I have. Not the hokey "dinner by computer-light" dating, but the flirting and getting-to-know someone type thing. Oddly enough, both wives...hmmm. Clarification is needed...
I knew both wives before I talked to them on the 'net. My first wife was a whirl-wind setup romance as she was leaving to go home (France) less than a month after we met. We spent several months talking online, getting to know each other and generally having a good time. She ended up moving back to the US to continue her education. Long story short; married in 2000, 6 months of bliss, year and a half of hell, divorce in 2002.

Not having learned my lesson () I began talking to my current wife online alot. Most of you know the story behind her...I'll be brief for those just joining us:
She is ten years my junior. I met her while in college pursuing a fourth degree (didn't finish it). I hired her as a Ren Faire fighter, and instantly fell in love with her. All of this happened while I was still married to the first wife. NOTHING ever happened between us...we had a brother-sister relationship. After my divorce and her break-up, we began talking more. However, we both spent a lot of time on the computer, and learned more about each other than we would have otherwise. Another long story short (too late, I know)...we discovered we shared a love, we dated, we married in Oct 2004, and bliss has been ours ever since.

So, back to the question. Yes, I have "dated" online. I think it is easier to communicate with someone when you have time to think about what you are saying and given time to type it out. I am much more eloquent with a keyboard than with my mouth. Not saying I am anti-social; I like being around people. But for important thoughts, writing is sometimes a better choice.

Damn, sorry about that...it's Friday, I am on a caffeine high, anticipating the weekend, and my fingers just went into overdrive...hope that was not TMI...



Hey Tristan, it's really good to hear that internet relationships can work out. I was in one for a while (with a guy in NZ so we never managed to meet) and when it ended I told myself that the reason was exactly because it was really limited to the net. We begna to call each other on the phone and the spoken conversations were never quite as good as the typed ones. Maybe it would have been different in person.

I think you really manage to share a part of yourself through just writing that you don't when you throw in body language and all the other facets of face-to-face relationship. What I think is impressive, Tristan, is that you managed to take the honesty of an internet relationship and translate it into real terms. Was that hard to do, when you first met in person?

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Friday, June 2, 2006 1:44 PM

TRISTAN


Well, Leaina, I had met both of them face-to-face prior to online, but yes, the first time or two actually seeing the person after spilling out inner thoughts in print was a bit difficult. I am naturally shy and reserved in person, but a bit more open online. It turns out that all went well (as you read). I really would not know how it would have turned out had I not known them first...



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Friday, June 2, 2006 2:18 PM

AERIN


Keep these threads going!
I was busy at work and fell behind after Part I. Now I'm trying to catch up, but I'm not quite done with part III.

Best fanbase ever.

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Friday, June 2, 2006 5:24 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Copilot

I know you're not going to be really happy for awhile; I myself am still manic from my last relationship. Happy! No, sad! No, just relieved! No, really pissed off! No...!
Blech. But I am glad for you because it didn't sound to me like a pile of goodness, which is what I really hope you find. We all deserve a big pile of goodness in our lives.

Internet dating... Yeah, I tried that. I mostly got proposals from men in third-world countries. Met with a few actual people; was never attracted to any of them in person, sadly. I'm not going to rule it out, but I'd prefer it if I just met a shiny, available Browncoat at the Serenity screening here


**********************************

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Friday, June 2, 2006 8:47 PM

SASSALICIOUS


Lots of hugs for copilot. Feel free to rant and rave like a crazy woman when the need strikes.

Haven't had internet relationships ever. I once had cyber sex propositioned to me by some creepy guy, but I was 14 (he didn't mind breaking the law if I didn't) and then told him he was a sick !

QUESTION: So I was in a store today looking for something very specific (and they didn't have it). Anyway, my friend and I ran into this guy that we went to school with for 10 years. We made smalltalk and whatnot, then we left. In the years since high school ended he's done some interesting things and I'd like to talk to him more about it (and yes, he's kinda cute). The problem is we didn't talk in high school at all (we were friends when we were younger) and I can't find him on myspace. Would it be creepy if I showed up at work to see if he was there or called his work? I kind of think it is, but I can't tell. And what do I say to him? How do I make this NOT awkward or weird? I'm so confused! And I think he's gonna be in Cali when I'm there. GRrrrrr.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"
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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:01 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Well, where does he work? Is it a place you would go? If it's a place you can have an excuse for going, I say you should swing by. Don't call, just swing by. If he's not there, keep trying. If he is, just say "Hey, we should catch up. Your story about blank was pretty interesting. Give me a call." and then go on with whatever. But if you want to seem casual, definitely don't call. And... maybe don't show up too often. Three days in a row and people start to think you're a little odd.
*Ahem* Not that I would know...



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Friday, June 2, 2006 9:15 PM

SASSALICIOUS


He works at a sports store and I'm only in town until Tuesday . . .maybe I could drag my brother there for something.

I really just want one of my friends to do it for me (particularly the one that was with me). It's a total cop-out, but so much easier.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"
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Saturday, June 3, 2006 7:41 AM

COPILOT



I think dragging your brother along for a trip to the sports store would work just fine. He's you brother make him browse for hours if you must.

An I carried such a torch.......For the Dark Lord

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Saturday, June 3, 2006 9:23 AM

NUCLEARDAY


Quote:

Originally posted by Sassalicious:
Would it be creepy if I showed up at work to see if he was there or called his work? I kind of think it is, but I can't tell. And what do I say to him? How do I make this NOT awkward or weird? I'm so confused! And I think he's gonna be in Cali when I'm there. GRrrrrr.

I'd say go for it. The dragging the brother along for a good excuse to be there sounds like a good idea, too. (That's what siblings are for, isn't it? :) Personally, I've had that happen to me every once in a while: running into old acquaintances at random times and catching up with them, etc. Hasn't ever turned into anything much, but I don't think I've ever thought of it as wierd... Anyways, good luck :)

@Internet Dating: Never tried it, really. Come to think of it, I've never really dated anyone I wasn't friends with beforehand. But I've known people in fairly successful relationships where that was how they met, so I suppose you never know.

Anyone ever done the whole "cybersex" thing? I only ever did once back in the day when I was into the whole internet role-playing scene. (MUD/ MUSH/ MUX, etc.) Didn't really do much for me, I suppose. But it seems to be quite a "thing" here on the 'net. Read an article the other day about an online game called "Second Life" and it's burgeoning online prostitution... :P

________________________________________________
You can take my Browncoat when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers. (Or if Kaylee asks me nicely...)

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Sunday, June 4, 2006 5:25 AM

TRISTAN


BUMP
(so it's easier for me to find tomorrow!)


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Sunday, June 4, 2006 3:38 PM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Ha! I had cybersex once. It was really mostly a joke for me, though; I was laughing hysterically almost the whole time. Other than that it really didn't do much for me. Ain't nothing like the real thing, baby!

Okay, I got a question for the guys. If you were to find out a lady you liked/were dating liked ladies, what would your response be? I've gotten a few different ones, just like to know what's, uh, most likely.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 2:58 AM

TRISTAN


Morning, all.
Cybersex...nope, prefer the real thing.

PR, depends on the level of "like". I have dated women that are curious, but have never been with a woman, and I have dated one or two that have been with another woman. It does not bother me at all...but it would if I became a second fiddle. I would rather not be the male version of a beard for a woman, ya know? Other than that, I have no problems. I would not even ask to join in...but I might want to be there
Seriously, I am open-minded when it comes to things like that. As a male, I would rather my partner be with another female than with another male.


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Monday, June 5, 2006 4:12 AM

ZAMIAM


I wanna play!

I've never had cybersex, but I have had phone sex a few times during a somewhat long distance point of my current relationship. I didn't find it cheezy, or dirty, and it really helped us shy folk be more open around eachother. Basically, for me, it was surprisingly non-weird.

I've never really internet dated, but I agree that it's a lot easier to sort out words and thoughts typing than speaking.

But once again, my current relationship really got it's start on the phone. I met him during a weekend I was at home from college, and over the next two months we talked on the phone nearly every night, sometimes for hours. The experience was completely new for me, but I would have never gotten to know him any other way because of our mutual shyness. But then on the occasional weekend I made it back home, we were incredibly awkward around eachother. We got over it.


What do you folks think of dating people very close to your own personality type?

In my (few) previous relationships, I ended up with the outgoing, confident type because of my unwillingness to approach people. Introverted me plus extraverted them, we fit like puzzle pieces in a lot of respects. This time around I met a guy who is more similar to me. He's shy, he'd prefer to take the submissive role in a relationship, and he is painfully neurotic and worries constantly that he has said or done the wrong thing. In those ways we are carbon copies, and while it is nice to have someone who understands those things about me, we seem to spend an awful lot of time sorting things out so that no one has hurt feelings or the wrong idea about anything, and sometimes I feel a little lost without a dominant partner.

Similar experiences anyone?

--------------------------------------------------
I am a leaf on the wind.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 5:03 AM

SHEPHERD2BE


Another day at work is just more time to post with a free net connection.

Cybersex, only as a joke or if I had to take a job in antarctica.

Internet dating? Not a fan. It's the island of misfit toys out there and no one want's a charlie in the box. Had a few ok dinners, a few scary candidates. Who do I end up going out with? My ex-neighbors ex, who saw me on line.


PRose-
I have no problem dating a woman who is interested in women. It just means we have more in common.

It would be something I would like to know rather early in the relationship ( 3rd or 4th outing ) and be told privately. I have been a witness to when the girlfriend asks in front of his friends, "You know I've dated more women than men, right?" Kind of cut his legs out from under him.

I would also have to reserve the right to ask stupid male questions about her previous relationships. She would, of course, have the right to not answer them.


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Thought the collar gave it away"

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Monday, June 5, 2006 5:07 AM

TRISTAN


Dating your own personality type...that's kind of a scary concept!
I used to date women with whom I shared at least some likes and dislikes. My wife is an outgoing person who likes to socialize. I, on the other hand, would rather stay home and work on projects, or maybe hang out with a few close friends. Beyond that, she and I share alot of the same outlooks on life, with just enough differences to maintain the "whoah!" factor. I would hate to have to date someone just like me...would be very trying and would get boring after awhile.




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Monday, June 5, 2006 5:16 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


I tend to like people who are at least similar to my personality type for some reason. Not exactly the same, but if someone is, say, a worrier then they understand when I worry. I can basically be dominant or submissive, and I in fact kinda like trading off, so finding that in someone else is nice. It's also difficult. I also like dating people who are at least bi-curious, because all the men who weren't assumed that my attraction to women meant that I would leave them for a woman. They really didn't get it. (Oh and yes, I always told them before we even started dating. Didn't make them uncomfortable until about a month into the relationship.) I also have to say I really prefer dating people with similar outlooks, particularly on polotics and theology. Those two things have caused more headaches for me than anything. I know that's not really a "personality" thing, but in a way it is! In sum; exactly alike would probably be bad, similarities are good.

**********************************

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Monday, June 5, 2006 5:22 AM

MERCURY002


ah ive missed 3 days of talk oh well

Simon:"If the battle was so horrible, why did he name the ship after it?"
Zoe:"Once you've been in serenity you never leave"

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Monday, June 5, 2006 5:47 AM

MAL4PREZ


woo-hoo! Lots of goodies to catch up on.

Cybersex - Not for me. I kind of like having a warm body (um, I mean besides mine.)

Meeting over the net - I just tried carrying on some conversation with a guy a friend had hooked me up with (I've never met him in person) It fizzled out. I have a hard time because I really need to be with a person to see how they react, how they say things. Or else I don't feel I've gotten to know them.

Liking a woman who likes women? Only way it would work for me, if I tended that way. OK, then how about liking a man who likes another man? Huh. I don't think I'd be so thrilled. I'd want him to be saving it for me, you know?

Dating someone like me? There are definite similarities required, and some absolutely not. My last BF was on the introverted and anti-social side, and we really brought that out in eachother.

Zamiam - that sounds a lot like your situation. It really didn't work for me! I feel like the things to have in common are the good traits, not the negative ones. Unless you're both aware of it and trying to not drag each other down.


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I'm the president. I don't need to listen.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 5:48 AM

NUCLEARDAY


I can go either way as far as personality types are concerned. Never been terribly succesful either way, so... :P Once dated a fiery red-head that was the complete opposite of me: she was impulsive, out-going, energetic. I just wanted to sit around at home and watch TV :)

Didn't work out in the long run, though. That was too much difference, it seemed. I was holding her back in alot of ways and she kept trying to push me out of my comfort zone. Was quite alot of fun while it lasted, though.

Now that I've got some more experience under my belt, I prefer someone that complements my personality a bit more. My current g/f is alot more outgoing and adventurous than me, but not so much that we're constantly at odds. Just enough to get me to actually go outside every once in awhile. (Plus she's a total geek, so we have that in common at least :)

@Dating women with bi-tendencies. Personally, I think that's kind of hot. I'll go with Tristan on this one, I think. So long as we're not getting into cheating territory it's all good. (And who knows, I might be up to a good old-fashioned three-some, I suppose :)

________________________________________________
You can take my Browncoat when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers. (Or if Kaylee asks me nicely...)

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Monday, June 5, 2006 6:07 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Huh...
Maybe part of my last bf's problem was that he got tired of me veto-ing a threesome?
FYI to anyone who isn't bi:
IT DOESN'T MEAN WE WANT A THREESOME.
IT DOESN'T MEAN WE ARE BORED.
IT DOESN'T MEAN WE ARE FICKLE.
IT DOESN'T MEAN WE WILL CHEAT.
AND IT DOESN'T MEAN WE AREN'T SATISFIED.



Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Ya'll are shiny. I just... get really defensive about it sometimes.
So all it means to me is that I might look at women. If I'm with someone I'm faithful; rarely even get crushes when I'm in a commited relationship. But I do appreciate beautiful people of either sex. That is all. There isn't a threat, and there isn't much possibility of a threesome or a relationship on the side. I'm not saying it's impossible, it just hasn't appealed to me in reality. Ever.
Sorry. I'm done ranting now.

You know, it's actually funny; I developed a huge crush on Summer about a week after I was dumped. Until then she hadn't had that effect on me.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 6:17 AM

TRISTAN


I understand, PR. No, I am not bi-, nor have I ever had leanings that way, but I do understand. My statement was a joke. I am not getting defensive, just trying to point out that those of us who are exclusively hetero- do get you. I do not want to join in, I do not want to watch, nor do I want the details. All I would want is the truth of the matter; if it ends up she likes being with the woman more than with me, then I will bail. I am all for exploring human interactions, and would not step in anyone's way of doing so. However, from a hetero- standpoint, I would rather my partner no experiment with a member of the opposite sex. I would view that as cheating, and the relationship would end. With a member of the same sex...I have no problem, as long as that relationship does not come before ours.
I hope that clarifies the hetero- view.

By the way, am I the only hetero- posting in here?

May not be, but there are times when it seems that way...





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Monday, June 5, 2006 6:18 AM

SIMONWHO


I don't understand how bisexuals can be accused of being fickle. Surely monosexuals are the fickle ones?


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Monday, June 5, 2006 6:26 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Howdy TRISTAN and all you SHINY wonderful BROWNCOATS! Lunch went great. I'm hoping to procure future meetings sometime in the near future. Didn't that just sound dopey. Anyways its funny that you ask the similar personality question. I did not realize how difficult it is to share so many views with another human being, let alone a female that I happen to be insanely attracted to. I am honestly afraid of doing too little or too much at this point. Guess its time to man up and make my intentions clear. I'm hoping we have that boundry established in order to move forward at a nice slow and steady pace, (if at all). Thanks for allowing the tangent. And yes, being just different enough actually the tie that binds.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 6:28 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


I know, Tristan, I know. But people as shiny as you are relatively rare. I could go into long, angry stories about near-strangers and even fairly good friends telling me what I wanted/needed based soley on my orientation. As you can tell, it pissed me off.
If I'm with someone, it's because I want to be with them. Their parts don't matter. I don't prefer one sex over the other, just certain people over others.
And, for whatever record there might be, I haven't ever had a serious relationship with another woman. A few dates, but nothing heavy. Most women I fall for aren't interested, unfortunately. I hope this will be rectified one day, but I'm not going to say "My next relationship will be with a woman" either. Because y'know, I just never know. I'd like it to be, but I woudn't mind being with a man, either. I just want a good person.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 6:33 AM

TRISTAN


Ghostrider! Glad to hear it went well. I was thinking of you, hoping for good things. All things shall go well...keep us updated!


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Monday, June 5, 2006 6:38 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by SimonWho:
I don't understand how bisexuals can be accused of being fickle. Surely monosexuals are the fickle ones?



From what I know of it... No. It's a rather hotly debated topic among me and mine, though.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 7:02 AM

TRISTAN


I wouldn't imagine mono-sexuals could be tagged as "fickle"...we like one thing and one thing only...as far as sex goes.

Here's another question for the group regarding the whole sex issue: can you have sex with someone you don't love? I know it's physically possible, but is it something you have done or could do?


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Monday, June 5, 2006 7:05 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Can't do it. I'd ramble on about why, but most here have heard it in earlier threads.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 7:12 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Made that mistake some time ago. All the loveless sex made me feel so cold and empty that I really did not like myself. Having other issues at the time really didn't help much either. I really think that time was more about self abuse and running from the issues at hand. Here I sit a few years down the road realizing that I want to be in love with a real family life. Thank god I never caught anything or had any kids. I love kids, but there is no way I could have been a good dad back then. I love the idea of being in love. I have little memory of loving sex, just the memory of being close to a woman who loved me.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 7:57 AM

MAL4PREZ


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
Here's another question for the group regarding the whole sex issue: can you have sex with someone you don't love? I know it's physically possible, but is it something you have done or could do?



Maybe it says something sad about me, but I would have phrased it: has anyone ONLY had sex with people they love?

I've never had sex with someone I didn't like, or with someone I didn't know. But plenty of times with someone I was fond of but didn't absolutely love.

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I'm the president. I don't need to listen.

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Monday, June 5, 2006 8:03 AM

TRISTAN


Hmm. See, I may be different, then. I have bedded (and been bedded) by women I really did not care for. This, of course, only happened during the "early" years, which were a long time ago, but I had experienced this and was wondering if sex could be separated from love for any one here. Sex with love is wonderful, but the sex without love is still quite good. I do not think I could get away with it now...I have to have some positive feelings towards the person.


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