REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

World to end on Saturday.

POSTED BY: OLDENGLANDDRY
UPDATED: Saturday, May 21, 2011 15:47
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Thursday, May 19, 2011 11:16 AM

OLDENGLANDDRY

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Thursday, May 19, 2011 11:24 AM

BYTEMITE


...I was about to start dismissing myself, when they bandied about the oft-cited 200 million number.

Still a coincidence, but now I know where those other bastards were pulling it from. Oh Em Gee, Ima beat their faces.

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Thursday, May 19, 2011 1:55 PM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


Well, I guess I better sign up for a post-rapture looting league; I've had my eye on a nice Bentley for a while now, and what with everyone else being gone, traffic should be light next week!

I wonder who'll take care of the pets, though. :(

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Thursday, May 19, 2011 2:28 PM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!



" The Apocalypse, man. You're soaking in it!"





" I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend. "

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Thursday, May 19, 2011 4:29 PM

ROCKETJOCK


What I love is that Mr. Camper claims The Rapture(TM)will occur at 6 PM local time wherever you are. So presumably it begins at the International Date Line at local 1800 hours, and then sweeps west around the globe like a bleacher-full of sports fans doing the wave . . .

You have to wonder what will happen in states that don't observe Daylight Savings time. Will the saved hover in mid-air for an hour waiting for the clocks to catch up or what?

Hey, what if somebody is worthy of being picked up, but happens to be in a plane going East, crossing the time zones just after the rapture-line passed? It'd be a pisser to miss out on salvation because you were booked on Jet Blue.

"She's tore up plenty. But she'll fly true." -- Zoë Washburn

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Thursday, May 19, 2011 4:45 PM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:

" The Apocalypse, man. You're soaking in it!"





Okay, that was funny. Made me think of "The apocalypse; I has it. I jump in it."

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Thursday, May 19, 2011 5:30 PM

ROCKETJOCK


Just read up on the math this guy uses to calculate the end times -- a bizarre mix of biblical literalism, selective interpretations, off-center numerology, and a handful of fudge-factors added to make things add up the way he wants them to.

I started to get a headache, but then I realized where I'd heard it before: The Jack Benny Program! Dennis Day claimed he had a perfect system for horse-track betting:

Dennis Day: "First I take today's date, June fifteenth. June is the sixth month, so I add six and fifteen, and I get twenty-one. Then I split twenty-one into two and one, add them together, and I get three. Then I add five, which adds up to eight, so I bet on horse number eight."

Jack Benny: "I follow most of that, but why did you add that last five?"

Dennis Day: "How else would you get eight from three?"

The main difference is, Jack Benny was trying to be funny.

"She's tore up plenty. But she'll fly true." -- Zoë Washburn

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Friday, May 20, 2011 1:23 AM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!


Quote:

Originally posted by Kwicko:
Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:

" The Apocalypse, man. You're soaking in it!"




Okay, that was funny. Made me think of "The apocalypse; I has it. I jump in it."



I was quoting Lindsay, from Angel, season 5. Don't recognize your quote.


" I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend. "

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Friday, May 20, 2011 4:34 AM

STORYMARK


Same dude predicted the Rapture happening in '94.

I read a story yesterday on a group of atheists who formed a kennel business, so people can have their pets cared for after the Rapture this weekend. Apparently they have hundreds of customers already.

"I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him."

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Friday, May 20, 2011 5:27 AM

DREAMTROVE


Quote:

Originally posted by Storymark:

Same dude predicted the Rapture happening in '94.



So you're saying he has a history of being wrong ;)

Quote:

I read a story yesterday on a group of atheists who formed a kennel business, so people can have their pets cared for after the Rapture this weekend. Apparently they have hundreds of customers already.


Ah, the opportunities we don't all think of. They should set up a trading post. Prayer beads for jewels and cash. Show us your mammon or GTFO?

That's what a ship is, you know - it's not just a keel and a hull and a deck and sails, that's what a ship needs.

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Friday, May 20, 2011 11:31 AM

NIKI2

Gettin' old, but still a hippie at heart...


These nutcases are fun, aren’t they? But there are far too many of them to keep track of...just since ’96:
Quote:

1996: The book "The Return of Jupiter: End of the world in the light of the Bible" Dorrance Publishing, Pittsburgh PA predicted a disaster starting in the Pacific Ocean: "A terrible earthquake is going to break the oceanic earth crust under the Pacific Ocean by the year 1996 AD"

1996-OCT-23: James Ussher, an Irish archbishop, estimated that the end of the world would occur exactly 6000 years later, in the fall of 1996. This is based on the concept of the "millennial week": that each of the 6 days of creation mentioned in Genesis is linked to a 1000 year time span in the life of the earth. On the 7th millennial day, 1996-OCT-23, Ussher expected that life as we know it will cease.

1997-MAR-8: The Vortex of the Star of David religious sect of Luskville, Quebec, Canada was quoted as predicting the end of the world on Saturday, MAR-8.

1997-APR-10: Dan Millar, of Surrey, BC, Canada and Bob Wadsworth of the Biblical Astronomy newsletter, predicted the arrival of the Antichrist on APR-10. Dan suggested that we watch news from the Vatican and from Jerusalem on that day, because he expected some sort of coup by the Antichrist. He was expected to come to power in the Vatican as Pope Peter II.

1997-OCT-20: A Jewish group, called the Temple Mount and Land of Israel Faithful Movement were expected to attempt to place the cornerstone of a new temple on the Temple Mount in Jerusalem. This is a small piece of real estate that is the most sacred spot in the world to Jews, and one of the most sacred to Muslims. The Rapture Ready home page has predicted that the "Tribulation" would be triggered by that event. Previous attempts had failed either because of riots, or police action. There was one report that they were going to try to airlift the stone by helicopter this time. On OCT-20, several thousand police officers were deployed throughout Jerusalem; they successfully prevented access to the Temple Mount.

1997-NOV-27: The Sacerdotal Knights of National Security report that "A space alien captured at a UFO landing site in eastern Missouri cracked under interrogation by the CIA and admitted that an extraterrestrial army will attack Earth on November 27 with the express purpose of stripping our planet of every natural resource they can find a use for -- and making slaves of every man, woman and child in the world!"

1997: Superdave the Wonderchemist took the magic number 1331 and added it to 666 the "Number of the Beast" from the Book of Revelation to get the year of the arrival of the Antichrist and the end of the world.

See you all tomorrow...or not, bwaaahaahaa...


Hippie Operative Nikovich Nikita Nicovna Talibani,
Contracted Agent of Veritas Oilspillus, code name “Nike”,
signing off



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Friday, May 20, 2011 12:55 PM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!



Apocalypses, Y2K, AGW...


It's always something, with those nut cases, huh?




" I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend. "

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Friday, May 20, 2011 2:10 PM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:

Apocalypses, Y2K, WMD...


It's always something, with those nut cases, huh?




Fixed that for ya, sweetie.

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Friday, May 20, 2011 2:11 PM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:
Quote:

Originally posted by Kwicko:
Quote:

Originally posted by AURaptor:

" The Apocalypse, man. You're soaking in it!"




Okay, that was funny. Made me think of "The apocalypse; I has it. I jump in it."



I was quoting Lindsay, from Angel, season 5. Don't recognize your quote.




I was paraphrasing a Russian guy with a tiny giraffe, from a popular series of commercials. Pop culture. You may have heard of it. Try to keep up.

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Friday, May 20, 2011 2:12 PM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


Note to self: Put off housecleaning, shopping, laundry, and paying the bills until Sunday!

"Although it is not true that all conservatives are stupid people, it is true that most stupid people are conservatives." - John Stuart Mill

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Friday, May 20, 2011 2:22 PM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!


Quote:

Originally posted by Kwicko:


I was paraphrasing a Russian guy with a tiny giraffe, from a popular series of commercials. Pop culture. You may have heard of it. Try to keep up.



It was the paraphrasing that threw me. I offered up a direct quote.

And yeah, those imaginary WMD...






Shhh... you'll wake the Kurds.



" I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend. "

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Friday, May 20, 2011 9:55 PM

HARDWARE


So, it's 4 am on the east coast. I think New Zealand is 17 hours ahead of us, which puts them past the 6pm zero hour. Any word from the Kiwis?

The more I get to know people the more I like my dogs.

...and he that has no sword, let him sell his garment, and buy one. Luke 22:36

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 2:16 AM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


Quote:

Originally posted by Hardware:
So, it's 4 am on the east coast. I think New Zealand is 17 hours ahead of us, which puts them past the 6pm zero hour. Any word from the Kiwis?

The more I get to know people the more I like my dogs.




Haven't heard a peep from them.

Ruh-roh.


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Saturday, May 21, 2011 2:46 AM

AURAPTOR

America loves a winner!


Earth is fairly quiet. Not much in the way of quakes.

No Apocalypse

The bible is wrong.

There is no god.




" I do not love the bright sword for its sharpness, nor the arrow for its swiftness, nor the warrior for his glory. I love only that which they defend. "

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 3:18 AM

FREMDFIRMA




Actually I don't feel "that" fine - further testing and medical exam stuff indicates that by all rights I SHOULD have been dead on the floor Monday morning, that I was even conscious whatever, much less able to stand, stagger to the car and drive to the clinic is a downright miracle, and they have no explaination for then hanging in there for several more days till they figured out what the hell is wrong, since what I got is (apparently) inevitable fatal within four hours of onset...

Does this make me undead ?
(And does this mean I can side with the zombies during the Apocalypse ?)

I dunno, but I feel like some dipshit ran me over with a steamroller and backed up a couple times...
Not helping is all the damn medical residents wanting to write a paper on this one, to which I agreed only so long as they keep the local newsies outta my hair and respect my privacy and anonymity - last thing I wanna see is even more villain-stroking in the local papers right now.

-Frem
I do not serve the Blind God.

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 4:11 AM

HARDWARE


Holy crap Frem! Concentrate on getting better!

In other news, let the backpedaling begin!

The more I get to know people the more I like my dogs.

...and he that has no sword, let him sell his garment, and buy one. Luke 22:36

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 4:16 AM

ANTHONYT

Freedom is Important because People are Important


Hello,

Jesus Christ!

Definitely shun the newsies.

Lest word get around that you were in the hospital with a fatal illness, and then rose from certain death a few days later, defying all expectation...

Just in time to herald the apocalypse.

Somewhere, there is an evangelical missionary type saying, "I met him once! I had no idea he was the Lord! His eyes burned like fire! He had the strength of ten men, and he wielded a mighty staff. He called it a boom stick. Or something French. I can't recall, quite, as I was blinded by His Glory."

--Anthony





_______________________________________________

“If you are not free to choose wrongly and irresponsibly, you are not free at all”

Jacob Hornberger

“Freedom is not worth having if it does not connote freedom to err. It passes my comprehension how human beings, be they ever so experienced and able, can delight in depriving other human beings of that precious right.”

Mahatma Gandhi

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 6:33 AM

BYTEMITE


Was it three days, Frem? Were you hospitalized for three days?

I'm with Anthony on this one, I think the collective religious faithful of Wayne County Michigan just said "oh crap."

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 6:50 AM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Yanno how you were railroaded into being on the City Council once?

Ruh roh!

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 8:18 AM

FREMDFIRMA


Well, I have always maintained that Fate, the Gods, whatever runs this little universe, has a damn sick sense of humor - and seemingly have spent a lot of my life rather on the business end of that theory...
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/WeirdnessMagnet

And yeah, I *think* it was three days, lost some time in there and it's all kinda fuzzy a bit, even more annoying that the entire first course of treatment was completely useless - right now it's a little hard to type cause the neuro problems are still workin me over and my hands have that stingy-throbby feeling like right after you slam one in the door by accident, only on and on and on, yick, no fun that, especially typing!
(Yes, imma stubborn jackass...)

Funny thing yesterday though, the guy I pulled the favor from to load up my fridge with appropriate groceries had a kind of easy payback for me, his dipwad cousin doesn't have a license (too many DUI/DWI's) and he needed someone to drive his truck back and forth to the dump a couple times - just drive, dipwad cousin would load/unload and all...
And one of the things with having a rep for damn near invincibility is that when you *are* really run down and screwed, no one believes you - although, I think he had a point when I protested.
Quote:

You old hillbilly, the day YOU can't drive they'll be shovelling you into a HOLE, don't bullshit me!

Actually I think it helped, having a "mission", something to DO, to focus on, instead of how bloody miserable I feel... recovery is gonna take a bit, especially as imma stubborn jackass bonehead who keeps doin things when I should be resting (like laundry, at the moment), but I am, who I am...

Anyhows, thanks for listening to me whine, eh - though I've not actually met any of ya, I do consider y'all friends, at least of a sort, neh ?

-Frem
I do not serve the Blind God.

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 9:48 AM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


Frem, hang in there, and let us know if there's anything we can help with or do for you.

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 11:23 AM

OLDENGLANDDRY

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 12:15 PM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)


The Pope reportedly placed a call to the Shuttle astronauts today. I bet he was asking them if they'd seen a bunch of bodies float past!

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 1:49 PM

GEEZER

Keep the Shiny side up


I dunno. The waitress brought my Martini (Hendrick's. Up with a twist) at just past 6:00, and it was Rapture for me.

"Keep the Shiny side up"

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 1:53 PM

MAGONSDAUGHTER


It's Sunday here and the world is still the same old mad place it always was.

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 2:27 PM

SIGNYM

I believe in solving problems, not sharing them.


Quote:

I dunno. The waitress brought my Martini (Hendrick's. Up with a twist) at just past 6:00, and it was Rapture for me.
FFPWAAAAHHHH!

Okay, now you owe me a keyboard!

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Saturday, May 21, 2011 3:47 PM

PIRATENEWS

John Lee, conspiracy therapist at Hollywood award-winner History Channel-mocked SNL-spoofed PirateNew.org wooHOO!!!!!!


The crazy preacher owns a radio station network worth $120-million.

So this crazy preacher made at least $10-million today.

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