ASK MAD CHRIS...with Chrisisall by chrisisall

REAL WORLD EVENT DISCUSSIONS

ASK MAD CHRIS...with Chrisisall

POSTED BY: CHRISISALL
UPDATED: Sunday, April 19, 2009 15:35
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VIEWED: 3120
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Saturday, April 18, 2009 8:09 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by OPPYH:
Electric cars are just around the corner. What are we going to do with the millions of gas stations everywhere(I'm really worried).
Thanks.

Dear Thanks, that's a very interesting question.
The truth is that they WOULD be getting set to close en masse, except that the coming World-wide insurrection will cause an increase in demand for use in molotov cocktails, a popular anti-authority weapon of choice. So no, they won't be closing any time soon, it's cool.

The laughing Chrisisall

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Saturday, April 18, 2009 12:26 PM

WHOZIT

You're a fraud! You've got nothing! You're ugly!

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Saturday, April 18, 2009 1:07 PM

OPPYH

(Note: I realize this isn't traffic related, but I need insight to issues beyond traffic. I think you can help)
I put a baked potato in the microwave. It turned out that half of it was icy cold, and the other half was so hot I almost burned my lip.

Is this science, or Karma?

Again, Thank you.

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 4:24 AM

CHRISISALL

Quote:
Originally posted by OPPYH:

I put a baked potato in the microwave. It turned out that half of it was icy cold, and the other half was so hot I almost burned my lip.

Is this science, or Karma?

Many microwaves have a single beam emitter and depend on the rotation of the carousel to evenly heat food. But when food varies in density or size or shape this can lead to the fire & ice syndrome. My advice is run the microwave over with your car, being careful not to puncture your tires on the sharp corners.
This is karma.

The laughing Chrisisall

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 5:50 AM

CHRISISALL

Quote:
Originally posted by whozit:
You're a fraud!

That's a LIE!!!

Quote:
You've got nothing!

Less to lose that way!

Quote:
You're ugly!

How can you tell?

Time for an E-mail:

"Dear Mad, my teenage son is always taking his car to parts unknown, and staying out late. I hid his keys, but apparently he made copies. How do I stop this activity short of involving the authorities?"

So simple. Give his tank some sugar, baby.

The laughing Chrisisall

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 6:53 AM

BYTEMITE

Peacekeeper: I actually know the real answer to that one. It's because no one really wears a sword while mounted horseback anymore, so America felt there was no real reason to observe the old rule about keeping your right hand towards an approaching horse rider. England decided to stick with the old tradition, having grown used to over 1000 years of observing it, so there you go.

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 7:30 AM

MALBADINLATIN

Why shouldn't I criticize NASCAR, Disney, and the south for the Neocon shills that they are.

Fox News, the place to go for news if news is not what you really want

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 9:19 AM

CHRISISALL

Quote:
Originally posted by Bytemite:
Peacekeeper: I actually know the real answer to that one.

Mine WAS the real answer, yours is merely also true.

The laughing Chrisisall

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 9:28 AM

CHRISISALL

Quote:
Originally posted by MalBadInLatin:
Why shouldn't I criticize NASCAR, Disney, and the south for the Neocon shills that they are.

I just get the sense, and correct me if I'm wrong, that you posted here by accident...

Time for an E-mail:

"Dear Mad Chris, I wanna know why traffic lights on long major roads aren't linked by computer & coordinated- it seems so amateur to have to stop then go, just to stop again, don't you think?"- Spridal Racer, LI

Spridal (if that's your real name

), the lights ARE linked by computer, that's WHY they seem uncoordinated- the better to frustrate drivers into making decisions & mistakes that will result in tickets (read: revenue).

The laughing Chrisisall

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 10:26 AM

BYTEMITE

Sorry! Bad wording.

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 10:41 AM

CHRISISALL

Quote:
Originally posted by Bytemite:
Bad wording.

That would be, in my opinion, the common sign "Bridge freezes before road." Once, as a teenager, I came across this sign one summer night for the first time and crashed into a tree because I was so absolutely discombobulated as to the meaning of the warning.

The laughing Chrisisall

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 12:36 PM

KWICKO

"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." -- William Casey, Reagan's presidential campaign manager & CIA Director (from first staff meeting in 1981)

"Slow Children At Play" always seemed a bit cruel, too...

Mike

Build a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day...
Set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

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Sunday, April 19, 2009 12:51 PM

CHRISISALL