GENERAL DISCUSSIONS

WAS Noah's Ark a problem? ...because I think too much

POSTED BY: JACQUI
UPDATED: Wednesday, October 5, 2005 04:26
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Tuesday, October 4, 2005 11:24 PM

JACQUI


This? This is the reason I should never be left alone without medication to think for myself...

Also, this has nothing to do with River and Book, or Book's bible, but it is to do with the Firefly 'verse.

Anyways, I was in the shower (I do my most creative thinking in there), and I was wondering...

On Xiang Jinh, we saw cows, rabbits, and Simon, Wash and Jayne shooing away flies. We've also seen dogs, chickens and horses along the series (probably more, but I can't rightly recall just now).

So animal life is rife among the Universe. Which got me thinking.

They spent decades or so terraforming dozens of new planets and moons to create an Earth like atmosphere (or as close to as possible), which... if you're going to include any kind of sustainable plant life and oxygen rich environment (which they do, 'cause we've seen 'em), then you're going to need all manner of animal minutia.

Not just the big food and work ones, like dogs, cattle, chickens and horses and the like, but the teeny little insects that germinate the plants and keep them healthy and oxygen rich.

Bees, ants, snails, spiders, dragonflies, etc...

Also, when you think about it, in terms of labour animals, horses, oxen, asses, all good for beasts of burden, but if you're serious about building a whole *planet* up from scratch, we're talking the heavy artilery here. We're talking elephants. Which, if you think about it, is near on impossible. That'd be... what... two or three elephants per ship, if that? For dozens of dozens of planets?

So, in reality, there probably was a number of "Noah's Arks". Ships dedicated to bringing the animal life out to planets. Although, I can't really see, in the rush to, you know, find somewhere to keep the human race alive, much thought was given to the survival of animals such as the panda, the platypus or the three toed sloth. Maybe they got left behind.

Can you just imagine that job?

***
Alliance Captain: Listen here, newbie, I've never liked you, so I'm giving you the mission of taking Noah's Ark #534.
Newbie (flipping through handbook): What? Transportation of slug larvae? Are you kidding me? *man* I hate this job.
***

Aboard Noah's Ark #217.

Crew #1: Hey, man, don't you dare come at me with that shovel.
Crew #2: It's your turn.
Crew #1: Isn't that convenient? It's *always* my turn. I don't see *you* knee deep in elephant shit every day. No. Do you realise how disgusting all this elephant crap is? It's intolerable.
Crew #2: It's your turn.
Crew #1: I'll give you a thousand credits if you do it.

***

Operator: Alliance Control, state your coordinates and your problem please?
Ship: Noah's Ark #153. My problem? You want to know my problem? I'll *tell* you my problem. You gave me a mama bear in her last weeks of gestation! And no VET. That's my problem. You hear that in the background? That's an angry bear in labour. WHAT DO I DO?!?!?!?

***

Aboard Noah's Ark #968.

Captain: Johnson! I expressly forbid you to eat the cargo.
Johnson: It's not my fault. The turbulence last week crashed ant vault five. Our cargo has infested the entire protein rations.

***

In conclusion, I surmise that - yes - Noah's Ark really was a problem.



*~*~*
"Your toes are in the sand."
"And your head's up your..."
"Hey!"

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Wednesday, October 5, 2005 3:52 AM

DONCOAT


Perhaps by the time of the evacuation of Earth-That-Was, genetic engineering has reached the level where all they have to do is carry some little DNA samples (or even just DNA data in computer storage), and are then able to recreate the plants and animals after arrival.

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Wednesday, October 5, 2005 4:26 AM

BADGERSHAT


Keep in mind, this all comes from the guy who wrote "Titan A.E." a few years ago--a movie about pretty much exactly this concept of a Noah's Ark type ship loaded with billions of genetic samples of animals and whatnot.


--Jefé The Hat

***************************
--Don't bother trying to predict, figure out, second guess, criticize, or suggest anything that comes from the mind of Joss Whedon, for you shall usually be wrong, and shall find out the Truth and Purpose in due time.
(This is the Truth of Whedoning)

"I like smackin 'em"--Jayne

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