GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

Male and Female Imponderables Part IV

POSTED BY: TRISTAN
UPDATED: Monday, May 22, 2006 03:18
SHORT URL:
VIEWED: 18178
PAGE 2 of 4

Thursday, May 18, 2006 5:21 AM

COPILOT


Wa Hoo!!!!!!!!!

An I carried such a torch

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 5:32 AM

WORSHIPMAL


Yes, it worked out pretty well
Now I just have to see if I can get a repeat performance in again soon!
I also want to get in on some of these other topics - so much fun!

I am not a huge fan of jewelry on men as a rule, but I definitely agree with Mal4Prez that it depends on the guy. If you can pull it off, it can be sexy. But I tend to prefer that my men err on the side of too little bling rather than too much.

Talking during sex is one of the toughest things to get used to. It can be so awkward, but it can also be so HOT. CoPilot - I too have had times in my life when it seemed like if he wasn't gonna talk dirty to me then I just wasn't going to get there. But ultimately, there are lots of other things that work! I guess I can take it or leave it. And like PhoenixRose, I'm pretty vocal too in a non-coherent way. Sometimes I talk a little bit, but I'm never quiet! I do a lot of screaming into the pillow to keep the neighbors from calling the cops.

Finally - cuddling! I adore it and this was a big problem with me and my ex, who had a very typical "I'm a guy and afterwards I just want to have some space" attitude. He was warm and affectionate, don't get me wrong, but not much of a cuddler. Now, my current boyfriend, I am convinced, could win an Olympic gold medal for cuddling. We literally sleep all night every night totally entwined. Often we wake up in the exact same position we fell asleep in. And we have it down pretty well so that we are both really comfortable. This reminds me of the brief discussion on spooning that made an appearance in Imponderables part deux... it works great when he puts his arm out just under my neck, so that it is just a very slight cushion for me and my head isn't weighing down on him. Then nobody's arm falls asleep, and we can lay like that for hours!

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 5:37 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Awwwwwwwww....
Yay for you! I am jealous of the cuddling. I am sad I have no one to cuddle. I agree with the arm under neck thing, btw.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 5:45 AM

WORSHIPMAL


Don't be sad PhoenixRose! You are young yet. You'll find a champion cuddler of your own I am very sure!

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 5:51 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


I hope so!
'Tis not easy for me, the finding of people I actually wish to cuddle. The talking and falling for people. The wondering if they actually like me or not. (this is due to many past experiences.) Then with the finally being able to cuddle...
*sigh*
No, 'tis not easy.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 5:55 AM

TRISTAN


WorshipMal, Shiny! Glad it worked! And the line you used would have worked on any man! Dessert first...yeah, ok!


Holding until you get back, Captain.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:11 AM

WORSHIPMAL


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
The finding of people I actually wish to cuddle. The talking and falling for people. The wondering if they actually like me or not. (this is due to many past experiences.) Then with the finally being able to cuddle...



I sooo hear you. It's never easy... although it can sometimes seem like it is for everyone else. But trust me - for someone as self-aware and comfortable in her own skin as you seem to be, it can only get easier!

And Tristan - thanks again for the great tip

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:18 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Thanks!
It's good to hear that because sometimes I feel like my self-aware kinda gets in my way. Maybe it's better to say it limits my options somewhat. I wouldn't give it up, but sometimes I wonder if I'll just stumble across someone who will actually fnd it attractive.
For the record, a lot of men have seemed to find it attractive initially, and said it was a good thing, and then gotten a little unnerved by it. I think I have witnessed actual devolution of spirit in these instances. Sad and tragic

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:18 AM

TRISTAN


It wasn't just me, WorshipMal, all the browncoats come together to help!

No, it's not easy to find the right person. I can't speak, as I have found mine (or did she find me...?), but keep at it. Look at every failed match as experience; you will always learn something good even from something bad...like what to look for in the next partner. Or, if all else fails, come talk to us...we are here to help! Browncoat Lovin' Helpline...what to do when your mate is an idiot! Can a Browncoat find happiness out in the black?



Holding until you get back, Captain.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:21 AM

DEEPGIRL187


Wow, the fourth incarnation. The imponderables just keep coming don't they?

I don't know if this had been brought up already, but here goes:

Since much of this thread doesn't actually apply to me (I've never had a boyfriend or had sex) I thought I'd bring up a topic that does. I've always had trouble talking to people (though when I was a child it was easier to speak with boys). So I was wondering how many of you guys find it easy to speak with the opposite sex, or people in general.

**************************************************

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you."

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:27 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by PhoenixRose:
I hope so!
'Tis not easy for me, the finding of people I actually wish to cuddle. The talking and falling for people. The wondering if they actually like me or not. (this is due to many past experiences.) Then with the finally being able to cuddle...
*sigh*
No, 'tis not easy.

*************************************************



I totally sympathise! There are a real shortage of people I've ever felt instant chemistry with. (It's much easier to lust after people on telly somehow!) In fact I can count them on the fingers of one hand the people who have made my insides melt. One was a guy who I tried desperately to pluck up my nerve to flirt with right up until he introduced me to his boyfriend, another was a girl who is so very straight! There were 3 others but either I never approached them or they never noticed I was alive!

A friend of mine once said that I was too picky. I wish she could tell that to my body! There's been a couple of guys that have liked me and been really sweet that I tried to fancy but it was all just a bit of a damp squib! Sigh!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:32 AM

TRISTAN


Ooh, Deepgirl, that is a good one. I'll go for the "general first". I have spent most of my life in front of people (Drama, jobs, etc) and have always had to talk. I don't mean just stand on a stage and talk at people loudly, I mean mingling with the masses in character, etc. I am also in a business that requires me to talk to people daily (insurance). I don't have that much trouble doing it, but here's a secret; if I had my choice, I would rather not actually talk to many people at all.
As far as the opposite sex goes, I have always been a bit hesitant. I am more articulate at writing (I love the internet!), but I can talk when I need to. I of course had the same early school-boy red-faced bashfulness around girls, but I grew out of that around high-school. I now find it easier to talk to females, and generally get along with y'all better than with the males where I now find myself living.

I still meet someone every now and then that can still turn me into a stuttering idiot-boy, but it is rare...I have a feeling it will happen when I meet the BDH's!



Holding until you get back, Captain.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:42 AM

DEEPGIRL187


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
I still meet someone every now and then that can still turn me into a stuttering idiot-boy, but it is rare...I have a feeling it will happen when I meet the BDH's!




LOL. Agreed. I would turn into a babbling moron in a space of about two seconds. Especially in front of Adam Baldwin...and Nathan Fillion...and Alan Tudyk...oh hell, probably all of them.

I also find it easier to talk on the internet or write. It's amazing how fast an idea that sounds so good in your head turns into comeplete gibberish once it finds its way out of your mouth.


**************************************************

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you."

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:52 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by deepgirl187:
Wow, the fourth incarnation. The imponderables just keep coming don't they?

I don't know if this had been brought up already, but here goes:

Since much of this thread doesn't actually apply to me (I've never had a boyfriend or had sex) I thought I'd bring up a topic that does. I've always had trouble talking to people (though when I was a child it was easier to speak with boys). So I was wondering how many of you guys find it easy to speak with the opposite sex, or people in general.

**************************************************




I again sympathise! I was always a silent wallflower with my head buried in a book rather than have to talk to people.

What really helped me was joining the drama society. Once I got over the terror of standing up on stage in front of people nothing was ever as scary again! Plus, I found I really enjoyed pretending to be other people for a while. If you can act like a confident and extrovert person, sooner or later you find it's become less of an act! That's just how it worked for me with strangers in general. Still working on the whole talking to those I really like thing!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:54 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


Oh what a thread! deepgirl187, maybe you should try putting yourself into situation where you have to talk with people. Avoid place where people go trolling for relationships. Try talking with the cashier at the grocery and maybe even the people in line. I know people go hunting at the store, but in general most people just look to the front of the line waiting for their turn. Also try this in an elevator, at the DMV, or go to fundraisers like bake sales, benefit auctions, or benefit car shows. Then use your interests to meet someone with things in common with you. It gets easier with time.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 6:59 AM

PHOENIXROSE

You think you know--what's to come, what you are. You haven't even begun.


Quote:

Originally posted by EmmaRigby:

There are a real shortage of people I've ever felt instant chemistry with. (It's much easier to lust after people on telly somehow!) In fact I can count them on the fingers of one hand the people who have made my insides melt. One was a guy who I tried desperately to pluck up my nerve to flirt with right up until he introduced me to his boyfriend, another was a girl who is so very straight! There were 3 others but either I never approached them or they never noticed I was alive!

A friend of mine once said that I was too picky. I wish she could tell that to my body! There's been a couple of guys that have liked me and been really sweet that I tried to fancy but it was all just a bit of a damp squib! Sigh!


That is sad! I've had that "kinda the wrong sexuality" thing happen, too. Badness.
Yeah, be nice if we could just tell our body to react! I'm close, but there still has to be something for my natural response to work with!

This seems to be a real theme for a lot of people; the one-sided crush. I mean, I've had 'em, but usually there's a fairly mutual attraction. Only in high school was there from-afar lusting after people who never looked at me much. Even that was kinda weak tea, y'know? If I really, really crush on someone I've met, it's likely that they're feelin' something too. I don't know about others really, really crushing on me and being unrequited; never been approached or asked out by someone I wasn't interested in (who actually knew me. Not including clubs and bars and such, here) It's just always seemed like if the chemistry was there, it was there (also assuming they like women-folk. Heh) and if it wasn't really there it kinda died away easy. Any thoughts on this?
Oh! and the talking to people thing. Sometimes I still find it difficult, but other times it's just so easy to start a conversation. I figure if I can't start a conversation with someone, we have nothing to say. I can generally try, but it's usually something like "Hey I like that ring/necklace/piece of clothing" and if something develops from there, I can talk pretty easy. If not, well, they don't wanna talk to me, I guess.

*************************************************
One summer.
One mission.
One legion of Browncoats.

Starting June 23rd, we aim to misbehave.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:01 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


I have no problem speaking to people of the oposite sex. Can have some problems talking to people I dont know though, atleast casually. Bit shy at times.
Have done alot of talking infront of crowds though (larps, a bit theater, schoolprojekts) Not a problem, except i get a huge adrenalin rush everytime that feels good, but can get me kinda distracted.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:01 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


I have no problem speaking to people of the oposite sex. Can have some problems talking to people I dont know though, atleast casually. Bit shy at times.
Have done alot of talking infront of crowds though (larps, a bit theater, schoolprojekts) Not a problem, except i get a huge adrenalin rush everytime that feels good, but can get me kinda distracted.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:01 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


I have no problem speaking to people of the oposite sex. Can have some problems talking to people I dont know though, atleast casually. Bit shy at times.
Have done alot of talking infront of crowds though (larps, a bit theater, schoolprojekts) Not a problem, except i get a huge adrenalin rush everytime that feels good, but can get me kinda distracted.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:01 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


I have no problem speaking to people of the oposite sex. Can have some problems talking to people I dont know though, atleast casually. Bit shy at times.
Have done alot of talking infront of crowds though (larps, a bit theater, schoolprojekts) Not a problem, except i get a huge adrenalin rush everytime that feels good, but can get me kinda distracted.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:01 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


I have no problem speaking to people of the oposite sex. Can have some problems talking to people I dont know though, atleast casually. Bit shy at times.
Have done alot of talking infront of crowds though (larps, a bit theater, schoolprojekts) Not a problem, except i get a huge adrenalin rush everytime that feels good, but can get me kinda distracted.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:01 AM

VINTERDRAKEN


I have no problem speaking to people of the oposite sex. Can have some problems talking to people I dont know though, atleast casually. Bit shy at times.
Have done alot of talking infront of crowds though (larps, a bit theater, schoolprojekts) Not a problem, except i get a huge adrenalin rush everytime that feels good, but can get me kinda distracted.

You can’t stop the Signal.
Keep spreading the word about Firefly!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:22 AM

WORSHIPMAL


What is it about us Browncoats that we always seem to have so very many different things in common?!

I have had a long and varied history of difficulty talking to and getting to know others. In some ways it has gotten much easier as I've gotten older... and on the other hand, I'm much more insulated now and not quite as much of a social butterfly as I was during and immediately post-college. As a kid, I wasn't terribly shy, but I was something of a bookworm. Then in high school, I really retreated into my shell... I was that super-tall slightly nerdy girl, wearing my dad's old baggy clothes and hanging out with the skater kids. I had friends, but at the end of the day I was basically a loner.

It got better in college. I actually started to dress like a girl and by junior year I was not even afraid to wear heels anymore. Which is a big step when you're a girl who's six feet tall barefoot! But there was still a big part of me that found it hard to talk to people, especially the opposite sex. I spent so much of my life feeling like a wallflower that I just didn’t know how to handle it once guys actually seemed to be interested in me. Even now, I don’t feel unattractive anymore but I still think I’m a little more in need of reassurance than the average woman. I am still kind of shy when it comes to talking to new people, but if someone else gets the conversation going, I’m pretty comfortable talking to just about anyone.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:38 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by WorshipMal:
What is it about us Browncoats that we always seem to have so very many different things in common?!

I was not even afraid to wear heels anymore. Which is a big step when you're a girl who's six feet tall barefoot!



Hey I'm a tall girl too! I'm 5'11 (my sister is 6'2 in bare feet) and was wondering whether your height has ever affected meeting men. I'm not bothered by how tall a man is. If their short and a cutie that's just fine by me! But some guys seem to have a real issue dating a taller woman. My ex-boyfriend was about an inch shorter than me (but always claimed we were exactly the same height) and actually asked me to always wear flat shoes when we went out together. I got fed up in the end for being made to feel bad about something I'd always liked (it makes reaching those tall shelves easier, plus with my height my weight simply becomes statuesque. If I was shorter I'd be spherical!).

How about it guys? How would you feel about dating a woman taller than you who could kill you with her pinkie (well, only on a bad PMS day!!)

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:45 AM

DAYVE


i think a lot of people are just so superficial... they, for whatever reason, refuse to accept someone based on appearance, social status, race... but i have learned to avoid that situation. The people i seem to communicate best with, are for the most part, very open, free-thinking individuals who enjoy seeking the knowledge of others. In a situation like that, I don't have any problem speaking and letting my views be heard.
I try to keep an open mind in all regards, but honestly, some people put me off simply by they're unwillingness to accept new ideas or refuse to hear a different opinion...

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:48 AM

TRISTAN


My first wife was an inch shorter than me, but would sometimes wear boots that added a couple of inches to her...it was kinda weird looking up to her. I have known a few women taller than me (I am 6'1"), and it is sometimes a slightly uncomfortable feeling...not bad, just different. I think I could date someone taller than I, but it would take a bit of adjusting.

Holding until you get back, Captain.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:48 AM

TAYEATRA


You can always tell how nervous I am by my accent. I'm naturally accent free, seriously people know I'm from the UK but they can never tell where abouts. The more nervous I am the more it will change. First I'll pick up the accent of the person I'm talking to. Then if I tense up again I pick up something from TV. Amercian and Australian are most common although Welsh or Irish isn't unheard of.
I can't fake an accent deliberately but when I worked retail most customers asked if I was American.
When I get used to talking to certain people my accent slips away again so on the 3rd or 4th meeting people ask what happened to my accent. Makes for some awkward discussions with guys who try to open flirting with 'where are you from?' etc...

*****
Taya
*****
I'm going to S3!!!
(*Insert hysterical celebration dance here*)

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:51 AM

DAYVE


and i like tall girls.... i'm a 6' guy, but have no problem gazing lovinly into chin of lovely lady....

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:52 AM

NVGHOSTRIDER


I was lucky enough to be just over six feet. My little brother is about two inches taller, (and better looking), and was lucky enough to marry a fantastic caring young lady who is actually about two inches taller than he is. I would like to say that I'm glad I attended the wedding because some of her female family members were actually taller than she was. If only they weren't family now. Woops, Springer moment. Anyways, tall women are very attractive granted there is no extra equipment. Now that would be awkward.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:56 AM

WORSHIPMAL


Quote:

Originally posted by EmmaRigby:
Hey I'm a tall girl too!


Hooray! I love meeting other tall women.

Quote:

Originally posted by EmmaRigby:
My ex-boyfriend was about an inch shorter than me (but always claimed we were exactly the same height) and actually asked me to always wear flat shoes when we went out together. I got fed up in the end for being made to feel bad about something I'd always liked.


I'm proud of you for saying you've always liked being tall. I had such a hard time with it for so long. But on the subject of dating shorter men - I am sad to say that I gave up, and NOT because I had a problem with it, but because I never met a guy who didn't. Many say they don't, but in the end I feel like it is always an issue. I don't have a rule against it or anything, but I had a similar experience to yours with my ex (why does he keep coming up so much in my posts? I swear I don't usually talk about him all the time! I guess it just goes to show that even though it was a long and painful journey, I learned a LOT from that relationship). Anyway he was a couple of inches shorter than me and HATED it when I wore heels of more than one or two inches because I really did tower over him. I guess I don't blame him, but in the end it was just one more insecurity for me that I really didn't need.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 7:57 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by Dayve:
and i like tall girls.... i'm a 6' guy, but have no problem gazing lovinly into chin of lovely lady....



LOL!

It was a slight issue with one friend I was flirting with a while back. He was only 5'1 and close dancing with him was an unusual experience. I did worry at one point about smothering him but he didn't seem to mind!!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:12 AM

WORSHIPMAL


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
I have known a few women taller than me (I am 6'1"), and it is sometimes a slightly uncomfortable feeling...not bad, just different.

See, the actual height of each person I think is an important point when it comes to this issue. I’ve known lots of couples where the girl was taller than the guy, especially in heels, but in most of those cases they were both on the shorter side. I think it’s harder for a tall guy to date a taller woman, only because it’s so much more unusual.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:16 AM

MAL4PREZ


Hey WorshipMal - good story! Go you!!

Tall chicks unite - I'm 5'10", and now I want to meet you other tall chicks, I'm rarely the little one in the crowd!

I like being tall, hated it in high school though. Hated it when I was learning to dance because the smaller girls got to do all the cool lifts, but now it's so useful. I can reach things. I can put on extra weight and no one knows. :)

So, not that it's a requirement, but I've always dated men who were equal height or shorter. I would like to be with a tall guy for a while, just for the novelty of it. Is that bad of me?

Re talking - I've only ever been afraid of talking to the Beautiful People (anyone else hear Marilyn Manson here?), you know, the uber stylish trendy ones who watched every episode of Dawson's Creek and Friends and really worry about accessorizing. I just don't have anything in common, and I've known a few of those types who were downright mean.

And it's not that I'm a dog or anything. I'm fine with how I look. Its just not the focus of my life, and I don't like feeling like people are judging me based on my fashion choices and my ability to talk vacuously about nothing.

That's unfair though, there are Beautiful People out there who are very nice and intelligent, so I'm trying to get over it.



-----------------------------------------------
I'm the president. I don't need to listen.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:18 AM

DAYVE


....why do i get the feeling that i've stumbled into the movie..."Attack of the 40 Foot Woman"....??

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:22 AM

TRISTAN


You have a point there. I have never dated someone taller than me barefooted. I think I could do it, but I am not sure.
Pysche-wise, the male is supposed to be larger (read taller) than the female. It is a protection thing, living in our "old" brain. The male is supposed to be able to protect the female (yes, old-fashoined notion, but I still subscribe to it), but if the female is actually taller than the male, it creates a dilema in the male brain. I am not sure about the other males, but when in a potentially hostile situation, I do not look at how muscled or built the threat is, I look at how tall he is. So, if the female is taller, the male can't really protect her. Ok, totally wrong, possibly, but it came in our wiring. Some males can get over this, and I applaud them. I have not been faced with the situation, so I am not sure how I could handle it.


Hope that clarified my first statement a little better...

Holding until you get back, Captain.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:22 AM

TAYEATRA


Quote:

Originally posted by mal4prez:

Re talking - I've only ever been afraid of talking to the Beautiful People (anyone else hear Marilyn Manson here?), you know, the uber stylish trendy ones who watched every episode of Dawson's Creek and Friends and really worry about accessorizing. I just don't have anything in common, and I've known a few of those types who were downright mean.

And it's not that I'm a dog or anything. I'm fine with how I look. Its just not the focus of my life, and I don't like feeling like people are judging me based on my fashion choices and my ability to talk vacuously about nothing.

That's unfair though, there are Beautiful People out there who are very nice and intelligent, so I'm trying to get over it.



-----------------------------------------------
I'm the president. I don't need to listen.



In my 6th form we used to have a name for that particular 'popular' grouping. They were known as the 'So-Shallow' crew. One on their own was fine but more than that and you just avoided them. They seemed to think that everyone had the same opinions as them so they tended to speak up in general terms. Most people just ended up sat there wondering who gave them the right to speak for everyone.

I too am trying to get over this bias because I've noticed I'm naturally inclined to dislike these sorts of people based on past experiences.

Really not fair of me...

*****
Taya
*****
I'm going to S3!!!
(*Insert hysterical celebration dance here*)

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:22 AM

DAYVE


Quote:

Originally posted by EmmaRigby:
I did worry at one point about smothering him but he didn't seem to mind!!



just a quick reference point... most men don't mind being 'smothered' by women....

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:43 AM

WORSHIPMAL


Hey Mal4Prez! It’s super shiny that we’re “outing” all the tall women… guess there are more of us out there than I thought!
Quote:

So, not that it's a requirement, but I've always dated men who were equal height or shorter. I would like to be with a tall guy for a while, just for the novelty of it. Is that bad of me?
I certainly don't think you're wrong to yearn a bit for a taller man. It’s like Tristan said, that’s something that’s hard wired in us to a certain degree. As a tall woman it can be so frustrating because it feels like if you look for a taller man, the dating pool shrivels into this tiny little droplet!

There is another thing I just thought of that I think has a lot to do with the comfort level of the guy when it comes to dating a taller woman… in the case of me and my ex, the more I think about it the more it dawns on me that it wasn’t so much an inherent problem he had with it, but that other people are constantly commenting on it so it never really can become a non-issue. What’s your experience on that front M4P?

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:52 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
You have a point there. I have never dated someone taller than me barefooted. I think I could do it, but I am not sure.
Pysche-wise, the male is supposed to be larger (read taller) than the female. It is a protection thing, living in our "old" brain. The male is supposed to be able to protect the female (yes, old-fashoined notion, but I still subscribe to it), but if the female is actually taller than the male, it creates a dilema in the male brain. I am not sure about the other males, but when in a potentially hostile situation, I do not look at how muscled or built the threat is, I look at how tall he is. So, if the female is taller, the male can't really protect her. Ok, totally wrong, possibly, but it came in our wiring. Some males can get over this, and I applaud them. I have not been faced with the situation, so I am not sure how I could handle it.


Hope that clarified my first statement a little better...

Holding until you get back, Captain.



Grrr argh! This could explain why I've had so much trouble all my life getting dates. Come to think of it I had a stunningly attractive (in my opinion) friend at uni who was of the tall and she had never even been kissed!

However I do forgive you for your silly caveman brain because I think I might have a touch of it too! Most of the women that I find attractive are little and fragile.

Still I do occassionally yearn to be whisked of my feet by a big strong man. Trouble is I've never found one up to the job. I'd always be afraid that they'd crumple under all [mumble mumble] stones of my weight!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 8:59 AM

DAYVE


please forgive the interruption in this fascinating discussion, but i just found this little clip that i think is very funny... and wanted to share with everyone..'specially the shiny people from the UK...

gotta love the BBC

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2006/05/18/watch-bbc-news-interview-_n_2
1201.html

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 9:09 AM

EMMARIGBY


Quote:

Originally posted by Dayve:
please forgive the interruption in this fascinating discussion, but i just found this little clip that i think is very funny... and wanted to share with everyone..'specially the shiny people from the UK...

gotta love the BBC

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2006/05/18/watch-bbc-news-interview-_n_2
1201.html



Oh, I read about this in the paper! Apparently the poor guy was there to apply for an IT job and just thought that this was a really tough interview technique! You gotta feel for him!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 9:14 AM

DAYVE


i thought he did very well... i would hire him!

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 9:32 AM

DAYVE



ok... sorry about that... please continue with the imponderables...

i'll just be over here, sorting my sock drawer....
move along...nothing to see here....move along....


NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 9:35 AM

WORSHIPMAL


LOL - that is great! I love how he just goes with it!

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 9:37 AM

MAL4PREZ


Quote:

Originally posted by WorshipMal:
There is another thing I just thought of that I think has a lot to do with the comfort level of the guy when it comes to dating a taller woman… in the case of me and my ex, the more I think about it the more it dawns on me that it wasn’t so much an inherent problem he had with it, but that other people are constantly commenting on it so it never really can become a non-issue. What’s your experience on that front M4P?



I never had comments from others, but I never talked to any of my boufriends about it either, didn't want to touch a nerve. So maybe it bugs the guy, but I never knew.

Actually, one man I dated in undergrad was an inch shorter than me but he was a cowboy who used to be an Iowa state cheerleader (no shit!) and had no problem with my height. We'd go out swing dancing and he'd flip me over and around and all that. I loved it!

One of my fave couples is a 6'1" woman and maybe 5'8" man, who are so in love and so perfect together because they're both very settled on who they are. And she's an MIT PhD and he's a writer from a Hispanic farming family in CA who are all big on the protective powerful man thing. So it can be overcome, if you meet the right person!

I just like the idea of being able to hug with my head under his chin, you know? And wear high heels without feeling like a giraffe. Of course, I could fulfill that need by making a guy stand on a stair from time to time. There are much more important things than height, and I'll take those first.


-----------------------------------------------
I'm the president. I don't need to listen.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 10:06 AM

DAYVE


well, since i seem to be the one to slow the thread, let me try to get it back on track... as far as dating someone taller or shorter than you... i don't see a real problem.. granted, i've been out of the dating world for some time now, but let me point out a classic example...
In the critically acclaimed film "Napolean Dynamite".... i really thought Kip and Lafonda made a very attractive couple... no?

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 10:14 AM

TRISTAN


Thanks, Dayve, brought me a laugh in the middle of a looong day!
Yes, that is a good example...and a pefect couple, too.

Holding until you get back, Captain.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 10:27 AM

DAYVE


you are welcome, Tristin... but i must apologize to you for something... for whatever reason... earth aligned with mars... my shoe is too tight... i don't know, but i'm just in that Random kind of mood... and i just can't be serious enough to deal with these pressing questions presented here....soooo... i started a rather random thread about something that has preplexed me for years...and here it is....

http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=20786

i'm not trying to hijack anything here, just being silly on a thursday afternoon..


NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 10:29 AM

DEEPGIRL187


The silliness is appreaciated. Please continue.

**************************************************

"The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you."

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 11:11 AM

DAYVE


ok..maybe i've gotten that out of my system now...

thanks for humoring me...

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 11:36 AM

DAYVE


here's something interesting...

By BECI WOOD
Sun Online

BUSTY beauty Pamela Anderson is urging fans to spice up their sex lives by turning vegetarian.
To mark National Orgasm Day in America on Sunday, the blonde babe hailed her healthy diet for her fabulous sex life.

She said: "For your best orgasm ever, go vegetarian."



i knew i gave up those yummy hot dogs for a good reason.....

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 11:41 AM

TRISTAN


Hmm. Don't think I could ever give up meat...tried it for awhile (not on purpose, but during the poor college years) but didn't like it much.
A side note...we're taking advice from Pam Anderson now? Oh, boy...

I have a question...I am pretty sure this has not been brought up in any of the threads so far:
Breast implants...what makes women want/get them? I realize there is a pressure by society (read: stupid fashion magazines/stupid males), but there are plenty of women who just get them.
I can't really understand why you would want to alter your body by placing things into your bodies.
Ladies, help a confused male out?

Holding until you get back, Captain.

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 11:53 AM

SIMONWHO


Seriously, taking advice from someone who (oops) contracted Hepatitis, married some complete drongo, left her porn vids out to be uploaded for all to see...

Though it does bring me to another interesting man/woman thing:

What's your weirdest deal breaker? What one thing will mean that you instantly rule out ever going out with someone?

I couldn't ever date a vegetarian. May well be my loss but I think that on so many levels, it just wouldn't work.

NOTIFY: N   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 11:53 AM

VETERAN

Don't squat with your spurs on.


Quote:

Originally posted by copilot:
Cuddling is my favorite thing in the entire 'verse. ...



I never thought to call it cuddling, but I guess spooning is cuddling. And lying in bed with her inside the crook of my arm with her head on my chest is my favorite way to spend a weekend morning.

Quote:

Originally posted by copilot:
Anyone else ever had the experience of while you are enjoying yourself you laugh histarically during and after sex?



I had a lover who used to start giggling when she climaxed. Used to crack me up. Must have sounded funny with her giggling out of enjoyment and me laughing because her response made me laugh.

What I remember most about her (besides that she looked a lot like Gina) was that we had good synergy and would often climax together. That happen to anyone else much?

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

Thursday, May 18, 2006 11:56 AM

DAYVE


Quote:

Originally posted by Tristan:
A side note...we're taking advice from Pam Anderson now?



well besides the whole pam anderson thing... who knew there was a National Ograsm Day in America ?

NOTIFY: Y   |  REPLY  |  REPLY WITH QUOTE  |  TOP  |  HOME  

YOUR OPTIONS

NEW POSTS TODAY

USERPOST DATE

FFF.NET SOCIAL